Halfway through college? When did that happen?
It's funny to think how OCD about lj I used to be, posting at least five times a day, and now I post maybe once a month. Interesting. Well, I am back at SU, mostly settled into my house and am rocking out with the SUMB once again. Band camp was a near death experience, but I made it.
It's so weird to be a junior. I live off campus. I am halfway through my college experience. I am 20! No longer a teen. I have to buy groceries for me and just me. The microwave is my favorite appliance, ha ha. I should learn how to cook, but I'll wait until post band. I have too little time.
I just feel so...grown up. I don't know. It's scary. I'm looking at grad schools because I'll need to be visiting over spring break and the summer because I'll be applying next fall. AAAHHH!!! Real life decisions are to be made. I'm starting to really cozy up to the idea of going to USC to California. Meaning I'll be in LA. Which sounds absolutely fabulous. The program is ranked numero uno in the country. We'll see if I can get in and get money. Aaaahhh it's so huge to think about.
I'm just in a bizarre place right now. I really feel like I need to grow up in Christ and I just feel so waited down by the areas that I struggle in. Spiritual warfare is a real thing and Hod has huge awesome plans that Satan doesn't like. I really need prayer right now. Especially for my heart. I still haven't healed from mistakes I've made and my heart really needs to be fixed on Jesus, it needs to be fiercely guarded.
It's kind of daunting sometimes to think of the person I know I can be. It feels like there are so many obstacles in the way. But church really hit me this week. When Craig made the point of how would your actions change if you wore a t-shirt that said I'm a Christian all the time. I can think of a lot. And I'm working on it. And it's by God's grace that I'll change, not my own effort. But oh this world is a difficult place to live some days.
But there is hope.
Jesus is my hero. He died for me so that I may have life with him, so that I may die to myself but be alive in him. It's precious and beautiful and I don't deserve it, but humbly I'll accept that precious gift.
It's so weird to be a junior. I live off campus. I am halfway through my college experience. I am 20! No longer a teen. I have to buy groceries for me and just me. The microwave is my favorite appliance, ha ha. I should learn how to cook, but I'll wait until post band. I have too little time.
I just feel so...grown up. I don't know. It's scary. I'm looking at grad schools because I'll need to be visiting over spring break and the summer because I'll be applying next fall. AAAHHH!!! Real life decisions are to be made. I'm starting to really cozy up to the idea of going to USC to California. Meaning I'll be in LA. Which sounds absolutely fabulous. The program is ranked numero uno in the country. We'll see if I can get in and get money. Aaaahhh it's so huge to think about.
I'm just in a bizarre place right now. I really feel like I need to grow up in Christ and I just feel so waited down by the areas that I struggle in. Spiritual warfare is a real thing and Hod has huge awesome plans that Satan doesn't like. I really need prayer right now. Especially for my heart. I still haven't healed from mistakes I've made and my heart really needs to be fixed on Jesus, it needs to be fiercely guarded.
It's kind of daunting sometimes to think of the person I know I can be. It feels like there are so many obstacles in the way. But church really hit me this week. When Craig made the point of how would your actions change if you wore a t-shirt that said I'm a Christian all the time. I can think of a lot. And I'm working on it. And it's by God's grace that I'll change, not my own effort. But oh this world is a difficult place to live some days.
But there is hope.
Jesus is my hero. He died for me so that I may have life with him, so that I may die to myself but be alive in him. It's precious and beautiful and I don't deserve it, but humbly I'll accept that precious gift.