(no subject)
I have mostly managed to move on with my life without Melanie; in a way, she doesn't control me anymore as if she were my goddess. However, I still have feelings for her. I see photos of her with her new boyfriend, and I become sad. I compare my life to hers at the moment, and I can't help but feel blessed that I'm in a better place than I was back two years ago. However, the same can't be said about her; it's been dismal to say the least. We both live in two worlds. She says that she's getting her life back on track, but she's said something similar before...only to fall back into the abyss. The only comfort that I have is that the relationship won't last. Of course, I don't want the guy to die. Mela, I realize that the things that I said about Chris were mean. I understand that you loved him and he made you happy and that you will always love him, and I apologize for all the crap that I said about him. However, I hope that you understand that I will always love you, no matter the distance between us. I love all of the friends that I have and all of the female friends that I have met during my time at FIU. This, along with Christ most importantly, has given me a new outlook on life. I feel that I can go on with my life in true happiness, though Mela still has a place in my heart, and will always. Love you Mela. No matter what, you'll always be the love of my life, though you might not fully understand and comprehend it.