queen's holiday
now, im actually writing and its a public holiday. i havent been on here in a while and i could say there hasn't really been any changes. for the past months i have been rolling around in a negative spiral. i was getting up with no purpose and just trying my everyday doing things that i thought might chagne something in my life. but nothing has bore fruit. i had a quick getaway in japan, and that was good. i met up with my family, i realized i missed them, and i didn't which was weird. i left manila to be here in au to start a new life, and i cant even get a proper job. basically, im leaving, im heading back to manila when things still dont pick up by the time i hit 1 year here. my savings are dry. even below dry and i cannot keep living like this. i can't anymore. i decided to give myself 1 month, no holds bar break. to live my life without restrictions and damn the consequences for 1 month, because if this 1 month flies off the way its going, im going back anyway. whatever opportunities i had, it'd probably be the same. i dont know anymore.
ive always been religious, so i dont know. i feel like God answers all the prayers that i need. but this one thing, to have work, i feel like he hasn't. or he has and i just keep ignoring his signs and gifts. i dont know. whatever happens. things are definitely changing in august. whether that is good or bad. we will see.
ive always been religious, so i dont know. i feel like God answers all the prayers that i need. but this one thing, to have work, i feel like he hasn't. or he has and i just keep ignoring his signs and gifts. i dont know. whatever happens. things are definitely changing in august. whether that is good or bad. we will see.