i still love you...
i still haven't been able to forgive myself for anything that i did and i dont know if i will. i was so stupid. i'm trying so hard to be happy but it's so hard to be happy when everything inside of me hurts so much. i try to not think about anything, anything at all and yet thinking about everything is all i can do. why didn't i do this or that, what do i do now, or what do i do if you end up with someone else because you are all i want? how can i really be happy when i messed up my chance with the only girl who can truly make me happy and now the future with us is in jeopardy because of me? i don't want anyone else, i know that for sure. i know i messed up so much and that if i had everything to do all over again, i could make you the happiest person in the world because of everything i have learned. i just want to happy again...