i dont understand

[guineverenikole]

i wrote about it. its OUT. so why is it still plagueing my body.
i wrote about class, i wrote in my "Fuck you book" about the other thins bothering me.
so why wont this go away?
i knwo the answer.
im not ready to surrender to it all.
im not ready to deal with it properly
and i know it will grow and repeat repeat repeat itself until i do
i just need the tools, i dont have the tools.
maybe once i sleep i will feel better inthe morning
i need to talk to liza about this
i think it might be time to surrender to all of this
because i dont have the option of cutting all connections to these people
my god do i hate this
not only because i dont feel in control
but because i feel like i lose if i surrender
i feel like i hand the power over to the select peopel i resent right now.
i just need to cry
i guess this means im one of the weak ones? huh, mr giordano?

fuck you all.