The curse of the Vuvuzealot
Tell me, O Wise Ones of The InterWeb: are there long-term health effects associated with blowing the Vuvuzela?
And if not, why not? I ask merely for infomation... And in the hope that the benighted oiks who play* the blasted things will die a horrible death. Or better still, be struck by some embarrassing debilitation that will make their fellow-citizens and denizens stop in horrified dismay and pity. Or point at them and laugh.
Burst blood vessels? Ruptured eardrums? Disturbingly misshapen heads though asymmetric inflation of the sinuses? Some unmentionable gastrointestinal malady arising from the small percentage of swallowed air which, with excessive blowing and without the training of a proper wind-instrument, adds up to several times the volume of the vuvuzealot?
It would be a terrible thing if I were forced to do the work of The Almighty by myself, and impose the medical consequences by seizing every voovelist and ramming the repellent instrument up one nostril. Or some other orifice, with a more fitting sound, so that they can play the instrument as they walk, albeit somewhat uncomfortably.
*Play? What is the verb? Perpetrate? Parp? Honk? Blow? Give wind? Operate? Flatulate?