start of winter break
A month in Northbrook!
I can't seem to fully enjoy this freedom because I have grades looming over me. Grades and financial paperwork to deal with. I think that before the break begins I should try to ditch my attitude from Thanksgiving and be happy and jolly like the holiday season tells me to be. I can do this.
It's very annoying to have the restriction of having to ask my parents if I can go out. Very, very frustrating to adjust from going wherever I want to being cooped up in the house when I want to leave.
It's going to be interesting to see people from high school again, that's for sure. But part of me is excited. I definitely know that I have changed. The way I think, talk, dress, act. This should be fun. I had Robin come over on Sunday and we hung out for a while. Luckily she lives in Skokie and is one of my closest friends from school and we could in theory see each other all the time like we do at school. I'm going to miss Wes for sure. =( I had lunch with Lauren today at Noodles and Company and it was nice. Nice. We talked a LOT, but I was definitely keeping myself censored quite a bit. She is REALLY against drinking and... yeah. I just didn't have the heart to tell her that I didn't agree with her.
But anyways, yeah. I'm starting to miss the loud, obnoxious, and crazy fun I have in college. But I am going to make this winter break work for me here. There's no reason why it can't still be awesome. Right? I just think that the way I left GBN was very "I NEED TO LEAVE. TOO MANY POORLY ENDED RELATIONSHIPS." and that's allowed me to go to college with the attitude where I wanted to be free to explore and find myself. And I have for the most part found ME. But this really severs a lot of ties with some people from GBN. I didn't work at keeping old relationships, because I'll put in effort, but when I don't feel any effort on the other person's part, I stop. There's no point in investing yourself if the other person doesn't care enough to. I've learned that. So in conclusion, things are weird at home. But definitely have chances for improvement?
I wish I was more confident about this.
I can't seem to fully enjoy this freedom because I have grades looming over me. Grades and financial paperwork to deal with. I think that before the break begins I should try to ditch my attitude from Thanksgiving and be happy and jolly like the holiday season tells me to be. I can do this.
It's very annoying to have the restriction of having to ask my parents if I can go out. Very, very frustrating to adjust from going wherever I want to being cooped up in the house when I want to leave.
It's going to be interesting to see people from high school again, that's for sure. But part of me is excited. I definitely know that I have changed. The way I think, talk, dress, act. This should be fun. I had Robin come over on Sunday and we hung out for a while. Luckily she lives in Skokie and is one of my closest friends from school and we could in theory see each other all the time like we do at school. I'm going to miss Wes for sure. =( I had lunch with Lauren today at Noodles and Company and it was nice. Nice. We talked a LOT, but I was definitely keeping myself censored quite a bit. She is REALLY against drinking and... yeah. I just didn't have the heart to tell her that I didn't agree with her.
But anyways, yeah. I'm starting to miss the loud, obnoxious, and crazy fun I have in college. But I am going to make this winter break work for me here. There's no reason why it can't still be awesome. Right? I just think that the way I left GBN was very "I NEED TO LEAVE. TOO MANY POORLY ENDED RELATIONSHIPS." and that's allowed me to go to college with the attitude where I wanted to be free to explore and find myself. And I have for the most part found ME. But this really severs a lot of ties with some people from GBN. I didn't work at keeping old relationships, because I'll put in effort, but when I don't feel any effort on the other person's part, I stop. There's no point in investing yourself if the other person doesn't care enough to. I've learned that. So in conclusion, things are weird at home. But definitely have chances for improvement?
I wish I was more confident about this.