Anzety Mahrassa's Diary.
Got bored, and inspired by atriciously bad but extremely funny stargate fanfiction. Somehow seems appriopriate to Anzety. It shall be updated perodically.
24th July, 2007.
Units of Alcohol:- 3.
Cookie Dough Ice Cream - ¼ pint.
Inappropriate thoughts:- lost count.
1:31 am.
I’ve decided to start a diary of my thoughts and crazy ideas, also using said diary as a place to keep track of the do’s and do not’s of my life for personal reference. On the lists of DO NOT’S would be watching Family Guy at 1:30 in the morning and deciding to keep a brand spanking new diary. These sorts of revelations should happen on New Year ’s Day, like all normal people who decide they are going to keep diaries. And reach new turning points in the lives. SO in conclusion, my outline for the next year or so of do’s and do not’s.
1) I will maintain an air of professionalism at my job. I will not get exasperated with my patients, no matter how much I am related to them, want to do horrifically lewd things to their OH SO lovely stomach, or no matter how much they remind me how infinitely clever they are. I shall be caring, clever, Mr Fantastic Bedside Manner and shall resist temptations at attempts to be Mr Fantastic in Bed with a certain archaeologist under my care.
2) I shall not call blond Californian surgeons at crazy hours of the night out of curiosity. Then pine when I discover he was curious about what I was doing.
3) Shall not rely on tall lanky redheads for sexual satisfaction - one is involved with small attractive pouting blond, other is fixated on tall lanky, multi pierced Goth who may be doing my baby brother. No matter how well either happen to fulfil wanton sexual desire.
4) …..Will stop wondering if Max and Fall *have* done the dirty, Fall is pure and untouched. Therefore they can’t have. ‘Sides, Max is the hetero one.
5) Will stop being paranoid about my height and focus on fabulously sexy tush instead.
6) Will stop taking offence when certain water incubus makes comments about never being on top because of height. But will carry on smacking any prick, male or female, who ever uses the word “uke” or “seme” in my presence.
7) Will stop approaching Daniel on his blind side. While his screaming like a girl is thoroughly amusing, his tendency to aim for below the crotch is not.
8) Will overcome fear of woman’s bits. With help of sassy burlesque dancer.
9) Will stop making lists of things to do.
10) Especially at ten to two in the morning.
4am.
Gave in and called Zimon at about three in the morning. Curse his irritatingly attractive “I’m far away and blond and you know my fluttering brown eyes were dozing in that delicious way that makes you want to explore every inch of my tanned Californian surfer skin even though you can’t do anything about it.”
Also, curse his bastard attitude in insisting remaining friends. Don’t want to be friends. Would much rather be living in steady relationship bliss with his expert neuro-surgeon hands doing what they do best in the UK, rather than in smelly USA.
415am.
Fall had a nightmare so crawled into my bed, thus squashing my plans of calling Ash and making suggestive comments down the phone and using his amused giggles and no doubt equally suggestive comments to work self into a wankathon that would leave me thoroughly exhausted and asleep. Took half sleeping pill instead. Hopefully Z’s will kick in shortly.
9am.
Why didn’t I take the sleeping pill at 1130? Groggy and still slightly drowsy from self medication, but enjoying a breakfast of bran flakes and Nicki’s exposed stomach across the table from me. He has a coffee and an archaeology journal and an open shirt. Being woken by Fall’s frantic need for pancakes at 8am was well worth it.
7pm.
Hectic day. Anton’s physiotherapy is not progressing well because he refuses to let Daniel touch him to measure up a better prosthetic limb. Had to growl at him into submission with threats of fetching Dr. Octavius and a rectal examination. That woman is fixated with bums. More so than yours truly.
Fall had a brief, sociopathic fit when he couldn’t find his black and white jumper. He had to wear it, absolutely. It was one of his funny turns but was easily resolved when I pulled it out the dryer all warm and snugly. He was suitably placated for the day which left me free to pursue other methods of entertainment - mainly a red hair archaeologist who was covered in mud.
He’s decided to start landscaping the garden. I have no issues with this, although I think the management may protest when his landscaping ends up with just a great big hole in the garden. Bless him, his eyes all lit up when he dug up a bone next doors dog had buried. He washed it in the sink and everything. Somehow get the impression he misses field work. Had an odd moment when he didn’t realise he had mud on his face and instead of wiping it off himself he asked me to do. Curse him.
9pm.
Must stop obsessively writing in diary, only had the bloody thing a day and keep trying to think of witty comments to throw in. Who the hell is going to be reading this anyway?
24th July, 2007.
Units of Alcohol:- 3.
Cookie Dough Ice Cream - ¼ pint.
Inappropriate thoughts:- lost count.
1:31 am.
I’ve decided to start a diary of my thoughts and crazy ideas, also using said diary as a place to keep track of the do’s and do not’s of my life for personal reference. On the lists of DO NOT’S would be watching Family Guy at 1:30 in the morning and deciding to keep a brand spanking new diary. These sorts of revelations should happen on New Year ’s Day, like all normal people who decide they are going to keep diaries. And reach new turning points in the lives. SO in conclusion, my outline for the next year or so of do’s and do not’s.
1) I will maintain an air of professionalism at my job. I will not get exasperated with my patients, no matter how much I am related to them, want to do horrifically lewd things to their OH SO lovely stomach, or no matter how much they remind me how infinitely clever they are. I shall be caring, clever, Mr Fantastic Bedside Manner and shall resist temptations at attempts to be Mr Fantastic in Bed with a certain archaeologist under my care.
2) I shall not call blond Californian surgeons at crazy hours of the night out of curiosity. Then pine when I discover he was curious about what I was doing.
3) Shall not rely on tall lanky redheads for sexual satisfaction - one is involved with small attractive pouting blond, other is fixated on tall lanky, multi pierced Goth who may be doing my baby brother. No matter how well either happen to fulfil wanton sexual desire.
4) …..Will stop wondering if Max and Fall *have* done the dirty, Fall is pure and untouched. Therefore they can’t have. ‘Sides, Max is the hetero one.
5) Will stop being paranoid about my height and focus on fabulously sexy tush instead.
6) Will stop taking offence when certain water incubus makes comments about never being on top because of height. But will carry on smacking any prick, male or female, who ever uses the word “uke” or “seme” in my presence.
7) Will stop approaching Daniel on his blind side. While his screaming like a girl is thoroughly amusing, his tendency to aim for below the crotch is not.
8) Will overcome fear of woman’s bits. With help of sassy burlesque dancer.
9) Will stop making lists of things to do.
10) Especially at ten to two in the morning.
4am.
Gave in and called Zimon at about three in the morning. Curse his irritatingly attractive “I’m far away and blond and you know my fluttering brown eyes were dozing in that delicious way that makes you want to explore every inch of my tanned Californian surfer skin even though you can’t do anything about it.”
Also, curse his bastard attitude in insisting remaining friends. Don’t want to be friends. Would much rather be living in steady relationship bliss with his expert neuro-surgeon hands doing what they do best in the UK, rather than in smelly USA.
415am.
Fall had a nightmare so crawled into my bed, thus squashing my plans of calling Ash and making suggestive comments down the phone and using his amused giggles and no doubt equally suggestive comments to work self into a wankathon that would leave me thoroughly exhausted and asleep. Took half sleeping pill instead. Hopefully Z’s will kick in shortly.
9am.
Why didn’t I take the sleeping pill at 1130? Groggy and still slightly drowsy from self medication, but enjoying a breakfast of bran flakes and Nicki’s exposed stomach across the table from me. He has a coffee and an archaeology journal and an open shirt. Being woken by Fall’s frantic need for pancakes at 8am was well worth it.
7pm.
Hectic day. Anton’s physiotherapy is not progressing well because he refuses to let Daniel touch him to measure up a better prosthetic limb. Had to growl at him into submission with threats of fetching Dr. Octavius and a rectal examination. That woman is fixated with bums. More so than yours truly.
Fall had a brief, sociopathic fit when he couldn’t find his black and white jumper. He had to wear it, absolutely. It was one of his funny turns but was easily resolved when I pulled it out the dryer all warm and snugly. He was suitably placated for the day which left me free to pursue other methods of entertainment - mainly a red hair archaeologist who was covered in mud.
He’s decided to start landscaping the garden. I have no issues with this, although I think the management may protest when his landscaping ends up with just a great big hole in the garden. Bless him, his eyes all lit up when he dug up a bone next doors dog had buried. He washed it in the sink and everything. Somehow get the impression he misses field work. Had an odd moment when he didn’t realise he had mud on his face and instead of wiping it off himself he asked me to do. Curse him.
9pm.
Must stop obsessively writing in diary, only had the bloody thing a day and keep trying to think of witty comments to throw in. Who the hell is going to be reading this anyway?