Hey, guys, LOOK WHAT I FINISHED:
OH HAI, FREE MUSIC.
I present to you, after seriously like a month of promising it, THE WHITE COLLAR FANMIX.
Okay, well, uh. *A* White Collar fanmix, anyway. I managed to cut it down to 21 songs for this one, but I'm sure that I will, at some point, do this some more.
Some things everyone should know before they click on the cut:
1) I am a writer and a music lover and, ALAS, an absolute failure as an artist, so there is no cover art. Because I'm Doing it Wrong, but I'm also hooking you guys up with a bunch of awesome songs, so it comes out about even. Right? Right.
2) My grasp on the technology involved in doing this is probably not as good as it should be. LET ME KNOW IF YOU HAVE PROBLEMS :D
3) I have, um, reaaaaally eclectic music taste. If you come across a song in the .zip you don't like, delete it from your iTunes! But please do not play the "omg, my music is better than your music," game, I will choke a bitch. ALL MUSIC IS AWESOME, even if it not necessarily someone's cup of tea. I, for example, loathe Captain Beefheart, but I do not think less of you if you love him.
4) People who are not White Collar fans--all of these songs can be interpreted multiple ways, for multiple pairings. Feel free to throw a HP or SH pairing at me around a specific song, I'll write you a drabble for your trouble. And actually, WC folks, you're welcome to request song-based drabbles as well.
5) I am really sorry about all the Ani Difranco. I COULDN'T PICK BETWEEN THEM.
Alright, FORMALITIES OVER. It is now time for.... *drumroll*
Here it Goes Again; OK GO
It starts out easy, something simple, something sleazy,
something inching past the edge of the reserve.
Now through lines of the cheap venetian blinds
your car is pulling off of the curb.
Just when you think that you're in control,
just when you think that you've got a hold,
just when you get on a roll,
here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again.
This is the ultimate Neal/Peter chase song, for me. I listen to it every time I write a pre-series scene between the two of them.
Hearbreak Even; Ani Difranco
i feel you make love to me slightly
every time you let a little laugh slip too soon
and the moment passes over us so lightly
it feels like sand blowing over a dune
you try not to let your emotions show
but it ain't a balloon you can just let go
it's an ice cream cone dripping in the sun
sticky hands
sticky arms
sticky situation
And THIS is the ultimate Neal/Peter romance song. Just--wow. The whole piece revolves around the idea of complicated, messy, hidden love, and the pressure it causes. Is that not so them? And the tone of the song is unbelievably perfect. If I could vid, I'd be all up on this.
Snow is Gone; Josh Ritter
You were beautiful when I first saw your feathers and confectionery airs
The earth lit up and promised you the stars but you really didn't care
I sang in exultation, I pulled the stops--you always looked a little bored
But I'm singing for the love of it, have mercy on the man who sings to be adored
Hello blackbird, hello starling
Winter's over, be my darling
It's been a long time coming
But now the snow is gone
This song is Neal up until the end of the finale, thinking that he and Kate are going to make it. It's hopeful and excited and also clearly a little desperate, and it fits EXTREMELY well.
Freakshow; Ani Difranco
but underneath, there's another expression
that the makeup isn't making
life under the big top
it's about freedom
it's about faking
there's an art to the laughter
there's a science
and there's a lot of love and compliance
Neal and Kate and Moz as a criminal team, hiding behind their aliases and their motives, in love with the idea of being above normal life but also trapped by it, wrapped up in a big circus metaphor. AWESOME.
Checking My Pulse; Alix Olson
and now the space between these bodies
surpasses the sum of its parts
so I am crawling in-between these moments
balancing words hoping I don’t get stuck.
and I was thinking ‘distraction’
now I’m thinking distraction’s a relative thing
cause I was casually splashing
and now I’m a casualty sinking.
and in hot water, my brain just kinda puckers up
and I’m drowning jaws wide open now cause my mouth
it just won’t seem to shut
and you might just be a shiny thing
but you are the shiny thing I am pursuing
and when I said "you talk too much"
it was cause there was stuff I’d rather you’d have been doing.
Okay, this song is really more poetry than anything else. It also happens to work incredibly well for Neal/Peter (one of the many lines I did not include in this excerpt is "I’m sorry if you’re thinking that I knew what I was doing/I guess what I do best is look like I am in control"--I know, right?). And honestly, even if it didn't work for them, everyone should hear it. Because it's that full of win.
Nobody Knows Me At All; The Weepies
I don't give a damn, I'm happy as a clam, nobody knows me at all
Ah, what can you do? There's nobody like you, nobody knows me at all
I know how you feel, no secrets to reveal, nobody knows me at all
Very late at night and in the morning light, nobody knows me at all
JSFJKSLDJSJFJSLFJSFJKSLA NEAL IS THIS SONG THAT IS ALL.
You Don't Make it Easy, Babe; Josh Ritter
Your friends ask about me, you say I can be found
with the cheap romance novels with their spines battered down
oh the heart has no bones you say so it won’t break
but the purpose of loving is the pounding it takes
I’m trying hard to love you - you don’t make it easy babe
I’m trying hard to love you - I’m looking for an easy way
Again, a perfect Neal/Kate song, given my personal conception of Neal/Kate. The purpose of love is the pounding it takes...gah. It's the story of a man who wants desperately to love a woman who is just harder than he is, and it's beautiful.
I Want You; Rachael Yamagata
You simplified me down to slogans on the wall
I took offense, but you were right about them all
My friends are telling me I shouldn't waste my time
But I can't concentrate until I make you mine
I'm drawing cards and making wishes down by the well
Who would've known I'd lose myself in that old hotel?
Someday, I'm going to write the Neal/Peter pre-series fanfic that goes with the story of this song, which is essentially: two people meet in London, share a night together, and part ways. One of them is driven crazy by the memories. YOU SEE MY POINT HERE. Also, the artist is less well-known that I think she should be, and her vocals are un-fucking-believable.
A Mess to Be Made, The Format
In a dream that I can't seem to shake she is,
she is standing alone
by the fence I see tears in her eyes
why she cries, I just don't know
What a mess that I make of my days
then there's you,
you're a mess to be made
a mess to be made
the dream starts to fade away
This song...I see it as Neal, looking at the Kate situation and then at the Peter situation, and how fucked up and juxtaposed they are. Also, The Format is just straight up awesome.
Better Together, Jack Johnson
There's no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard
No song that I could sing, but I can try for your heart
Our dreams, and they are made out of real things
Like a shoebox of photographs with sepiatone loving
Yeah, I know, this is such a stereotypical love song. I don't care, because it is SO Peter and El, down to the box of surveillance photos (though I'm entirely certain that's not what Jack Johnson meant when he wrote it). Admittedly, the line With only two/just me and you gives my inner OT3 shipper some issues, but there aren't many love songs out there with the message "I love you, let's take on a committed third partner," now are there?
Love Turns 40; Vienna Teng
She's holding a secret that she'll never tell
She's holding a secret that she'll never tell
Because we were once cinema gods in the night
Now all we've got is lunch hour light
Where nothing photographs well
Don't go, she says, but he's sleeping
She says it to the dark
Don't go, she sees herself rising
Dressing in silence for nothing to lose
But something keeps you faithful
When all else in you turns and runs
Is Elizabeth leaving? Is Kate? Do you ignore the pronouns and stick Peter or Neal in there? IT DOESN'T MATTER. The overwhelming mournful loss and terror of this piece speaks so well to the tenuous subtext of the trust-based relationships that MAKE White Collar. A beautiful, beautiful piece of music.
If Work Permits, The Format
I'm standing in a room,
It's filled with older folk, they're pleading, "baby, listen"
And I scream as loud as anyone,
But when asked to make a point I tend to whisper
Now highways turn to tidal waves
They're asking me to export all of your insecurities
But that wind that blows across your room
It's gonna set the sails, and send me back to you
KSKOSFKS. Obsession--both with material wealth and with a lost love--and the tone and pacing of this song and just, gah. I LOVE IT SO MUCH I CANNOT EVEN EXPLAIN.
Sitting, Waiting, Wishing; Jack Johnson
I keep playing your part
But it's not my scene
Want this plot to twist
I've had enough mystery
Keep building it up
But then you're shooting me down
But I'm already down
Just wait a minute
Am I interpreting too many of these songs from Neal's POV? Oh, probably. That said, this is always playing when I'm writing or reading a scene involving Neal's supposedly-unrequited crush on Peter, because I really do think this is how he sees it--he's doing whatever he can and waiting around on it, but at some point he's going to have to cut his losses. An aching, lovely tune.
Criminal, Fiona Apple
I've been a bad, bad girl
I've been careless with a delicate man
And it's a sad, sad world
When a girl will break a boy just because she can...
What I need is a good defense
'Cause I'm feeling like a criminal
This song perfectly captures my own mental picture of Kate--someone who got in over her head and turned to the WRONG person to get out of it, and ended up becoming drawn in instead. Dirty and dark, and I've always loved Fiona Apple's voice.
Yours; Sara Gazarek
Dark days come in, bright ones go out
but you always make it better
People see it and I feel it
The love I have, baby it's yours
This song works a lot of ways; it could be Peter/El, or Peter/Neal, or Peter/Neal/El. It's just a straight up classy love song. The reason I've put it on this list is the style. It's got a very...I don't know, big voice, 1940's-gone-modern kind of feel to it. It fits with that undercurrent of old world class running through the show.
Brother Sport, Animal Collective
Open up your, open up your
Open up your throat
And let the all of that time
All of that time, all of that time go
So, there is a lot in this song that doesn't work, but a good portion of it involves them just singing the words "open up your throat" over and over and over. It is literally only on this mix because every time I hear it, I imagine Peter's face if he walked in on Neal singing that. Go on. Listen to this song and then imagine it. It's hilarious, isn't it? You're welcome.
People Got a Lotta Nerve, Neko Case
So the saying says, "An elephant never forgets"
Standing in the concrete cage
Swaying sad and insane
They walked over the ocean
Their dreams they dreamed awake
Until the lights grew dim, until the cop cars came
Everybody tells me this is crazy, yes, I know it
I'm a man, man, man, man, man, man eater
But still you're surprised-prised-prised when I eat ya
Oh, Kate. You are a man eater, aren't cha? But this is such an awesome groove that I forgive you. Also, the underlying concept here--you should have known better than to try and tame me--works on a number of levels for White Collar.
Oh No, Andrew Bird
so let's get out of here
past the atmosphere
squint your eyes and no one dies
or goes to jail
past the silver bridge, oh the silver bridge
wearing nothing but a onesie and a veil
oh oh deep in a mine,
oh oh a calcium mine
arm and arm we are the harmless sociopaths
This is a song about secrets and how they eat at you (the calcium mines buried deep in your chest), and how because of that, everyone is a little crazy. Harmless sociopaths, indeed. OH COMMENTARY, I MEANT YOU TO BE MORE COHERENT THAN THIS.
Subterranean Homesick Blues, Bob Dylan
Look out kid, you’re gonna get hit
By users, cheaters, six-time losers
Hang around the theaters
Girl by the whirlpool's looking for a new fool
Don’t follow leaders and watch the parking meters
Is there a better Mozzie song than this, folks? Bob Dylan, rambling along in his crazed, brilliant way about conspiracy and how it gets everyone in the end, no matter what they do. Can't you just imagine Mozzie holed up in his storage locker, feeling like a cliche as he plays this song over and over on his old record player? Because man, I can.
The Hollows; Why?
As I lay me down to fall asleep
With my demons dying and my pilot light weak
I curse the last six months I been hiding behind a mustache, yeah
And to those last ten years I been howling a paper moon: fuck you
This goes out to all my underdone, under-tongue, lung long frontmen
(This is what the ghost of someone's dad says)
And all us earth growths, some planted
And some pulled
(Shut up and put your money where your mouth is)
Ah, look. Some of you...are not going to like this song. In fact, many of you are probably not going to like this song. Why? is a band with an incredibly unique style, and while they're brilliant, they're also, uh. Fairly vulgar? I mean that in the sense of language and theme and also that this is raw, unusual music, bordering on rap in some places. I will not judge you if you do not like this song! So please do not judge me for liking it. You can feel free to delete it if it is not your cup of tea.
That said, I really do think it does a great job of hitting on the darker sides of Neal's thoughts about prison, and by and large it's a very well-written piece. Why?'s lyrics are their strength and mannnnnn, the words of this song--not include in this excerpt is the line But no one finds God and then goes to prison, and I don't know. I haven't written much fic about Neal's time in jail but it's not because I haven't thought about, and this captures the gritty underside of Neal's smooth reality.
As Is, Ani Difranco
you can't hide behind social graces
so don't try to be all touchy feely
cuz you lie in my face of all places
but i've got no problem with that really
what bugs me is that you believe what you're saying
what bothers me is that you don't know how you feel
what scares me is that while you're telling me stories
you actually believe that they are real
and i've got no illusions about you
and guess what? i never did
and when i said, when i said i'll take it
i meant, i meant as is
Yeah, that's too much to quote back. And yeah, there are too many Ani songs on this fanmix. I don't care--this song is closing out this list because I can't think of anything that better sums up how Peter feels about Neal. I'd go into it, but honestly, these lyrics speak for themselves.
Download it here, folks.
I present to you, after seriously like a month of promising it, THE WHITE COLLAR FANMIX.
Okay, well, uh. *A* White Collar fanmix, anyway. I managed to cut it down to 21 songs for this one, but I'm sure that I will, at some point, do this some more.
Some things everyone should know before they click on the cut:
1) I am a writer and a music lover and, ALAS, an absolute failure as an artist, so there is no cover art. Because I'm Doing it Wrong, but I'm also hooking you guys up with a bunch of awesome songs, so it comes out about even. Right? Right.
2) My grasp on the technology involved in doing this is probably not as good as it should be. LET ME KNOW IF YOU HAVE PROBLEMS :D
3) I have, um, reaaaaally eclectic music taste. If you come across a song in the .zip you don't like, delete it from your iTunes! But please do not play the "omg, my music is better than your music," game, I will choke a bitch. ALL MUSIC IS AWESOME, even if it not necessarily someone's cup of tea. I, for example, loathe Captain Beefheart, but I do not think less of you if you love him.
4) People who are not White Collar fans--all of these songs can be interpreted multiple ways, for multiple pairings. Feel free to throw a HP or SH pairing at me around a specific song, I'll write you a drabble for your trouble. And actually, WC folks, you're welcome to request song-based drabbles as well.
5) I am really sorry about all the Ani Difranco. I COULDN'T PICK BETWEEN THEM.
Alright, FORMALITIES OVER. It is now time for.... *drumroll*
Here it Goes Again; OK GO
It starts out easy, something simple, something sleazy,
something inching past the edge of the reserve.
Now through lines of the cheap venetian blinds
your car is pulling off of the curb.
Just when you think that you're in control,
just when you think that you've got a hold,
just when you get on a roll,
here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again.
This is the ultimate Neal/Peter chase song, for me. I listen to it every time I write a pre-series scene between the two of them.
Hearbreak Even; Ani Difranco
i feel you make love to me slightly
every time you let a little laugh slip too soon
and the moment passes over us so lightly
it feels like sand blowing over a dune
you try not to let your emotions show
but it ain't a balloon you can just let go
it's an ice cream cone dripping in the sun
sticky hands
sticky arms
sticky situation
And THIS is the ultimate Neal/Peter romance song. Just--wow. The whole piece revolves around the idea of complicated, messy, hidden love, and the pressure it causes. Is that not so them? And the tone of the song is unbelievably perfect. If I could vid, I'd be all up on this.
Snow is Gone; Josh Ritter
You were beautiful when I first saw your feathers and confectionery airs
The earth lit up and promised you the stars but you really didn't care
I sang in exultation, I pulled the stops--you always looked a little bored
But I'm singing for the love of it, have mercy on the man who sings to be adored
Hello blackbird, hello starling
Winter's over, be my darling
It's been a long time coming
But now the snow is gone
This song is Neal up until the end of the finale, thinking that he and Kate are going to make it. It's hopeful and excited and also clearly a little desperate, and it fits EXTREMELY well.
Freakshow; Ani Difranco
but underneath, there's another expression
that the makeup isn't making
life under the big top
it's about freedom
it's about faking
there's an art to the laughter
there's a science
and there's a lot of love and compliance
Neal and Kate and Moz as a criminal team, hiding behind their aliases and their motives, in love with the idea of being above normal life but also trapped by it, wrapped up in a big circus metaphor. AWESOME.
Checking My Pulse; Alix Olson
and now the space between these bodies
surpasses the sum of its parts
so I am crawling in-between these moments
balancing words hoping I don’t get stuck.
and I was thinking ‘distraction’
now I’m thinking distraction’s a relative thing
cause I was casually splashing
and now I’m a casualty sinking.
and in hot water, my brain just kinda puckers up
and I’m drowning jaws wide open now cause my mouth
it just won’t seem to shut
and you might just be a shiny thing
but you are the shiny thing I am pursuing
and when I said "you talk too much"
it was cause there was stuff I’d rather you’d have been doing.
Okay, this song is really more poetry than anything else. It also happens to work incredibly well for Neal/Peter (one of the many lines I did not include in this excerpt is "I’m sorry if you’re thinking that I knew what I was doing/I guess what I do best is look like I am in control"--I know, right?). And honestly, even if it didn't work for them, everyone should hear it. Because it's that full of win.
Nobody Knows Me At All; The Weepies
I don't give a damn, I'm happy as a clam, nobody knows me at all
Ah, what can you do? There's nobody like you, nobody knows me at all
I know how you feel, no secrets to reveal, nobody knows me at all
Very late at night and in the morning light, nobody knows me at all
JSFJKSLDJSJFJSLFJSFJKSLA NEAL IS THIS SONG THAT IS ALL.
You Don't Make it Easy, Babe; Josh Ritter
Your friends ask about me, you say I can be found
with the cheap romance novels with their spines battered down
oh the heart has no bones you say so it won’t break
but the purpose of loving is the pounding it takes
I’m trying hard to love you - you don’t make it easy babe
I’m trying hard to love you - I’m looking for an easy way
Again, a perfect Neal/Kate song, given my personal conception of Neal/Kate. The purpose of love is the pounding it takes...gah. It's the story of a man who wants desperately to love a woman who is just harder than he is, and it's beautiful.
I Want You; Rachael Yamagata
You simplified me down to slogans on the wall
I took offense, but you were right about them all
My friends are telling me I shouldn't waste my time
But I can't concentrate until I make you mine
I'm drawing cards and making wishes down by the well
Who would've known I'd lose myself in that old hotel?
Someday, I'm going to write the Neal/Peter pre-series fanfic that goes with the story of this song, which is essentially: two people meet in London, share a night together, and part ways. One of them is driven crazy by the memories. YOU SEE MY POINT HERE. Also, the artist is less well-known that I think she should be, and her vocals are un-fucking-believable.
A Mess to Be Made, The Format
In a dream that I can't seem to shake she is,
she is standing alone
by the fence I see tears in her eyes
why she cries, I just don't know
What a mess that I make of my days
then there's you,
you're a mess to be made
a mess to be made
the dream starts to fade away
This song...I see it as Neal, looking at the Kate situation and then at the Peter situation, and how fucked up and juxtaposed they are. Also, The Format is just straight up awesome.
Better Together, Jack Johnson
There's no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard
No song that I could sing, but I can try for your heart
Our dreams, and they are made out of real things
Like a shoebox of photographs with sepiatone loving
Yeah, I know, this is such a stereotypical love song. I don't care, because it is SO Peter and El, down to the box of surveillance photos (though I'm entirely certain that's not what Jack Johnson meant when he wrote it). Admittedly, the line With only two/just me and you gives my inner OT3 shipper some issues, but there aren't many love songs out there with the message "I love you, let's take on a committed third partner," now are there?
Love Turns 40; Vienna Teng
She's holding a secret that she'll never tell
She's holding a secret that she'll never tell
Because we were once cinema gods in the night
Now all we've got is lunch hour light
Where nothing photographs well
Don't go, she says, but he's sleeping
She says it to the dark
Don't go, she sees herself rising
Dressing in silence for nothing to lose
But something keeps you faithful
When all else in you turns and runs
Is Elizabeth leaving? Is Kate? Do you ignore the pronouns and stick Peter or Neal in there? IT DOESN'T MATTER. The overwhelming mournful loss and terror of this piece speaks so well to the tenuous subtext of the trust-based relationships that MAKE White Collar. A beautiful, beautiful piece of music.
If Work Permits, The Format
I'm standing in a room,
It's filled with older folk, they're pleading, "baby, listen"
And I scream as loud as anyone,
But when asked to make a point I tend to whisper
Now highways turn to tidal waves
They're asking me to export all of your insecurities
But that wind that blows across your room
It's gonna set the sails, and send me back to you
KSKOSFKS. Obsession--both with material wealth and with a lost love--and the tone and pacing of this song and just, gah. I LOVE IT SO MUCH I CANNOT EVEN EXPLAIN.
Sitting, Waiting, Wishing; Jack Johnson
I keep playing your part
But it's not my scene
Want this plot to twist
I've had enough mystery
Keep building it up
But then you're shooting me down
But I'm already down
Just wait a minute
Am I interpreting too many of these songs from Neal's POV? Oh, probably. That said, this is always playing when I'm writing or reading a scene involving Neal's supposedly-unrequited crush on Peter, because I really do think this is how he sees it--he's doing whatever he can and waiting around on it, but at some point he's going to have to cut his losses. An aching, lovely tune.
Criminal, Fiona Apple
I've been a bad, bad girl
I've been careless with a delicate man
And it's a sad, sad world
When a girl will break a boy just because she can...
What I need is a good defense
'Cause I'm feeling like a criminal
This song perfectly captures my own mental picture of Kate--someone who got in over her head and turned to the WRONG person to get out of it, and ended up becoming drawn in instead. Dirty and dark, and I've always loved Fiona Apple's voice.
Yours; Sara Gazarek
Dark days come in, bright ones go out
but you always make it better
People see it and I feel it
The love I have, baby it's yours
This song works a lot of ways; it could be Peter/El, or Peter/Neal, or Peter/Neal/El. It's just a straight up classy love song. The reason I've put it on this list is the style. It's got a very...I don't know, big voice, 1940's-gone-modern kind of feel to it. It fits with that undercurrent of old world class running through the show.
Brother Sport, Animal Collective
Open up your, open up your
Open up your throat
And let the all of that time
All of that time, all of that time go
So, there is a lot in this song that doesn't work, but a good portion of it involves them just singing the words "open up your throat" over and over and over. It is literally only on this mix because every time I hear it, I imagine Peter's face if he walked in on Neal singing that. Go on. Listen to this song and then imagine it. It's hilarious, isn't it? You're welcome.
People Got a Lotta Nerve, Neko Case
So the saying says, "An elephant never forgets"
Standing in the concrete cage
Swaying sad and insane
They walked over the ocean
Their dreams they dreamed awake
Until the lights grew dim, until the cop cars came
Everybody tells me this is crazy, yes, I know it
I'm a man, man, man, man, man, man eater
But still you're surprised-prised-prised when I eat ya
Oh, Kate. You are a man eater, aren't cha? But this is such an awesome groove that I forgive you. Also, the underlying concept here--you should have known better than to try and tame me--works on a number of levels for White Collar.
Oh No, Andrew Bird
so let's get out of here
past the atmosphere
squint your eyes and no one dies
or goes to jail
past the silver bridge, oh the silver bridge
wearing nothing but a onesie and a veil
oh oh deep in a mine,
oh oh a calcium mine
arm and arm we are the harmless sociopaths
This is a song about secrets and how they eat at you (the calcium mines buried deep in your chest), and how because of that, everyone is a little crazy. Harmless sociopaths, indeed. OH COMMENTARY, I MEANT YOU TO BE MORE COHERENT THAN THIS.
Subterranean Homesick Blues, Bob Dylan
Look out kid, you’re gonna get hit
By users, cheaters, six-time losers
Hang around the theaters
Girl by the whirlpool's looking for a new fool
Don’t follow leaders and watch the parking meters
Is there a better Mozzie song than this, folks? Bob Dylan, rambling along in his crazed, brilliant way about conspiracy and how it gets everyone in the end, no matter what they do. Can't you just imagine Mozzie holed up in his storage locker, feeling like a cliche as he plays this song over and over on his old record player? Because man, I can.
The Hollows; Why?
As I lay me down to fall asleep
With my demons dying and my pilot light weak
I curse the last six months I been hiding behind a mustache, yeah
And to those last ten years I been howling a paper moon: fuck you
This goes out to all my underdone, under-tongue, lung long frontmen
(This is what the ghost of someone's dad says)
And all us earth growths, some planted
And some pulled
(Shut up and put your money where your mouth is)
Ah, look. Some of you...are not going to like this song. In fact, many of you are probably not going to like this song. Why? is a band with an incredibly unique style, and while they're brilliant, they're also, uh. Fairly vulgar? I mean that in the sense of language and theme and also that this is raw, unusual music, bordering on rap in some places. I will not judge you if you do not like this song! So please do not judge me for liking it. You can feel free to delete it if it is not your cup of tea.
That said, I really do think it does a great job of hitting on the darker sides of Neal's thoughts about prison, and by and large it's a very well-written piece. Why?'s lyrics are their strength and mannnnnn, the words of this song--not include in this excerpt is the line But no one finds God and then goes to prison, and I don't know. I haven't written much fic about Neal's time in jail but it's not because I haven't thought about, and this captures the gritty underside of Neal's smooth reality.
As Is, Ani Difranco
you can't hide behind social graces
so don't try to be all touchy feely
cuz you lie in my face of all places
but i've got no problem with that really
what bugs me is that you believe what you're saying
what bothers me is that you don't know how you feel
what scares me is that while you're telling me stories
you actually believe that they are real
and i've got no illusions about you
and guess what? i never did
and when i said, when i said i'll take it
i meant, i meant as is
Yeah, that's too much to quote back. And yeah, there are too many Ani songs on this fanmix. I don't care--this song is closing out this list because I can't think of anything that better sums up how Peter feels about Neal. I'd go into it, but honestly, these lyrics speak for themselves.
Download it here, folks.