Freedom of thought
I got done with my classes today around 1:20 pm...
I went to get coffee, mulling over the massive amount of writing i have today, and plethora of time i have to do it, as long as i can stay on track. Heh,..right :D
As i reached for the coffee, i was thinking about a conversation about relationships i heard going on when i entered the classroom. It was more specifically about morality. I am not talking about love relationships here, I am talking about the basic give and take, thought and judgement. They were discussing sin, and the human mind. I have been thinking about this a lot,..and as I reached for my coffee, something snapped in my head, and i giggled.
I added sugar, and i giggled.
I added the cream,..and i smiled deeply to myself and the thought rotating over and over in my overly worked monkey mind....
"The only way to be trully be moral, is to be completly amoral" So simple, and so beautifully recieved.
I walked over to the bus station and my Buddhist classmate was standing there. I stopped and we greeted each other. I said,.."don't you ove it when you are doing something simple and your mind catches on something and implodes?" She giggled and said "what was this?" I said,..."The only way to be trully moral, is to be completely amoral" She smirked and said,.."Ya,...kind of trippy huh?" I said, "makes a lot of sense though,...if you have no morality, you can't pass judgement. If the truest expression of morality is unconditional love, there is not room for the others. NO room for right and wrong. These concepts create divides, foster judgement and do not allow us to fully accept each other. To accept someone is to love them. To love them is to show them respect. The most honest form of respect is honoring the person that they are. If we had had no right and wrong,..there would be no stealing, there would be no lying, there would be no need to cheat, or to express our needs in unconstructive ways." She smiled,...i said "DO you ever have momments when these things make so much sense you feel like you are going insane?"
She hugged me.
We talked for a while on the bus. We discussed how Taoism would be totally in line with this, and that the Tao really is at the center of everything, even though it really is the least well known philosophy. I told her about my professor of asian studies encouraging me to look into going to a buddhist retreat. So i can help my body catch up with my mind. (the body having a consciousness of its own, and having a more difficult time keeping up due to its ingrained system of habits and rituals. I guess if you have something satturated in matter it tends to follow the rules of attachment. Heh...may be exercizing and Tai Chi ae just what we need to keep these things intergrated)
Anyway, she was very excited about this and encouraging. As she left she said "Gwen, i love how you mind thinks" I think that was the best compliment i have ever gotten. I live in my mind, what happens there is personal to me.
I got home and no one was waiting for me. Ah,..release. I don't have anyone to answer to. I don't have to tell anyone what I am thinking. I dont have to explain myself, and i don't have to negotiate. Awesome. I layed down, and thought about other this, and realized how important it is that we have a sense of ourselves. How important it is to have room for freedom of thought. How important it is that we have a mastery of our minds, and the room to develop our own opinions. I love it when people have thoughts of their own. I am encouraging of questions and other point of views,..I often pressent myself very strongly when i am heavily engaged in conversation about them but this is to create enough tension to encourage mommentum of thought and anylytical processing. I asked myself in this momment of exquisite solitude "what would have happened if i had said that to anyone else? SOmeone not Buddhist, someone not familiar with eastern logic,..would they have responded as openly?" NO,..they would not have, and they probably would have followed the rejection with a sharp about face in conversation or a badly formed arguement. *shaking head* And 10 to one in my favor,..if i asked them WHY they felt that way,..there would have been nothing but ungrounded rhetoric they picked up from some Tv show, primp and posturing know it all friend, or mainstream mind numbing monologue punctuated by variences of the words sin, evil, and law.
*yawn*
DOn't tell me shit until you have been there,..until that happens you are all hypothesis, and that's about as usefull as a bag full of hot air.
NOw you ask,..how is it YOU can say anything about this? I am there folks. I am sinning all over the place, and due to my low moral status i am able to really listen to those still swimming in in the trenches un biasedly. How is it I can say anything somewhat negatively about the moral side? I gave been there. I judged and still at times do judge. I was MUCH MUCH worse several years ago. While my hands were clean, my mind focused on what was right and wrong, my mouth filled with distinctions and my eyes scanning for the differences between myself and others,....I was miserable,..i was ugly,...and i created a lot of suffering for myself and others. Yes,..it helped me function more efficiently among the "moral elite" but i am telling you now,..scratch the pure surfaces and we are still made of dirt underneath.
This year,..i am going to stip myself down further. I am going to expose myself to the unseemly,..i am going to face what is ugly, polluted and seemingly insane. I dont want my towers,..i want to be useless and remain so while to world suffers and struggles around me. If you are useless to society,..you have more freedom to live as you please. What i want in my life is vividly different that our cultures ideal lifestyle for the average american homeowner. *breathing deeply* My goal? Unconditional love.
Here is to a rich life on the outskirts of what others judge proper, or important.
I went to get coffee, mulling over the massive amount of writing i have today, and plethora of time i have to do it, as long as i can stay on track. Heh,..right :D
As i reached for the coffee, i was thinking about a conversation about relationships i heard going on when i entered the classroom. It was more specifically about morality. I am not talking about love relationships here, I am talking about the basic give and take, thought and judgement. They were discussing sin, and the human mind. I have been thinking about this a lot,..and as I reached for my coffee, something snapped in my head, and i giggled.
I added sugar, and i giggled.
I added the cream,..and i smiled deeply to myself and the thought rotating over and over in my overly worked monkey mind....
"The only way to be trully be moral, is to be completly amoral" So simple, and so beautifully recieved.
I walked over to the bus station and my Buddhist classmate was standing there. I stopped and we greeted each other. I said,.."don't you ove it when you are doing something simple and your mind catches on something and implodes?" She giggled and said "what was this?" I said,..."The only way to be trully moral, is to be completely amoral" She smirked and said,.."Ya,...kind of trippy huh?" I said, "makes a lot of sense though,...if you have no morality, you can't pass judgement. If the truest expression of morality is unconditional love, there is not room for the others. NO room for right and wrong. These concepts create divides, foster judgement and do not allow us to fully accept each other. To accept someone is to love them. To love them is to show them respect. The most honest form of respect is honoring the person that they are. If we had had no right and wrong,..there would be no stealing, there would be no lying, there would be no need to cheat, or to express our needs in unconstructive ways." She smiled,...i said "DO you ever have momments when these things make so much sense you feel like you are going insane?"
She hugged me.
We talked for a while on the bus. We discussed how Taoism would be totally in line with this, and that the Tao really is at the center of everything, even though it really is the least well known philosophy. I told her about my professor of asian studies encouraging me to look into going to a buddhist retreat. So i can help my body catch up with my mind. (the body having a consciousness of its own, and having a more difficult time keeping up due to its ingrained system of habits and rituals. I guess if you have something satturated in matter it tends to follow the rules of attachment. Heh...may be exercizing and Tai Chi ae just what we need to keep these things intergrated)
Anyway, she was very excited about this and encouraging. As she left she said "Gwen, i love how you mind thinks" I think that was the best compliment i have ever gotten. I live in my mind, what happens there is personal to me.
I got home and no one was waiting for me. Ah,..release. I don't have anyone to answer to. I don't have to tell anyone what I am thinking. I dont have to explain myself, and i don't have to negotiate. Awesome. I layed down, and thought about other this, and realized how important it is that we have a sense of ourselves. How important it is to have room for freedom of thought. How important it is that we have a mastery of our minds, and the room to develop our own opinions. I love it when people have thoughts of their own. I am encouraging of questions and other point of views,..I often pressent myself very strongly when i am heavily engaged in conversation about them but this is to create enough tension to encourage mommentum of thought and anylytical processing. I asked myself in this momment of exquisite solitude "what would have happened if i had said that to anyone else? SOmeone not Buddhist, someone not familiar with eastern logic,..would they have responded as openly?" NO,..they would not have, and they probably would have followed the rejection with a sharp about face in conversation or a badly formed arguement. *shaking head* And 10 to one in my favor,..if i asked them WHY they felt that way,..there would have been nothing but ungrounded rhetoric they picked up from some Tv show, primp and posturing know it all friend, or mainstream mind numbing monologue punctuated by variences of the words sin, evil, and law.
*yawn*
DOn't tell me shit until you have been there,..until that happens you are all hypothesis, and that's about as usefull as a bag full of hot air.
NOw you ask,..how is it YOU can say anything about this? I am there folks. I am sinning all over the place, and due to my low moral status i am able to really listen to those still swimming in in the trenches un biasedly. How is it I can say anything somewhat negatively about the moral side? I gave been there. I judged and still at times do judge. I was MUCH MUCH worse several years ago. While my hands were clean, my mind focused on what was right and wrong, my mouth filled with distinctions and my eyes scanning for the differences between myself and others,....I was miserable,..i was ugly,...and i created a lot of suffering for myself and others. Yes,..it helped me function more efficiently among the "moral elite" but i am telling you now,..scratch the pure surfaces and we are still made of dirt underneath.
This year,..i am going to stip myself down further. I am going to expose myself to the unseemly,..i am going to face what is ugly, polluted and seemingly insane. I dont want my towers,..i want to be useless and remain so while to world suffers and struggles around me. If you are useless to society,..you have more freedom to live as you please. What i want in my life is vividly different that our cultures ideal lifestyle for the average american homeowner. *breathing deeply* My goal? Unconditional love.
Here is to a rich life on the outskirts of what others judge proper, or important.