Agosto, o mês do desgosto
So, August. My old friend, my old enemy...mostly enemy. Ever since August of 2000, this month has been fucked up for me save the last few years. In August 2000 my heart was broken and then healed, only to be broken again in August of 2001. Admittedly the details of why August '02 and '03 sucked have faded from my mind, but it was in '02 that noticed the pattern. Checking back on my old entries from then, it seems I wrote something similar to this in '04 following a little emotional self-torture. Guess this makes this post a rerun. Har.
But you know, the first 11 days of August haven't been bad at all for me. I guess that's a nice big plus for me so far.
I recently heard from the girl that was at the center of it all back in 2000 and she was in a much happier place in her life than she'd been in all the years that I've known her. Although the emotional aspect of our friendship that totally fucked me up has been pretty well dead and buried for the last 5 years, I couldn't help cheering a little for her when I read that. With all of the bullshit she's had to put up with (including the load I contributed at the time) it was good to hear her talk about being happy and feeling good for once instead of cutting and feeling like a waste of a person that nobody could ever really love.
I'd like to make an entry like that some day. Maybe even during the month of August.
But you know, the first 11 days of August haven't been bad at all for me. I guess that's a nice big plus for me so far.
I recently heard from the girl that was at the center of it all back in 2000 and she was in a much happier place in her life than she'd been in all the years that I've known her. Although the emotional aspect of our friendship that totally fucked me up has been pretty well dead and buried for the last 5 years, I couldn't help cheering a little for her when I read that. With all of the bullshit she's had to put up with (including the load I contributed at the time) it was good to hear her talk about being happy and feeling good for once instead of cutting and feeling like a waste of a person that nobody could ever really love.
I'd like to make an entry like that some day. Maybe even during the month of August.