Feets don't fail me now!
Every so often the skin on one of my feet becomes too dry...because I am pathologically forgetful when it comes to creams, lotions, and ointments...and a painful crack forms. This usually only lasts for no more than 2 or 3 eternally angst-ridden days during which I obsessively keep the area clean (diabetic foot paranoia, y'all!) and then slather it with a combination of Neosporin and some sort of heavy-duty moisturizer. My left foot has just fallen victim to this affliction. I know that, should I do all of the right things, this annoyance will go away, but right now I just want someone to chop off my foot right quick. Arg.