Been a while, I'll try to make this decent.
I haven't written in livejournal for quite a while, and even when I have, I don't have much I feel like typing about.
I suppose that I've gotten lazier in ways, but more productive in other areas of my life.
Perhaps if I simply start writing in the stream of consciousness style I will have something fun and more importantly honest to get out of my chest :)
It's about 3:10 in the morning, I'd just smoked a bit and now I'm trying to figure out what exactly I want to do. Sleep, although the most logical option, is last on my list of stuff I'd like to do at this time , other options include World of Warcraft.
World of Warcraft is so addicting. I was right to stay away from it at first when I had heard about it and seen what it did to people. What I had gotten myself into was pretty much a great way to blow off some steam and have fun with other nerds. One of my new good friends Kiley, plays a lot with me.
After I transferred the location of my job closer to my home, I started hanging out with Kiley a lot because she works with me and it's easy to just meet up after work and chill. Her house is big with comfy couches and a huge tv so often times we, being myself, Kiley, her boyfriend Mark, and Andrea (another new good friend) will hang out. I especially love hanging out with my new friends because they are so much like minded to myself and are very hospitable. Kiley or Andrea will often call to invite me over for dinner, and I can rarely refuse, for good company, and good food!
It is very comforting to have good friends close by at times when sometimes I feel overwhelmed by stress and anxiety. In my family, there is a lot to be concerned about at the moment, so everybody is on edge and exhausted. My grandfather will likely die within a month, I'm no doctor, but I do know he has what doctors have explained to be a lung tumor, a hernia, and emphysema, and he's apparently been given doctors orders to no longer receive nutrition orally. This saddens me greatly. I look up to my grandfather Giovanni Luigi more than anybody else I know. To me, he exemplifies what good, and just are. He did, and does, what good, and just, and caring men do. I hope one day I will have great courage like my grandfather had all of his life. To not be afraid to do what is right no matter how hard it is. I wish there was something I could do to make him better, to cure of him his great ailment. If there were a secret flower, or forgotten idol, that could save him... These thoughts, absurd as they are, occupy my mind at all hours of the day...
I find it more and more difficult to concentrate at times. I find myself twitching and becoming very self conscious. I think the more paranoid I become, the better I am at hiding it. It's easier to distract myself than to think about what really bothers me and what I should do about it. I already feel better having written this far, my hands have stopped shaking.
I ...
Got a haircut, had my car tuned up, became flat broke, opened up another savings account, made some appointments, and have worked my ass off lately. Tomorrow being my day off, I think it a good idea to get some sleep, and wake early enough to enjoy it.
If you bothered to read this,
Thanks.
I suppose that I've gotten lazier in ways, but more productive in other areas of my life.
Perhaps if I simply start writing in the stream of consciousness style I will have something fun and more importantly honest to get out of my chest :)
It's about 3:10 in the morning, I'd just smoked a bit and now I'm trying to figure out what exactly I want to do. Sleep, although the most logical option, is last on my list of stuff I'd like to do at this time , other options include World of Warcraft.
World of Warcraft is so addicting. I was right to stay away from it at first when I had heard about it and seen what it did to people. What I had gotten myself into was pretty much a great way to blow off some steam and have fun with other nerds. One of my new good friends Kiley, plays a lot with me.
After I transferred the location of my job closer to my home, I started hanging out with Kiley a lot because she works with me and it's easy to just meet up after work and chill. Her house is big with comfy couches and a huge tv so often times we, being myself, Kiley, her boyfriend Mark, and Andrea (another new good friend) will hang out. I especially love hanging out with my new friends because they are so much like minded to myself and are very hospitable. Kiley or Andrea will often call to invite me over for dinner, and I can rarely refuse, for good company, and good food!
It is very comforting to have good friends close by at times when sometimes I feel overwhelmed by stress and anxiety. In my family, there is a lot to be concerned about at the moment, so everybody is on edge and exhausted. My grandfather will likely die within a month, I'm no doctor, but I do know he has what doctors have explained to be a lung tumor, a hernia, and emphysema, and he's apparently been given doctors orders to no longer receive nutrition orally. This saddens me greatly. I look up to my grandfather Giovanni Luigi more than anybody else I know. To me, he exemplifies what good, and just are. He did, and does, what good, and just, and caring men do. I hope one day I will have great courage like my grandfather had all of his life. To not be afraid to do what is right no matter how hard it is. I wish there was something I could do to make him better, to cure of him his great ailment. If there were a secret flower, or forgotten idol, that could save him... These thoughts, absurd as they are, occupy my mind at all hours of the day...
I find it more and more difficult to concentrate at times. I find myself twitching and becoming very self conscious. I think the more paranoid I become, the better I am at hiding it. It's easier to distract myself than to think about what really bothers me and what I should do about it. I already feel better having written this far, my hands have stopped shaking.
I ...
Got a haircut, had my car tuned up, became flat broke, opened up another savings account, made some appointments, and have worked my ass off lately. Tomorrow being my day off, I think it a good idea to get some sleep, and wake early enough to enjoy it.
If you bothered to read this,
Thanks.