Because, there hasn't been a real update in a WHILE
THIS IS A RANT ABOUT MANY THINGS school, amber, summer,boys and other. you have been warned.
I've rediscovered my love for Des'ree. Jesus, her music is beautiful. Ahem, so. I got a new roommate the week before Spring Break. She is ahhhhmazing. We get along very well. MUCH much better than the other one.
School is, school. I'm slacking really badly in western civ… like, I didn't do a major paper… and all of this school stuff is so *stressful*. I’m trying to be good but I have two ten page papers due on the same day and an English paper due 3 days before those. It’s so ridiculously daunting and this REALLY sucks. If it was a subject I even partially enjoyed this wouldn’t be happening. I’m *battling* to keep my 4.0 major GPA [the other one isn’t even worth mentioning *gag*]. In some good news, I got a really fucking good lottery number for housing so I can pull the whole suite I’m living with in to pretty much wherever we want. My number is 18. *glee*
This summer is ALREADY completely booked up. WTF? I’m staying here after school for the week before and prom weekend [first weekend in june]. It’s gonna be a total party fest. Ally and two of her cool friends invited me to the shore house down exit 2. Way the fuck down the shore… and it’s us 4 alone. PAR-TY. Then that weekend I’m going back up to RIGHT by school and partying with Melissa and her friends for prom weekend… THEN on June 10th I’m flying to Ft. Lauderdale for two weeks, getting back to Jersey on the 24th. Then soon after that I’m driving to Ohio. I’ll probably be in Ohio until about… august? Mid-august? Really whenever I choose to leave, but it will be AFTER family camping [either first or second week in July.] the whole time I’m in jersey I’ll be working probably two jobs… Panera and the bookstore, if I can swing it. then, school starts. It’s fucking crazy. I have no time to BREATHE let alone visit anyone [is that for the better?].
On a romantic note, I don’t know what is going on with me and amber. I wish I could say we’re totally not dating but… I can’t. She, I talk to her all the time. I fell asleep on the phone with her the other night, and to be honest it’s the best sleep I've gotten in a while. I miss her, but at the same time I don’t know if it’s actually her I miss or the idea of her. I just have this fucking weird feeling that we’re supposed to be together. I've NEVER let fate, or whatever, rule my life, but this is just… our chemistry is undeniable. But, she drives me crazy! She’s not the type I go for [besides her curly, dark hair X-D] she smokes too much weed, her life is in a downward spiral lately… and when I hear her talk about this girl she lusts over [who has a boyfriend BUT recently what happened with us is happening with them, the whole-she-had-a-boyfriend-then-I-kind-of-sort-of-turned-her-and-we-dated-only-to-collapse-into-a-ball-of-flame-thing.] and then tell me that she wishes I was there and she misses me and all of this stuff is fucking with my brain. I was watching gossip girl with my roommate [sue me, blake lively is fucking hot] and there was this scene where the two people make their exes SO jealous by making out right in front of them.. and I just want to grab a girl and make amber so *mad*. Why is it so HARD to find a date around here!!! Jesus fuck!
Also, why do guy friends that *know* I’m gay, which I tell them every time I possibly can, still hit on me RELENTLESSLY?! Seriously! It’s SAD! GET OVER IT! and stop with the, “oh, well if you’d just give me a try…” bullshit! I’M GAY ASSHOLE. DICK IS NASTY! Should I just ignore it? or should I be offended. Sometimes I laugh it off, and am like erm, no. but sometimes they take it too far.
Huh. I feel a little better. Well, if you read all this, complete props.
here is a weird picture of me. my hair was very red today, and my eyes were *very* blue.
i forgot to add my slight new obsession to Otalia. FUCK THEY'RE AWESOME.
I've rediscovered my love for Des'ree. Jesus, her music is beautiful. Ahem, so. I got a new roommate the week before Spring Break. She is ahhhhmazing. We get along very well. MUCH much better than the other one.
School is, school. I'm slacking really badly in western civ… like, I didn't do a major paper… and all of this school stuff is so *stressful*. I’m trying to be good but I have two ten page papers due on the same day and an English paper due 3 days before those. It’s so ridiculously daunting and this REALLY sucks. If it was a subject I even partially enjoyed this wouldn’t be happening. I’m *battling* to keep my 4.0 major GPA [the other one isn’t even worth mentioning *gag*]. In some good news, I got a really fucking good lottery number for housing so I can pull the whole suite I’m living with in to pretty much wherever we want. My number is 18. *glee*
This summer is ALREADY completely booked up. WTF? I’m staying here after school for the week before and prom weekend [first weekend in june]. It’s gonna be a total party fest. Ally and two of her cool friends invited me to the shore house down exit 2. Way the fuck down the shore… and it’s us 4 alone. PAR-TY. Then that weekend I’m going back up to RIGHT by school and partying with Melissa and her friends for prom weekend… THEN on June 10th I’m flying to Ft. Lauderdale for two weeks, getting back to Jersey on the 24th. Then soon after that I’m driving to Ohio. I’ll probably be in Ohio until about… august? Mid-august? Really whenever I choose to leave, but it will be AFTER family camping [either first or second week in July.] the whole time I’m in jersey I’ll be working probably two jobs… Panera and the bookstore, if I can swing it. then, school starts. It’s fucking crazy. I have no time to BREATHE let alone visit anyone [is that for the better?].
On a romantic note, I don’t know what is going on with me and amber. I wish I could say we’re totally not dating but… I can’t. She, I talk to her all the time. I fell asleep on the phone with her the other night, and to be honest it’s the best sleep I've gotten in a while. I miss her, but at the same time I don’t know if it’s actually her I miss or the idea of her. I just have this fucking weird feeling that we’re supposed to be together. I've NEVER let fate, or whatever, rule my life, but this is just… our chemistry is undeniable. But, she drives me crazy! She’s not the type I go for [besides her curly, dark hair X-D] she smokes too much weed, her life is in a downward spiral lately… and when I hear her talk about this girl she lusts over [who has a boyfriend BUT recently what happened with us is happening with them, the whole-she-had-a-boyfriend-then-I-kind-of-sort-of-turned-her-and-we-dated-only-to-collapse-into-a-ball-of-flame-thing.] and then tell me that she wishes I was there and she misses me and all of this stuff is fucking with my brain. I was watching gossip girl with my roommate [sue me, blake lively is fucking hot] and there was this scene where the two people make their exes SO jealous by making out right in front of them.. and I just want to grab a girl and make amber so *mad*. Why is it so HARD to find a date around here!!! Jesus fuck!
Also, why do guy friends that *know* I’m gay, which I tell them every time I possibly can, still hit on me RELENTLESSLY?! Seriously! It’s SAD! GET OVER IT! and stop with the, “oh, well if you’d just give me a try…” bullshit! I’M GAY ASSHOLE. DICK IS NASTY! Should I just ignore it? or should I be offended. Sometimes I laugh it off, and am like erm, no. but sometimes they take it too far.
Huh. I feel a little better. Well, if you read all this, complete props.
here is a weird picture of me. my hair was very red today, and my eyes were *very* blue.
i forgot to add my slight new obsession to Otalia. FUCK THEY'RE AWESOME.