Lost Fic for Five Acts started by toestastegood
Title: ouroborus or the snake that devours its own tail
Character(s)/Pairing(s): sorta Jacob/Richard/Esau triangle
Summary: AU. Jacob and Esau fight over Richard in any time period.
Notes: Originally for aurilly. Some grammar and logic edits.
Richard choked, spat out water, heaved himself out from the sand; he had heard voices.
As he readjusted his eyes to the two young boys (one blonde, the other dark haired) excitedly babbling over him and arguing about telling their mother, Richard forced his fuzzy mind to refocus on what just happened.
Two years after Jacob and Esau's latest pawns had died and he remained unaged, strangers had come--two women and five men. All wearing unfamiliar clothes, and who seemed to already know his name somehow. Then one of them, a particularly twitchy fellow (Daniel, he introduced himself as Daniel), had begun babbling about time travel and started to completely lose Richard. He took them to Jacob, wondering if they were acquaintances of his (they seemed just as odd and privy to conspiracy); they had argued with him in his lighthouse. And when Esau joined the disagreement...well, things escalated. It somehow ended up with the Monster slamming him into the lighthouse's mirror, it cracking beneath him; he saw a flash of light, felt himself spin and fall--and that was the last thing Richard remembered.
The dark eyed man abruptly returned to the present when he heard the boy shout something at the other.
"What did you call him?" Richard snapped, and he felt too on edge to even feel guilty as the two children flinched at the harshness in his tone.
The blonde muttered, "Esau--that's my brother's name."
Suddenly feeling very light-headed, Richard asked, "And yours?"
"Jacob."
Richard dearly wished he could lie down.
He settled for letting his head fall into his weary hands.
"Sir...sir, where did you come from?" Oh god, that was Esau--Richard wrenched his face from his trembling arms, staring at the dark-haired boy, brimming with excitement and curiosity. His brother--who knew Jacob could've ever been so young--looked on protectively, trying to hide his own deep interest, but unsuccessfully.
"Tenerife, Canary Islands," Richard whispered in a hoarse voice, on automatic.
The child Jacob blinked at him. "You came from another island?"
The young Monster--no, he wasn't a monster yet, just Esau, only Esau--said in a pondering voice, "I suppose if the sea's so large, everyone lives on islands...."
"When they're particularly big, they're called something else--continents," muttered Richard blankly, instinctively informative.
That only made the child Esau more eager. "How did you get here?"
"What's your name?"
"Are there others?"
The boys continued to bombard him with questions, and the bile was finally starting to rise in Richard's throat--but he paused and stiffened when he heard an all too familiar clicking noise, no matter how low and subtle they were. His hand immediately reached for his knife, no matter how useless.
His dark eyes fell to Esau, but the boy had turned his head toward the woods too, along with Jacob--but there was something...off. They looked only concerned, not fighting back terror at the metallic clicks, perhaps they had never seen--Richard's mind fired up with the possibilities: had the Monster predated Esau and Jacob, was it something outside of Esau that later possessed him, what--
Richard abruptly stood up, knife clutched in his hand, as a well-worn woman with sea shells in her dark hair stepped out from the trees (the clicks had stopped seconds before her appearance).
Maybe it was his imagination spurred on by the Monster's trademark howls and his own mad theorizing and everything else, but Richard thought that by just having the woman regard him coldly and calculatingly was enough evidence that she was that creature in this time; there was something about those eyes that reminded him of the Esau he knew, and even Jacob.
"What are you two doing?" The suspected monster said, her eyes never leaving Richard.
Esau stepped forward, begining, "He washed ashore--"
"We helped him out--" Jacob continued (and Richard adjusted the grip on his knife, warily eyed the woman's dark shadow in the sand).
"He's from another island, Mother--" Esau said, his eyes alight with triumph and excitement.
"From another island, you say?" She replied, favoring him with a humorless smile that Richard didn't return. "And what's your name, stranger?"
Though he had been going by 'Richard' more these days, the man answered, "Ricardus." And again, he wondered--had Jacob and Esau always known? They persistently called him 'Ricardus....' What had that time travelling Daniel muttered? "Whatever happened, happened?" If he had met Jacob and Esau before, did they remember him...had Richard somehow doomed himself?...god, what was going on?
The boys' mother invited him to their shelter in a manner that distinctly made Richard feel like he was walking into a trap--still, he went. Where else could he possibly go? (It all led back to the Island, all of it.)
As they traveled through the woods, the children kept close to him, Jacob and Esau on either side of him. The two kept asking him questions and watching him with awe--but soon they began arguing over his attention, and had even started tugging him in their direction at some points, shooting the other brother a glare. Richard had just felt dazed by an insane, twisted deja vu.
Why was it him? Why was it always him these two so intensely fought over? It had gotten to a point where Richard felt distinctly higher than a pawn in Jacob and Esau's eyes--and it wasn't a very pleasant feeling. More like having two wolves fighting over the same bone.
Even as children, they treated him as a plaything to rage and snipe over....
Perhaps this was why they fixated on him? Had it all started as just a chilhood game that had turned wildly perverted in the future?...
Later, Richard couldn't sleep in the caves. Too much had happened, not to mention he really didn't care to close his eyes a moment with that woman around, monster or not.
He watched the boys sleep peacefully together, dreamily shuffling around. He remembered with a pang how he and Isabella never had children of their own, never even took one in. He remembered the children on the Island he had started to care for, and were now grown, and still growing, while he stayed the same and tried to not think of the inevitable.
Richard wondered if maybe Daniel was wrong? This boy, Esau, surely didn't have to be a Monster...he looked so innocent now....
(Somewhere in the fuzzy before, Ricardo sleeps in the wreck of the statue, exhausted, while a grown Jacob and Esau wonder why the stranger that washed up ashore in their childhood doesn't seem to remember them at all. Later, they have their answer.)
Title: the cuckoo bird
Character(s)/Pairing(s): Juliet/Sawyer, Juliet/Richard
Summary: S5 AU. Time travelling is no place to raise a baby, or become a surrogate father.
Notes: Originally for ozmissage. Sorta spin-off from WIP series "Just My Luck"--it's a little different from what's written already, and with some details that've been rough draft for a while. And thanks to thorongirl, I have a link to a RL story about Nestor Carbonell constantly being thought of as an eyeliner-user that inspired part of this fic.
Sawyer gaped when Juliet and Daniel returned on the sub--though mostly his eyes were on the woman's growing stomach. (The only answer she'd ever given him on who the father was just her eliminating Jack as the prime suspect.)
"Thought you left?" He asked her, dazed, once they're in private. A little more forcefully, he said, "What about the Island being leth--"
"I got sick," she cut him off, and damn if she didn't actually look pale.
Sawyer shot Daniel an alarmed look. The scientist nodded, looking even more ill, "I wondered if time travel still had some effect--she had some symptoms…similar, to Charlotte's…" Dan shook his head, continuing quietly, "But Juliet thinks it's a reverse of the problem she dealt with before--er, later--that is--"
"I don't think I can safely deliver the baby off the Island," Juliet cut in smoothly, staring Sawyer in the eye.
"Why the hell would that happen?" He snarled lowly, with the full expectation that she would dryly snap back something like 'how the hell should I know? I've never even figured out the first pregnancy problem--'
"I think it has something to do with the father," she said instead.
Sawyer stared at her; glanced at Daniel, who nervously looked away, and damn it, Twitchy knew before him....
"How the hell could daddy dearest have anything to do with you and the kid dying if you're not back here on Craphole Island--?"
"Because Richard's the father."
And Sawyer couldn't even summon up a "sonofabitch" to his lips, he was too damn surprised. Not about her and Guyliner being involved--they were all on Team Other for a while back there, comrades and crap like that, and she had asked for him, so certain he'd be there in the 50s, and he was…and still here, same as ever, in the 70s. An unreal ageless freak, only on Craphole Island would you find something as insane as that--and what was surprising how it seemed to fit whatever weird shit was going on with Juliet's pregnancy with him being the father and all.
"Dan?"
"Juliet?"
The three turned to find Jin and Miles catching up to the rest of their fellow time travelers in Sawyer's living room.
"What are you--Jim, what's--"
Miles turned to Sawyer, but he just shook his head, growling, "I'm getting a drink," leaving it up to Blondie and Twitchy to explain the whole damn thing again.
###
Sawyer begins to think of Juliet's kid as a ticking time bomb of guilt.
He felt it whenever he saw how kind Jin was around her, but pained at the same time--no doubt thinking about Jin probably as far along in her pregnancy.
Felt it whenever another search was run, and still no sign of Claire, or even Rose and Bernard--hell, they couldn't even find Vincent. (Could dogs shift through time?)
Felt it when he was reminded of Clementine, who he'd probably never see at this rate. He wondered if Cass ever had this much company during her pregnancy--with him, Miles, Jin, and Daniel, they all pretty much fluttered around Juliet anxiously and trying to do every little thing for her (that she allowed, anyway, her and her stupid pride). He felt weirdly bad for Guyliner even--at this rate, he'd probably never know he even had a kid. Juliet showed no intention of returning to Others in this time period---which hadn't be an unlikely possibility to Sawyer. In his mind, if any of them could convince those guys to take them on, she could (given she was one of them before--in the future--fuck time travel).
So she stayed in Dharmaville, apparently without any interest in being with daddy dearest.
Once, James actually asked her point blank about that.
"The smoke monster's sentient. It can change into people." And since this was Juliet and him asking her about Richard and her kid, James had no doubt she was being dead serious. "And it doesn't like Richard."
Who doesn't have the benefit of a sonar fence.
Well, whatever--it wasn't his kid. Juliet had to do what she thought best.
James sensed one final stab of guilt from the woman herself though.
Once, with a baby name book opened up on her stomach, and him trying to make muffins for her in the kitchen, Juliet had told him about her own nephew, Julian, who she's never even met yet.
"He's gonna have a baby cousin," she murmured dreamily. "Rachel would've had some good ideas for names," she said softly, tracing an edge of a page.
James quietly asked what name she was thinking of.
Juliet had just shrugged at him, slightly smirking.
To make matters worse, he'd burned the damn muffins.
But Juliet had just laughed it off, and somehow everything felt better.
###
Another time, Juliet let James and the others feel her stomach kick.
For a full five minutes, it kicked. It hadn't stopped when their hands left her belly.
"Jesus, it's gonna be a handful, isn't it?"
"Babies tend to be," said Juliet sagely.
###
Somehow the sonar fence had malfunctioned one night, the smoke monster invaded, bunch of their people fleeing into the forest--Sawyer stuck to Juliet's side, going as slow as her waddling, she was so big now, too far along--
"My water broke."
"Sonofabitch."
Mini Ben had run into them, and immediately Juliet had given orders to the boy, even as she slumped against the tree and Sawyer quickly lowered her down.
"Ben, I need you to find--to find the Hostiles--" James knew she'd almost said 'Richard,' and decided at the last minute that may've risked their cover too much "-- please, ask them for help--surely they know how to avoid the monster, they've been here longer--"
And the boy was off, and Sawyer just had his hand held by Juliet's so tight, it felt it was gonna break in her grasp.
"So…déjà vu for you, James?"
Christ, how can he be breathing more harshly than her? "With our fuckin' luck, future me's in the trees watching this all play out."
Juliet actually laughed.
At a sudden noise, Sawyer raised his gun, drawing closer to Juliet--of course, it was Richard, bag slung over his shoulder.
The ageless other quickly removed supplies from his pack, began making a fire and heating water with Sawyer's help.
The rest was a blur. Richard would say something soothing to Juliet, who tried really hard not to scream and managed to stay silent; and James would try his damnedest not to vomit, worried any moment they'd hear a warning click and then they'd all be screwed.
Once, Juliet asked, "Where's Ben?"
"I made him stay with my people for now."
It was then Juliet at least started to whimper. And then for James it was either bend over and throw up in the bush or press a wet, determined kiss on her sweaty forehead--kiss it was.
And finally, finally a really fuckin' high-pitched scream rent the air, apart from the scream the new mother had finally screeched out, and Richard pulled something small and wriggly and slimy and red out and--and sonofabitch, it had to be the lighting from the fire illuminating the dark, but the baby was suddenly the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen in his whole worthless life.
"W--what is it?"
It took a while for James to work his mouth around the hoarse words, "It's a boy."
"It is?" Juliet's voice was exhausted, but he could still hear the relieved, giddy smile in it.
Richard was smiling too, and damn if he didn't suddenly look a whole lot younger then--maybe even his own age. But James wondered if the guy would've looked even more ecstatic if he realized he was holding his own son (and it was then he wondered if Richard ever had kids before--he was certainly impossibly old enough for that). James helped him clean the boy and cut the umbilical cord and swaddle him in a blanket Richard had packed, the whole nine yards. When Richard gently passed the screaming baby to Juliet's arms, Sawyer watched them, and felt something tight and hot in his chest--some kinda pride, some kinda jealousy, some kinda regret and pity for the father and son that had no clue what was going on, for the momma that had to carry it all.
Then all hell broke loose.
There were clicks--but the clicks of guns, not a monster, and coming from both sides.
Immediately Juliet tried to slide back with the wailing kid in her arms, and James just went to her, hauling her up and away. Both watched as Richard immediately stood up, his hands raised, his eyes narrowed. Juliet glanced, found Horace and Phil and Amy and other Dharma folk (but no Dan or Jin or Miles, damn it) with their weapons aimed at Richard--who glanced pointedly at his own back-up, Eloise and Charles and--
"Ben--"
"Horace, retreat and we'll let the boy go," ordered Eloise firmly, Charles at her side with a young Ben held at gunpoint.
With his arms still around Juliet, James snapped, trying to make his voice a helluva lot louder than the kid's, "Richard here just helped save Juliet and her kid--so everyone needs to calm down, and back off."
Another tense few seconds passed, in which the newborn infant's voice only grew louder and louder, and Amy was the first to lower her weapon, along with the rest. A second later, Eloise nodded, and Charles shoved Ben to them, Sawyer grabbing the kid by the shoulder.
And with that, they went their separate ways, Richard and his people back to their camp, Juliet and her son and Sawyer back to what was left of Dharmaville.
"So, what's the squirt's name?"
Juliet slowly rested her head on James' shoulder; his arm hadn't left her side since they started the long march home.
With her son shuffling around in her arms and still crying, but softly now, Juliet murmured, "Isaac."
###
3 years later
Lara Chang was very patient with Isaac after he pointed a small finger at her growing stomach and demanded an explanation.
"I'm just having a baby." When Isaac crinkled his small nose, she added, "It might be a little boy or a girl for you to play with."
Later, the three-year-old interrupted his mother's poker game with Miles and Jamie.
"Where did Mrs. Chang get her baby?"
Isaac's dark eyes stared at Miles when his head immediately sank into the table. The child heard him groan, and Jamie laughed, patting the other man's head good-naturedly.
His mother just smiled that crooked smile of hers, and promised to tell him when he was older.
1 year later
Juliet was at the motor pool and James had a break in his shift--so it was him that got to pick up Isaac from the principal's office.
James' worries only increase when he found the dark haired, dark eyed kindergartener beat up, with a black eye, some bruises and cuts, his clothes torn and dirty. But the older boys next to him actually don't look much better off.
The principal just told him the obvious: Isaac and these first graders had gotten into a fight, and neither would say what it was about. Of course, they would all be sent home for the day.
Maybe against his better judgment, Sawyer tried to carry the kid home, once they were out of sight of Dharma's schoolhouse. Shit, the boy was only 4 and his legs were banged up too.
But Isaac had stubbornly and angrily refused his help, growling he was a big boy now. Sawyer was distinctly reminded of Juliet.
And so they both walked home, albeit slowly.
Still, James made him sit on the porch when he fixed him up with some first aid, ignoring the way the kid fidgeted, Isaac really just couldn't keep still for one damn minute.
"Gonna tell me what happened?"
Isaac nervously chewed his lip, but stayed silent.
"If you don't tell me, who's gonna get your mom to calm down?" At times, there wasn't much to pressing a kid's buttons the right way.
Grumbling something incomprehensible, Isaac finally started, "They were making fun of me."
"Go on."
"The same stupid name over and over again--"
"Don't sound very creative."
"It's because of my stupid eyes--"
James froze for a split second. Then hoping Isaac didn't notice, asked, "What do they call you?"
"'Guyliner,'" Isaac grumbled, and damned, if that didn't make Sawyer feel like a complete ass. Of course, he'd never even thought that about Isaac, but he'd thought and said it plenty of times about his old man (of course, anything said was always out of the boy's earshot). But still, it seemed an offense to the kid too, 'cause there was no denying Isaac had inherited his daddy's eyes--and his hair, and just, just everything, Isaac looked like he'd grow into the spitting image of Richard when he was older.
"And 'Eyeliner Boy' and they say even Mom's eyes aren't as girly like mine, and Tim sometimes calls me 'Faggot'--"
James briefly saw red--but then he just told Isaac there was nothin' wrong with his eyes, and that kids can be just stupid and cruel.
But Isaac still growled, now with a sniffle, "I hate my eyes."
###
"Isaac."
The boy froze from his place on a stool at the bathroom sink, turning to his mother framed in the door.
"What are you doing?"
"I--" and he instinctively lowered the scissors from his eyes with Juliet still staring him down. "I was just gonna cut my lashes," he mumbled.
James had told her about this before, and it had calmed her ire.
Juliet just sighed, removed the scissors from his small hand, then carried him out of the bathroom, and sat him on the couch.
"Isaac, your eyes are handsome." The boy just snorted, but Juliet knew he was lucky she hadn't gone with her first distinctive description, 'beautiful.'
"They're your father's, you know."
Isaac knew mom rarely talked about him. The boy asked, "Where is he?"
Juliet told him he died in a shipwreck, and that was that; for now, the boy felt too guilty to ask for more detail.
Later when trying to avoid her own guilt, Juliet shared what happened with Isaac and the scissors that afternoon with the others at the poker table.
"God, he's gonna be a nightmare when he's a teen, isn't he?" James muttered even as Miles snickered, and even Jin and Daniel laughed, while Juliet just gave a tired smile.
###
1 year later
In the morning, Juliet pressed her nose into James' back, her arms tight around his waist; the man rustled in the covers, pleased. They were barely awake, which suit them just fine--it was a real nice, sleepy morning--
Something bounced excitedly in their bed, and James moaned into his pillow, while Juliet moaned into his back.
But they groggily got up, and James even managed a smirk at Isaac's beaming face.
"What's up, Hotshot?"
"Must be the science fair, Ms. Distine was letting your class watch it today, wasn't she?" Juliet asked, smirking as she leaned against James, her eyes going up and down, watching her son bounce.
Rolling his eyes, Isaac said, "It's my birthday!"
"Really? Plain forgot about that," said James in a chipper, teasing voice, and Isaac just rolled his eyes again. The boy then stuck himself right in between his mother and Jamie. "Can I get pancakes for breakfast?"
"Sure," Juliet said, ruffling his dark hair.
"With ice cream?"
"No, that'll be later."
The phone rang, and Sawyer reached over, grabbing it.
"Yeah?" Minutes later, Sawyer shot Juliet a hard look, and she stiffened. Then her face grew impassive as James rushed out of bed and started dressing.
"What's wrong?" Isaac asked curiously, watching the man as Juliet began pulling him out of the bed.
"Just have these new recruits to meet, Hotshot. Last minute thing, you understand."
"Uh huh," Isaac said, though he really didn't. His mother took him to the kitchen, sitting him at the table. Isaac called out from there to the grown ups' bedroom, "Will Miles and Dan and Jin be with you when you get back?"
"Probably," James called back. When he rushed into the kitchen, he quickly hugged Isaac with one arm, told him happy birthday. Then Juliet gave him a hastily prepared breakfast for the road; she whispered, "did he say who--?" and James whispered back, "gonna find out now, Blondie;" and then they kissed, and James was out the door.
Character(s)/Pairing(s): sorta Jacob/Richard/Esau triangle
Summary: AU. Jacob and Esau fight over Richard in any time period.
Notes: Originally for aurilly. Some grammar and logic edits.
Richard choked, spat out water, heaved himself out from the sand; he had heard voices.
As he readjusted his eyes to the two young boys (one blonde, the other dark haired) excitedly babbling over him and arguing about telling their mother, Richard forced his fuzzy mind to refocus on what just happened.
Two years after Jacob and Esau's latest pawns had died and he remained unaged, strangers had come--two women and five men. All wearing unfamiliar clothes, and who seemed to already know his name somehow. Then one of them, a particularly twitchy fellow (Daniel, he introduced himself as Daniel), had begun babbling about time travel and started to completely lose Richard. He took them to Jacob, wondering if they were acquaintances of his (they seemed just as odd and privy to conspiracy); they had argued with him in his lighthouse. And when Esau joined the disagreement...well, things escalated. It somehow ended up with the Monster slamming him into the lighthouse's mirror, it cracking beneath him; he saw a flash of light, felt himself spin and fall--and that was the last thing Richard remembered.
The dark eyed man abruptly returned to the present when he heard the boy shout something at the other.
"What did you call him?" Richard snapped, and he felt too on edge to even feel guilty as the two children flinched at the harshness in his tone.
The blonde muttered, "Esau--that's my brother's name."
Suddenly feeling very light-headed, Richard asked, "And yours?"
"Jacob."
Richard dearly wished he could lie down.
He settled for letting his head fall into his weary hands.
"Sir...sir, where did you come from?" Oh god, that was Esau--Richard wrenched his face from his trembling arms, staring at the dark-haired boy, brimming with excitement and curiosity. His brother--who knew Jacob could've ever been so young--looked on protectively, trying to hide his own deep interest, but unsuccessfully.
"Tenerife, Canary Islands," Richard whispered in a hoarse voice, on automatic.
The child Jacob blinked at him. "You came from another island?"
The young Monster--no, he wasn't a monster yet, just Esau, only Esau--said in a pondering voice, "I suppose if the sea's so large, everyone lives on islands...."
"When they're particularly big, they're called something else--continents," muttered Richard blankly, instinctively informative.
That only made the child Esau more eager. "How did you get here?"
"What's your name?"
"Are there others?"
The boys continued to bombard him with questions, and the bile was finally starting to rise in Richard's throat--but he paused and stiffened when he heard an all too familiar clicking noise, no matter how low and subtle they were. His hand immediately reached for his knife, no matter how useless.
His dark eyes fell to Esau, but the boy had turned his head toward the woods too, along with Jacob--but there was something...off. They looked only concerned, not fighting back terror at the metallic clicks, perhaps they had never seen--Richard's mind fired up with the possibilities: had the Monster predated Esau and Jacob, was it something outside of Esau that later possessed him, what--
Richard abruptly stood up, knife clutched in his hand, as a well-worn woman with sea shells in her dark hair stepped out from the trees (the clicks had stopped seconds before her appearance).
Maybe it was his imagination spurred on by the Monster's trademark howls and his own mad theorizing and everything else, but Richard thought that by just having the woman regard him coldly and calculatingly was enough evidence that she was that creature in this time; there was something about those eyes that reminded him of the Esau he knew, and even Jacob.
"What are you two doing?" The suspected monster said, her eyes never leaving Richard.
Esau stepped forward, begining, "He washed ashore--"
"We helped him out--" Jacob continued (and Richard adjusted the grip on his knife, warily eyed the woman's dark shadow in the sand).
"He's from another island, Mother--" Esau said, his eyes alight with triumph and excitement.
"From another island, you say?" She replied, favoring him with a humorless smile that Richard didn't return. "And what's your name, stranger?"
Though he had been going by 'Richard' more these days, the man answered, "Ricardus." And again, he wondered--had Jacob and Esau always known? They persistently called him 'Ricardus....' What had that time travelling Daniel muttered? "Whatever happened, happened?" If he had met Jacob and Esau before, did they remember him...had Richard somehow doomed himself?...god, what was going on?
The boys' mother invited him to their shelter in a manner that distinctly made Richard feel like he was walking into a trap--still, he went. Where else could he possibly go? (It all led back to the Island, all of it.)
As they traveled through the woods, the children kept close to him, Jacob and Esau on either side of him. The two kept asking him questions and watching him with awe--but soon they began arguing over his attention, and had even started tugging him in their direction at some points, shooting the other brother a glare. Richard had just felt dazed by an insane, twisted deja vu.
Why was it him? Why was it always him these two so intensely fought over? It had gotten to a point where Richard felt distinctly higher than a pawn in Jacob and Esau's eyes--and it wasn't a very pleasant feeling. More like having two wolves fighting over the same bone.
Even as children, they treated him as a plaything to rage and snipe over....
Perhaps this was why they fixated on him? Had it all started as just a chilhood game that had turned wildly perverted in the future?...
Later, Richard couldn't sleep in the caves. Too much had happened, not to mention he really didn't care to close his eyes a moment with that woman around, monster or not.
He watched the boys sleep peacefully together, dreamily shuffling around. He remembered with a pang how he and Isabella never had children of their own, never even took one in. He remembered the children on the Island he had started to care for, and were now grown, and still growing, while he stayed the same and tried to not think of the inevitable.
Richard wondered if maybe Daniel was wrong? This boy, Esau, surely didn't have to be a Monster...he looked so innocent now....
(Somewhere in the fuzzy before, Ricardo sleeps in the wreck of the statue, exhausted, while a grown Jacob and Esau wonder why the stranger that washed up ashore in their childhood doesn't seem to remember them at all. Later, they have their answer.)
Title: the cuckoo bird
Character(s)/Pairing(s): Juliet/Sawyer, Juliet/Richard
Summary: S5 AU. Time travelling is no place to raise a baby, or become a surrogate father.
Notes: Originally for ozmissage. Sorta spin-off from WIP series "Just My Luck"--it's a little different from what's written already, and with some details that've been rough draft for a while. And thanks to thorongirl, I have a link to a RL story about Nestor Carbonell constantly being thought of as an eyeliner-user that inspired part of this fic.
Sawyer gaped when Juliet and Daniel returned on the sub--though mostly his eyes were on the woman's growing stomach. (The only answer she'd ever given him on who the father was just her eliminating Jack as the prime suspect.)
"Thought you left?" He asked her, dazed, once they're in private. A little more forcefully, he said, "What about the Island being leth--"
"I got sick," she cut him off, and damn if she didn't actually look pale.
Sawyer shot Daniel an alarmed look. The scientist nodded, looking even more ill, "I wondered if time travel still had some effect--she had some symptoms…similar, to Charlotte's…" Dan shook his head, continuing quietly, "But Juliet thinks it's a reverse of the problem she dealt with before--er, later--that is--"
"I don't think I can safely deliver the baby off the Island," Juliet cut in smoothly, staring Sawyer in the eye.
"Why the hell would that happen?" He snarled lowly, with the full expectation that she would dryly snap back something like 'how the hell should I know? I've never even figured out the first pregnancy problem--'
"I think it has something to do with the father," she said instead.
Sawyer stared at her; glanced at Daniel, who nervously looked away, and damn it, Twitchy knew before him....
"How the hell could daddy dearest have anything to do with you and the kid dying if you're not back here on Craphole Island--?"
"Because Richard's the father."
And Sawyer couldn't even summon up a "sonofabitch" to his lips, he was too damn surprised. Not about her and Guyliner being involved--they were all on Team Other for a while back there, comrades and crap like that, and she had asked for him, so certain he'd be there in the 50s, and he was…and still here, same as ever, in the 70s. An unreal ageless freak, only on Craphole Island would you find something as insane as that--and what was surprising how it seemed to fit whatever weird shit was going on with Juliet's pregnancy with him being the father and all.
"Dan?"
"Juliet?"
The three turned to find Jin and Miles catching up to the rest of their fellow time travelers in Sawyer's living room.
"What are you--Jim, what's--"
Miles turned to Sawyer, but he just shook his head, growling, "I'm getting a drink," leaving it up to Blondie and Twitchy to explain the whole damn thing again.
###
Sawyer begins to think of Juliet's kid as a ticking time bomb of guilt.
He felt it whenever he saw how kind Jin was around her, but pained at the same time--no doubt thinking about Jin probably as far along in her pregnancy.
Felt it whenever another search was run, and still no sign of Claire, or even Rose and Bernard--hell, they couldn't even find Vincent. (Could dogs shift through time?)
Felt it when he was reminded of Clementine, who he'd probably never see at this rate. He wondered if Cass ever had this much company during her pregnancy--with him, Miles, Jin, and Daniel, they all pretty much fluttered around Juliet anxiously and trying to do every little thing for her (that she allowed, anyway, her and her stupid pride). He felt weirdly bad for Guyliner even--at this rate, he'd probably never know he even had a kid. Juliet showed no intention of returning to Others in this time period---which hadn't be an unlikely possibility to Sawyer. In his mind, if any of them could convince those guys to take them on, she could (given she was one of them before--in the future--fuck time travel).
So she stayed in Dharmaville, apparently without any interest in being with daddy dearest.
Once, James actually asked her point blank about that.
"The smoke monster's sentient. It can change into people." And since this was Juliet and him asking her about Richard and her kid, James had no doubt she was being dead serious. "And it doesn't like Richard."
Who doesn't have the benefit of a sonar fence.
Well, whatever--it wasn't his kid. Juliet had to do what she thought best.
James sensed one final stab of guilt from the woman herself though.
Once, with a baby name book opened up on her stomach, and him trying to make muffins for her in the kitchen, Juliet had told him about her own nephew, Julian, who she's never even met yet.
"He's gonna have a baby cousin," she murmured dreamily. "Rachel would've had some good ideas for names," she said softly, tracing an edge of a page.
James quietly asked what name she was thinking of.
Juliet had just shrugged at him, slightly smirking.
To make matters worse, he'd burned the damn muffins.
But Juliet had just laughed it off, and somehow everything felt better.
###
Another time, Juliet let James and the others feel her stomach kick.
For a full five minutes, it kicked. It hadn't stopped when their hands left her belly.
"Jesus, it's gonna be a handful, isn't it?"
"Babies tend to be," said Juliet sagely.
###
Somehow the sonar fence had malfunctioned one night, the smoke monster invaded, bunch of their people fleeing into the forest--Sawyer stuck to Juliet's side, going as slow as her waddling, she was so big now, too far along--
"My water broke."
"Sonofabitch."
Mini Ben had run into them, and immediately Juliet had given orders to the boy, even as she slumped against the tree and Sawyer quickly lowered her down.
"Ben, I need you to find--to find the Hostiles--" James knew she'd almost said 'Richard,' and decided at the last minute that may've risked their cover too much "-- please, ask them for help--surely they know how to avoid the monster, they've been here longer--"
And the boy was off, and Sawyer just had his hand held by Juliet's so tight, it felt it was gonna break in her grasp.
"So…déjà vu for you, James?"
Christ, how can he be breathing more harshly than her? "With our fuckin' luck, future me's in the trees watching this all play out."
Juliet actually laughed.
At a sudden noise, Sawyer raised his gun, drawing closer to Juliet--of course, it was Richard, bag slung over his shoulder.
The ageless other quickly removed supplies from his pack, began making a fire and heating water with Sawyer's help.
The rest was a blur. Richard would say something soothing to Juliet, who tried really hard not to scream and managed to stay silent; and James would try his damnedest not to vomit, worried any moment they'd hear a warning click and then they'd all be screwed.
Once, Juliet asked, "Where's Ben?"
"I made him stay with my people for now."
It was then Juliet at least started to whimper. And then for James it was either bend over and throw up in the bush or press a wet, determined kiss on her sweaty forehead--kiss it was.
And finally, finally a really fuckin' high-pitched scream rent the air, apart from the scream the new mother had finally screeched out, and Richard pulled something small and wriggly and slimy and red out and--and sonofabitch, it had to be the lighting from the fire illuminating the dark, but the baby was suddenly the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen in his whole worthless life.
"W--what is it?"
It took a while for James to work his mouth around the hoarse words, "It's a boy."
"It is?" Juliet's voice was exhausted, but he could still hear the relieved, giddy smile in it.
Richard was smiling too, and damn if he didn't suddenly look a whole lot younger then--maybe even his own age. But James wondered if the guy would've looked even more ecstatic if he realized he was holding his own son (and it was then he wondered if Richard ever had kids before--he was certainly impossibly old enough for that). James helped him clean the boy and cut the umbilical cord and swaddle him in a blanket Richard had packed, the whole nine yards. When Richard gently passed the screaming baby to Juliet's arms, Sawyer watched them, and felt something tight and hot in his chest--some kinda pride, some kinda jealousy, some kinda regret and pity for the father and son that had no clue what was going on, for the momma that had to carry it all.
Then all hell broke loose.
There were clicks--but the clicks of guns, not a monster, and coming from both sides.
Immediately Juliet tried to slide back with the wailing kid in her arms, and James just went to her, hauling her up and away. Both watched as Richard immediately stood up, his hands raised, his eyes narrowed. Juliet glanced, found Horace and Phil and Amy and other Dharma folk (but no Dan or Jin or Miles, damn it) with their weapons aimed at Richard--who glanced pointedly at his own back-up, Eloise and Charles and--
"Ben--"
"Horace, retreat and we'll let the boy go," ordered Eloise firmly, Charles at her side with a young Ben held at gunpoint.
With his arms still around Juliet, James snapped, trying to make his voice a helluva lot louder than the kid's, "Richard here just helped save Juliet and her kid--so everyone needs to calm down, and back off."
Another tense few seconds passed, in which the newborn infant's voice only grew louder and louder, and Amy was the first to lower her weapon, along with the rest. A second later, Eloise nodded, and Charles shoved Ben to them, Sawyer grabbing the kid by the shoulder.
And with that, they went their separate ways, Richard and his people back to their camp, Juliet and her son and Sawyer back to what was left of Dharmaville.
"So, what's the squirt's name?"
Juliet slowly rested her head on James' shoulder; his arm hadn't left her side since they started the long march home.
With her son shuffling around in her arms and still crying, but softly now, Juliet murmured, "Isaac."
###
3 years later
Lara Chang was very patient with Isaac after he pointed a small finger at her growing stomach and demanded an explanation.
"I'm just having a baby." When Isaac crinkled his small nose, she added, "It might be a little boy or a girl for you to play with."
Later, the three-year-old interrupted his mother's poker game with Miles and Jamie.
"Where did Mrs. Chang get her baby?"
Isaac's dark eyes stared at Miles when his head immediately sank into the table. The child heard him groan, and Jamie laughed, patting the other man's head good-naturedly.
His mother just smiled that crooked smile of hers, and promised to tell him when he was older.
1 year later
Juliet was at the motor pool and James had a break in his shift--so it was him that got to pick up Isaac from the principal's office.
James' worries only increase when he found the dark haired, dark eyed kindergartener beat up, with a black eye, some bruises and cuts, his clothes torn and dirty. But the older boys next to him actually don't look much better off.
The principal just told him the obvious: Isaac and these first graders had gotten into a fight, and neither would say what it was about. Of course, they would all be sent home for the day.
Maybe against his better judgment, Sawyer tried to carry the kid home, once they were out of sight of Dharma's schoolhouse. Shit, the boy was only 4 and his legs were banged up too.
But Isaac had stubbornly and angrily refused his help, growling he was a big boy now. Sawyer was distinctly reminded of Juliet.
And so they both walked home, albeit slowly.
Still, James made him sit on the porch when he fixed him up with some first aid, ignoring the way the kid fidgeted, Isaac really just couldn't keep still for one damn minute.
"Gonna tell me what happened?"
Isaac nervously chewed his lip, but stayed silent.
"If you don't tell me, who's gonna get your mom to calm down?" At times, there wasn't much to pressing a kid's buttons the right way.
Grumbling something incomprehensible, Isaac finally started, "They were making fun of me."
"Go on."
"The same stupid name over and over again--"
"Don't sound very creative."
"It's because of my stupid eyes--"
James froze for a split second. Then hoping Isaac didn't notice, asked, "What do they call you?"
"'Guyliner,'" Isaac grumbled, and damned, if that didn't make Sawyer feel like a complete ass. Of course, he'd never even thought that about Isaac, but he'd thought and said it plenty of times about his old man (of course, anything said was always out of the boy's earshot). But still, it seemed an offense to the kid too, 'cause there was no denying Isaac had inherited his daddy's eyes--and his hair, and just, just everything, Isaac looked like he'd grow into the spitting image of Richard when he was older.
"And 'Eyeliner Boy' and they say even Mom's eyes aren't as girly like mine, and Tim sometimes calls me 'Faggot'--"
James briefly saw red--but then he just told Isaac there was nothin' wrong with his eyes, and that kids can be just stupid and cruel.
But Isaac still growled, now with a sniffle, "I hate my eyes."
###
"Isaac."
The boy froze from his place on a stool at the bathroom sink, turning to his mother framed in the door.
"What are you doing?"
"I--" and he instinctively lowered the scissors from his eyes with Juliet still staring him down. "I was just gonna cut my lashes," he mumbled.
James had told her about this before, and it had calmed her ire.
Juliet just sighed, removed the scissors from his small hand, then carried him out of the bathroom, and sat him on the couch.
"Isaac, your eyes are handsome." The boy just snorted, but Juliet knew he was lucky she hadn't gone with her first distinctive description, 'beautiful.'
"They're your father's, you know."
Isaac knew mom rarely talked about him. The boy asked, "Where is he?"
Juliet told him he died in a shipwreck, and that was that; for now, the boy felt too guilty to ask for more detail.
Later when trying to avoid her own guilt, Juliet shared what happened with Isaac and the scissors that afternoon with the others at the poker table.
"God, he's gonna be a nightmare when he's a teen, isn't he?" James muttered even as Miles snickered, and even Jin and Daniel laughed, while Juliet just gave a tired smile.
###
1 year later
In the morning, Juliet pressed her nose into James' back, her arms tight around his waist; the man rustled in the covers, pleased. They were barely awake, which suit them just fine--it was a real nice, sleepy morning--
Something bounced excitedly in their bed, and James moaned into his pillow, while Juliet moaned into his back.
But they groggily got up, and James even managed a smirk at Isaac's beaming face.
"What's up, Hotshot?"
"Must be the science fair, Ms. Distine was letting your class watch it today, wasn't she?" Juliet asked, smirking as she leaned against James, her eyes going up and down, watching her son bounce.
Rolling his eyes, Isaac said, "It's my birthday!"
"Really? Plain forgot about that," said James in a chipper, teasing voice, and Isaac just rolled his eyes again. The boy then stuck himself right in between his mother and Jamie. "Can I get pancakes for breakfast?"
"Sure," Juliet said, ruffling his dark hair.
"With ice cream?"
"No, that'll be later."
The phone rang, and Sawyer reached over, grabbing it.
"Yeah?" Minutes later, Sawyer shot Juliet a hard look, and she stiffened. Then her face grew impassive as James rushed out of bed and started dressing.
"What's wrong?" Isaac asked curiously, watching the man as Juliet began pulling him out of the bed.
"Just have these new recruits to meet, Hotshot. Last minute thing, you understand."
"Uh huh," Isaac said, though he really didn't. His mother took him to the kitchen, sitting him at the table. Isaac called out from there to the grown ups' bedroom, "Will Miles and Dan and Jin be with you when you get back?"
"Probably," James called back. When he rushed into the kitchen, he quickly hugged Isaac with one arm, told him happy birthday. Then Juliet gave him a hastily prepared breakfast for the road; she whispered, "did he say who--?" and James whispered back, "gonna find out now, Blondie;" and then they kissed, and James was out the door.