Without You
All weekend I've been working on movie credits for my class. The movie is about going to the AeroDesign West Competition with Aerobrick three and half years ago. Looking at all of the pictures has been making me feel exceptionally weird. Partly because it has been more than three years and my life is so far away from that aspect of my life. However, I'm mainly feeling weird because Eric is in almost every picture. Therefore it makes me rather sad to see him happy knowing that he is no longer a part of my life and I will probably never see or talk to him again. I guess I have tried to not think about him so that it doesn't hurt. But living back in J2 doesn't help. I miss having him living across the way in K2 even though it used to tear me up inside. At least I felt comfortable knowing that he was there if anything happened. I don't feel nostalgic, just depressed because I now I'm never going to see him again. I remember that somethings about him were weird but I liked that. I think I was too immature for him back then. Then again I think that three months ago I was immature. I've grown a lot in the last few months. Perhaps the fact that I am actually going to graduate is forcing me to grow up. Which is why I keep wondering if Eric and I would work out if we did start to go out again. I have no clue. I know I have changed and I'm sure he has. I know I made a post about relationships a few months back and an anonymous person left a comment about love being "a three edged sword". Part of me wants to think Eric left that comment. It would be like him to keep watching my journal even though we don't talk at all. But I have no way of knowing. Anyways, I need to go finish editing pictures so I can animate them.