Lost and confused
Im amazed at what i blogged previously. It sounded so deep that i keep thinking if i copied it from somewhere or what *self-highfive* heh
So in the end i gave up, i let the devil in me to convince that that job wasnt right for me, that i shld gave up even when i haven found another alternative, that maybe something better was outside waiting for me.
Till now i still dont really know if that was a right choice. I mean i got familar and close with the environment and people but somehow the job was wearing me down. It wasnt much of a regret but a "then now how?" Someone said before that first year of working life was always gonna be "im dying so want to quit" and it will eventually go off after the first year. Yet that got in the best of me and won, i gave in and pull the white flag out. And my only excuse to people was #yolo.
Subconsciously somehow deep inside, i knew i gave up too easily (only after 5-6mths), i shld have push on but i didnt. I mean i didnt enjoy the jobscope which was really the main trigger that made me quit thou i did learn things from there, thou the environment and people was pretty good over there.
I guess thats why im really afraid to take up the next job. I need to really think carefully and not make history repeat itself again. Then again, people keep telling you "you never try you never know" so wheres the balance point in this?
Im still trying to search for what i like what i enjoy. I admit that im in a lost jungle in an confused state of mind of whats going on in my life and what to do next. Its actually pretty scary considering that i keep psyching myself out. Keep pushin myself down to drown thou i know i cant swim.
Then you see those stories of people who are far worst than you, in a deeper shit than you and they make it eventually. And i start thinking, "what the hell are you doing, you're not even in the worst case scenario and you're making yourself seem that way" so what shld i do now?
Keep positive keep your head up and i'll be able to reach there! I can do it, i will make it!
Im gonna be alright aye, eventually?
I'm actually hell surprise if i ever see a reply here from any of my friends considering everyone actually abandon lj already hahahaah.
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