Focus
Focusing for a three am entry.
Well I had a bajillion thoughts then a few interesting IM conversations got rid of most of them. That and venting random mess into a super-secret entry. But I will keep the intensity for this entry, too.
So this close friend of mine in high school decided she didn't like how I was no longer going to church over the summer after we graduated and told me I talk to satan. Then she showed up at my party like I invited her after we hadn't spoken in a long time and I told her she had to leave because we last left it at you saying I talk to satan. Well we no longer spoke until she called me once for a two second phonecall in January. Then nothing else and it is November. So I just got an IM from her, not thinking she even knew my screen name. So I will continue to make small talk.
The other great IM I received was from David Garrett who is going to throw me a party next week just for the hell of it. I am excited.
Well to focus on what I am actually thinking is something relating to tragedy. This is the part where I include the time Nic said "you're such a fucking tragedy. shakespeare couldn't have written better." the only problem is that my life isn't as poetic or full of puns (at least when Ben isn't around). after that i responded to my own profile with "Fuck Tragedy, I'm the Hero, Bitches." Well I'm am out of resources. I have no energy or magic tricks. I am plumb tuckered out. My schedule doesn't allow much recuperation time until the weekend, so I have to stick through these next few days and hope there are enough moments between breathing to catch up with myself.
It's funny how important and effective sleep is.
I have been thinking about my directorial more and more. I really really like the random idea Dr. Chansky had. I wish I had something even more random and profound so it would be an original idea. I will work double hard in Italian.
Oh that brings me back to where I started! (Long entry forthcoming)
So Kerry lost. I can't bring myself to mention the president or what happened to how the election went for him because any of those words associated together bring me physical pain. I did my best to campaign when I could, though mostly for Badnarik. Oh well, there is no turning back from the hell we have elected and amended into our constitutions.
So immediately after that tragedy, I had another accident. I was upset about this for, well, the entire day. I don't trust myself driving anymore. I have to work out a plan for how to not have a car ever again. Mostly because I can't work enough hours to pay for the insurance. At least I'm not hurt. Sparing all the details, that's the only solution. Pleh. Eventually I will live in a large city and not need a car. Maybe even as soon as this summer I will live in NYC like Nic is encouraging. Plus the whole staying at a commune thing. Well at least I hinged my entire day on being able to recover if I didn't go to Acting and then recovering because I didn't go. Well recovering as best as possible. No more repeats of the day before opening night nervous breakdowns in the side lobby. I don't foresee missing another day of acting anyhow, and if I do, then it is the end of the world for me anyway because I need a good six months to follow this past six. Maybe there is some zodiac sign about this year being the year from hell. And maybe next year will be amazing? No, I remember now. Last year was kick ass. That's what it was. I can settle for an uneventful year next year, save for a commune trip, a good summer, meeting someone I love, working out a program abroad?, and getting to direct sinfonicron. Oh and bringing my cat to the apartment. I couldn't miss my cat anymore without dying. Seriously.
Shine On. This entry only took almost an hour to finish.
-Angelo
Well I had a bajillion thoughts then a few interesting IM conversations got rid of most of them. That and venting random mess into a super-secret entry. But I will keep the intensity for this entry, too.
So this close friend of mine in high school decided she didn't like how I was no longer going to church over the summer after we graduated and told me I talk to satan. Then she showed up at my party like I invited her after we hadn't spoken in a long time and I told her she had to leave because we last left it at you saying I talk to satan. Well we no longer spoke until she called me once for a two second phonecall in January. Then nothing else and it is November. So I just got an IM from her, not thinking she even knew my screen name. So I will continue to make small talk.
The other great IM I received was from David Garrett who is going to throw me a party next week just for the hell of it. I am excited.
Well to focus on what I am actually thinking is something relating to tragedy. This is the part where I include the time Nic said "you're such a fucking tragedy. shakespeare couldn't have written better." the only problem is that my life isn't as poetic or full of puns (at least when Ben isn't around). after that i responded to my own profile with "Fuck Tragedy, I'm the Hero, Bitches." Well I'm am out of resources. I have no energy or magic tricks. I am plumb tuckered out. My schedule doesn't allow much recuperation time until the weekend, so I have to stick through these next few days and hope there are enough moments between breathing to catch up with myself.
It's funny how important and effective sleep is.
I have been thinking about my directorial more and more. I really really like the random idea Dr. Chansky had. I wish I had something even more random and profound so it would be an original idea. I will work double hard in Italian.
Oh that brings me back to where I started! (Long entry forthcoming)
So Kerry lost. I can't bring myself to mention the president or what happened to how the election went for him because any of those words associated together bring me physical pain. I did my best to campaign when I could, though mostly for Badnarik. Oh well, there is no turning back from the hell we have elected and amended into our constitutions.
So immediately after that tragedy, I had another accident. I was upset about this for, well, the entire day. I don't trust myself driving anymore. I have to work out a plan for how to not have a car ever again. Mostly because I can't work enough hours to pay for the insurance. At least I'm not hurt. Sparing all the details, that's the only solution. Pleh. Eventually I will live in a large city and not need a car. Maybe even as soon as this summer I will live in NYC like Nic is encouraging. Plus the whole staying at a commune thing. Well at least I hinged my entire day on being able to recover if I didn't go to Acting and then recovering because I didn't go. Well recovering as best as possible. No more repeats of the day before opening night nervous breakdowns in the side lobby. I don't foresee missing another day of acting anyhow, and if I do, then it is the end of the world for me anyway because I need a good six months to follow this past six. Maybe there is some zodiac sign about this year being the year from hell. And maybe next year will be amazing? No, I remember now. Last year was kick ass. That's what it was. I can settle for an uneventful year next year, save for a commune trip, a good summer, meeting someone I love, working out a program abroad?, and getting to direct sinfonicron. Oh and bringing my cat to the apartment. I couldn't miss my cat anymore without dying. Seriously.
Shine On. This entry only took almost an hour to finish.
-Angelo