jacksmom53
in
gsa_lj
My child is trans, help!
I apologize for this post if any find it offensive or ignorant. I was referred here by my sister, who told me that livejournal had many good communities for this kinds of issues
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This is "Free To Be You and Me".
I live in a town very close to a military base, so we are nearly overpopulated with people of all different natures, and yet we have virtually no support groups, except for military families, and that's just on post.
Ah, part of your good fortune may be precisely because you were "very close to a military base". There have been a lot of studies that point out that "Army Brats" as well as kids from all sorts of families that traveled a lot, including those hose parent's were in the diplomatic corps, multinational corporations, especially if it included stints overseas, are some of THE most open minded people in the world. This would be because after you have been bounced thru multiple places and cultures unless you are as dumb as a rock you can't help but realize that people are people and local bigotry and prejudices being to look silly. Especially when every time you are moved you find a brand new set of cultural "norms".
it's up to their friends to help them through things
Many of my daughter's school friends from that Jr-High and HS time are still her friends now. Of course now THEY are the "grown-ups" and the "parents", a concept I still have trouble with since to me they are all perennially the gaggle of kids who were over at my home after school dancing to MTV, doing the school Literary Magazine on my Computer and eating everything in the house like a horde of hungry locusts.
Hmmm . . . saying this makes me think that may be another "good thing". Our house was one of the hang-outs, so a strong social bond was created that could withstand the school bullies. Also being in various "Activities", like the Literary Magazine and other after-school and summer-school "Club" activities builds social cohesion and again deters bullies both among a child's peer group and dim-witted bureaucrats.
Look at what recently happened when the school officials themselves tried to pick on a MtF girl, her friends and acquaintances ALL took up the fight on her behalf and the school and Board of Ed had to back down.
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I suppose that makes sense. We don't actually have many military kids at our school, though. Not any that have moved around a lot, anyway. Most of our school, and town, really, is made up of people who have lived in this town for their entire lives and they don't know anything outside of it. That might also be a factor; if you've known someone since preschool, you're probably going to accept them as them, because it won't be a big shock when they come out as whatever they are. I mean, really, it's just at school where you see such acceptance. The adults here are pretty cruel and very religious, unless they're soldiers. Soldiers are actually really open minded. So many of my dad's teammates (past and present) have been gay, it just doesn't phase anyone anymore. Most are out, too, and their commanders don't give a crap. As long as they don't do anything to showcase that to the higher-ups (you know, Don't Ask Don't Tell BS), no one cares.
Yeah, a good group of friends can protect anyone from just about anything in society, especially in schools. There was a kid in my gym class last year who was just awkward (I really think he has some sort of mental illness, something minor but still enough to affect his life, you know?), and so many kids picked on him last year. A group of us tried to always be nice to him, and this year he has a close group of friends who take care of him. No one has said anything about him all year. It's bizarre, almost.
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My wise friend Tamara posted this to her facebook page: What Are Friends For? A Longer Life
Soldiers are actually really open minded. So many of my dad's teammates (past and present) have been gay, it just doesn't phase anyone anymore. Most are out, too, and their commanders don't give a crap. As long as they don't do anything to showcase that to the higher-ups (you know, Don't Ask Don't Tell BS), no one cares.
Because of something that happened in an interview a while before he ever declared for President I have always thought that Senator John McCain was one of servicemen who had out gay friends that he protected. Someone nitwit (probably "Faux News") interviewer was pushing and pushing at him to say how disgusting gay people were and how upset he would have been in HE had to have one of "them" in his barracks. Instead Senator McCain started turning red and his fabled temper started to flair up. He barked some things at the unfortunate journalist that made it CLEAR that HE thought No Such Thing and found the entire line of questioning repulsive.
I don't remember his exact words but they reminded me of exactly what I had heard from others of his age who had spent a lifetime standing up for THEIR LGBT friends at a time when it was hardly understood, still classified as a mental disorder in some places and a very difficult and courageous thing to do.
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Anyway, one thing I did have a problem with in McCain was that even though he may have had those personal feelings about gay people, he wouldn't have implemented them into his presidency. He wouldn't have allowed gay marriage or gays to be open in the military. (and did you mean "Faux News" as in Fox News [hate them, Jesus Christ.] or Fake News [as in The Daily Show]? I'm assuming Fox News, right?)
That's because of the bond that is built while overseas, fighting. You may not accept a person's lifestyle at first, but once you're over there fighting for the same cause, listening to bombs and guns go off all around you, you will protect them. The bond between soldiers is incredible. My dad hates half of his team on a personal level right now, but he'd take a bullet for any of them at a moment's notice.
Unless you meant just people in general in that time standing up for their LGBT friends. In that case, I really have no explanation. xD
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