Terrortours: "Action holidays for the wizard family with a sense of adventure!"
So there I was.
In Transylvania with my Terrortours group and surrounded by a herd of Flesh Eating Zombies. My floo buddy and I got lost. At the moment, Gary Stu was lying on the floor incapacitated. He had the original ability to regenerate his limbs, and excrete butterflies from his bowels-- but it would take a while before he woke up, and save us with his Bowels of Love.
I went up to the Zombies and said, "Hullo, Heathens. My name is Gregory Goyle. Don't worry, I can help you. For I am a Junior Death Eater! Do you, by any chance, like pamphlets?"
An hour later, with the pamphlets torn to shreds on the floor, the Zombie gnawing on my head, and me insisting, "Zombies can be helpful to the Death Eater cause too! If only as dispensable pawns of the Dark Lord!"-- a stone tablet the the size of hippogriff, fell in front of us.
The gnawing Zombie peeked at the tablet and moved his lips as if silently reading it. Then he looked at me with a sympathetic smile and pointed out, "It's for you, Goyle. It says that your test scores were disqualified due to an excessive use of the letter 'E'. You have to return for summer school."
Then the Zombies dragged me away to the nearest floo network as I screamed, "No! For the love of Voldemort, just eat me already! I don't want to go back to school!" However, they threw me into the chimney and insisted that they were doing this for my own good.
"Did you know, Goyle," a rotting Zombie named Igor asked, "That even a degree the Dark Arts is now a prerequisite for becoming a Death Eater? These days you need an education for everything!" Bradley, the Zombie what had previously gnawed on my head told me that it was because he didn't get a proper education that he was now wandering around the Zombie Trial scavenging for human flesh. "I could have been a doctor!" he swore.
In Transylvania with my Terrortours group and surrounded by a herd of Flesh Eating Zombies. My floo buddy and I got lost. At the moment, Gary Stu was lying on the floor incapacitated. He had the original ability to regenerate his limbs, and excrete butterflies from his bowels-- but it would take a while before he woke up, and save us with his Bowels of Love.
I went up to the Zombies and said, "Hullo, Heathens. My name is Gregory Goyle. Don't worry, I can help you. For I am a Junior Death Eater! Do you, by any chance, like pamphlets?"
An hour later, with the pamphlets torn to shreds on the floor, the Zombie gnawing on my head, and me insisting, "Zombies can be helpful to the Death Eater cause too! If only as dispensable pawns of the Dark Lord!"-- a stone tablet the the size of hippogriff, fell in front of us.
The gnawing Zombie peeked at the tablet and moved his lips as if silently reading it. Then he looked at me with a sympathetic smile and pointed out, "It's for you, Goyle. It says that your test scores were disqualified due to an excessive use of the letter 'E'. You have to return for summer school."
Then the Zombies dragged me away to the nearest floo network as I screamed, "No! For the love of Voldemort, just eat me already! I don't want to go back to school!" However, they threw me into the chimney and insisted that they were doing this for my own good.
"Did you know, Goyle," a rotting Zombie named Igor asked, "That even a degree the Dark Arts is now a prerequisite for becoming a Death Eater? These days you need an education for everything!" Bradley, the Zombie what had previously gnawed on my head told me that it was because he didn't get a proper education that he was now wandering around the Zombie Trial scavenging for human flesh. "I could have been a doctor!" he swore.