i think this is my longest poem

[groupie_chick]

i cant stand this pain inside
its like i cant hide
the sadness
that guilt of not being there
when i needed me the most
and now its like im fighting my own ghost
my past
its like all the things that i have done hit me harder evey time
i cant sleep
what can i do
i keep on asking "who?"
who can help?
who can heal this pain?
i try to fix it myself
but over and over again
i fail
the white powder,.
the dark drink.
yeah it helps for a bit
i try everything that everyone says
but the pain comes back and its like i cant quit
useing those false things that everyone trys
but the stuff i use makes me feel like a loser
and i find the bruses and the
scares from the battle wounds
but then i soon found out that all those things are lies.
every scare and cut is from a lie from a
pit in Hell.
But that thing that i found was like a band aid
that heals what i feel
Christ.
he is real
he helped me and is helping me still
now im a solider for his army
standing strong
not still
now that my Lord has my back
and what is great is he is demanding
more soles for his army
and i am Still Standing.