What would you wish for?
I 'unno. I wanna blame the rain, but I've been really weird today. Woke up past 2p and was still possessed by the idea that I wanted to continue sleeping... normally I can't sleep a wink past 2p... and 's not like I stayed up super late last night, 3a-ish. But all day today, I felt like I was missing something.
Chattered with Kyle a bit... still felt like I was missing something, didn' even really bother talking to Josh much... didn't feel any change there... I really feel lost. Wonder if Ethan can remedy it?
I really don't know. Have I mentioned just how lost and confused I am right now? *sighs* on a totally, hopefully, unrelated note, Ryan and I's anniversary is coming up... but then again, so is orientation / registration, Red Mug anniversary, Sunset anniversary, and well... I knew a few other's but right now it feels so pointless. I think I should go to bed early tonight... doubt that will work. Kinda re thinking that idea.
I think I might lay the blame on this new show. I keep connecting Gorgeous to it and I really really really need to stop doing that. My thoughts are sent spinning into oblivion 'specially since the show went further than we have at just ep 4. This show is really different though. All the other ones, the guys that the girls are crazy for are totally dead and fairly lifeless, as if they're just extras standing in the background. Even on Tokyo Mew Mew... the guy became a main character, and he was so flat. But in this show [very girly and comedic romancish], the guy has just as many problems as the girl and he's pretty damn real.
I have to wonder if deep down inside, I'm missing Ryan Besing. = ( I do miss him every now and then.. but right now, it feels so stupid that I'm not talking to him. I can barely remember what was wrong with him... I wish Ethan was around more, to keep telling me all the horrible things he did and made me feel.. this damn memory refuses to remember them.
I suppose I simply wish he hated me as much as I know I should him.
Chattered with Kyle a bit... still felt like I was missing something, didn' even really bother talking to Josh much... didn't feel any change there... I really feel lost. Wonder if Ethan can remedy it?
I really don't know. Have I mentioned just how lost and confused I am right now? *sighs* on a totally, hopefully, unrelated note, Ryan and I's anniversary is coming up... but then again, so is orientation / registration, Red Mug anniversary, Sunset anniversary, and well... I knew a few other's but right now it feels so pointless. I think I should go to bed early tonight... doubt that will work. Kinda re thinking that idea.
I think I might lay the blame on this new show. I keep connecting Gorgeous to it and I really really really need to stop doing that. My thoughts are sent spinning into oblivion 'specially since the show went further than we have at just ep 4. This show is really different though. All the other ones, the guys that the girls are crazy for are totally dead and fairly lifeless, as if they're just extras standing in the background. Even on Tokyo Mew Mew... the guy became a main character, and he was so flat. But in this show [very girly and comedic romancish], the guy has just as many problems as the girl and he's pretty damn real.
I have to wonder if deep down inside, I'm missing Ryan Besing. = ( I do miss him every now and then.. but right now, it feels so stupid that I'm not talking to him. I can barely remember what was wrong with him... I wish Ethan was around more, to keep telling me all the horrible things he did and made me feel.. this damn memory refuses to remember them.
I suppose I simply wish he hated me as much as I know I should him.