Two Days
Two Days until NaNoWriMo starts, and I don't feel prepared at all, but I'm just going to be a pantser this year, I guess. I wrote out a timeline, but I think mostly I just need to start writing and see where it goes.
I'm watching a video right now on Facebook by Carol Tuttle. She's the Child Whisperer lady. I go back and forth between feeling like I'm a Type 1 or a Type 2. Does anybody else read those books? When I read the kids one, I recognize a lot of Type 2 traits from when I was a kid. But I don't relate to them as an adult. I don't know what that means. I don't know if it really matters, but it's something I want to figure out about myself. Andrew thinks it's all silly. I tell him it's true to his Type 4 nature to be skeptical. haha He rolls his eyes at me. :D
There's a lot going on in my life at the moment. Well, I guess just one major thing that's really thrown me for a loop. My Granny is dying. She's 88 years old. She's eating less and less every day. She hasn't gotten out of bed in weeks. I try not to dwell on it too much, but it really hurts. She is my mom's mom. I feel like she was the last connection I had to my mom. It almost feels like I'm losing her all over again. I've been calling almost every day. I haven't been able to talk to her, but I talk to my Uncle Sammy who is taking care of her. It is very hard on him, but I'm so grateful he's there, and she isn't in a nursing home.
Also, since I'm about to start writing in my book again, and it's about my mom, I've been thinking a lot about the night that she died. I asked my siblings questions about it, and well, I'm glad that we're talking about it instead of just ignoring it or joking about it. It's nice to feel like I'm not the only one that hurts.
Grief is a strange beast. It doesn't matter how many years it's been. You can still feel as much pain as you felt when it happened. There was a quote by Sylvester Stallone on an episode of This Is Us a few weeks ago that I thought was perfect.
"In my experience Kevin, there is no such thing as a long time ago. There's only memories that mean something and memories that don't."
I related a lot to Kevin in that moment. It's hard to remember sometimes. But I want to at the same time.
That's such a good show. I'm behind, though.
Tomorrow is Halloween! My kids are excited. I wonder how many more years I have of Evan wanting to go Trick or Treating and dressing up. Once we get past Halloween, I'll post pictures of their costumes. We already had the church Trunk or Treat, but that was a crazy day, and Andrew ended up being in charge of getting the 3 youngest dressed while I was driving back from Nashville. He didn't get individual shots, so I want to do that on Halloween.
Well, my kids are out of quiet time, so I guess I need to end this. I miss writing. I need to do it more often. I guess I will be next month.
I'm watching a video right now on Facebook by Carol Tuttle. She's the Child Whisperer lady. I go back and forth between feeling like I'm a Type 1 or a Type 2. Does anybody else read those books? When I read the kids one, I recognize a lot of Type 2 traits from when I was a kid. But I don't relate to them as an adult. I don't know what that means. I don't know if it really matters, but it's something I want to figure out about myself. Andrew thinks it's all silly. I tell him it's true to his Type 4 nature to be skeptical. haha He rolls his eyes at me. :D
There's a lot going on in my life at the moment. Well, I guess just one major thing that's really thrown me for a loop. My Granny is dying. She's 88 years old. She's eating less and less every day. She hasn't gotten out of bed in weeks. I try not to dwell on it too much, but it really hurts. She is my mom's mom. I feel like she was the last connection I had to my mom. It almost feels like I'm losing her all over again. I've been calling almost every day. I haven't been able to talk to her, but I talk to my Uncle Sammy who is taking care of her. It is very hard on him, but I'm so grateful he's there, and she isn't in a nursing home.
Also, since I'm about to start writing in my book again, and it's about my mom, I've been thinking a lot about the night that she died. I asked my siblings questions about it, and well, I'm glad that we're talking about it instead of just ignoring it or joking about it. It's nice to feel like I'm not the only one that hurts.
Grief is a strange beast. It doesn't matter how many years it's been. You can still feel as much pain as you felt when it happened. There was a quote by Sylvester Stallone on an episode of This Is Us a few weeks ago that I thought was perfect.
"In my experience Kevin, there is no such thing as a long time ago. There's only memories that mean something and memories that don't."
I related a lot to Kevin in that moment. It's hard to remember sometimes. But I want to at the same time.
That's such a good show. I'm behind, though.
Tomorrow is Halloween! My kids are excited. I wonder how many more years I have of Evan wanting to go Trick or Treating and dressing up. Once we get past Halloween, I'll post pictures of their costumes. We already had the church Trunk or Treat, but that was a crazy day, and Andrew ended up being in charge of getting the 3 youngest dressed while I was driving back from Nashville. He didn't get individual shots, so I want to do that on Halloween.
Well, my kids are out of quiet time, so I guess I need to end this. I miss writing. I need to do it more often. I guess I will be next month.