(no subject)
From Jean Grey's journal...
It's been one of those days. Where everyone is doing something else. Where you hardly ever see another human being. When the loneliness gets so strong, you feel like you're suffocating. Like there's no air left to breathe. And the silence is so powerful that it hurts your ears. And no matter what else you do, no matter how loud you play your music, or how high you turn up the television, you can still hear it. Like a ringing in your ears, that just won't go away. But you have no way of knowing if everyone else feels it too, or if it's just you. One of those days where maybe it would have been easier if you'd just stayed dead, because then you wouldn't have to feel. The crushing loneliness. The abandonment. The pain. And maybe it's feeling that, that makes us human. But it still hurts.
She closed her journal, stood up from the desk, and listened. There was nothing. Not the sounds of children playing, or people talking. Nothing that could make her shake the uneasiness clouding her. She picked up her pack of cigarettes and just looked at it for a moment.
Walking out of her room, she drifted down the hallway like a specter. Not a soul in sight. No one. Leaving her feeling more alone then before. It wasn't a dream. There had to be people here somewhere, but she didn't have the energy to go searching. Usually the academy was like a hive, constantly bustling with activity. But now it felt more like a ghost town.
Jean walked out the glass doors in the study, with no particular destination in mind. She headed towards the trees. The cool air and the strong evergreen scent usually made her feel better. But not today. Not tonight.
She sat down on a fallen tree trunk, hidden in the shadows at the edge of a clearing and lit a cigarette after realizing that the pack was still in her hand. It was as good of a way to spend time as any.
It's been one of those days. Where everyone is doing something else. Where you hardly ever see another human being. When the loneliness gets so strong, you feel like you're suffocating. Like there's no air left to breathe. And the silence is so powerful that it hurts your ears. And no matter what else you do, no matter how loud you play your music, or how high you turn up the television, you can still hear it. Like a ringing in your ears, that just won't go away. But you have no way of knowing if everyone else feels it too, or if it's just you. One of those days where maybe it would have been easier if you'd just stayed dead, because then you wouldn't have to feel. The crushing loneliness. The abandonment. The pain. And maybe it's feeling that, that makes us human. But it still hurts.
She closed her journal, stood up from the desk, and listened. There was nothing. Not the sounds of children playing, or people talking. Nothing that could make her shake the uneasiness clouding her. She picked up her pack of cigarettes and just looked at it for a moment.
Walking out of her room, she drifted down the hallway like a specter. Not a soul in sight. No one. Leaving her feeling more alone then before. It wasn't a dream. There had to be people here somewhere, but she didn't have the energy to go searching. Usually the academy was like a hive, constantly bustling with activity. But now it felt more like a ghost town.
Jean walked out the glass doors in the study, with no particular destination in mind. She headed towards the trees. The cool air and the strong evergreen scent usually made her feel better. But not today. Not tonight.
She sat down on a fallen tree trunk, hidden in the shadows at the edge of a clearing and lit a cigarette after realizing that the pack was still in her hand. It was as good of a way to spend time as any.