Fic: All That I Am (4/17)
Title: All That I Am (4/17)
Author: gradgirl (aka Ali)
Rating: PG-13 (what else?)
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Casey/Ali, Chris/Katie, appearances from Snyder clan and other OCs
Summary: Luke found almost everything with Reid. Is that enough?
Warnings: Sequel to Almost Everything. So you should read that one first.
Author’s Notes: Thank you taking the journey back into this universe with me. Also a huge thank you to reilaroo for your awesome beta work and slayerkitty for letting me give you presents. Constructive criticism and comments are appreciated. Thank you for reading. ~Ali
{ Chapter 1} { Chapter 2} { Chapter 3}
Chapter Four
“Well, Reid, how are you?” Bob Hughes greeted the younger man. Bob and Kim had been acting as hosts and proud grandparents. The party was a success, and he was slowly working his way through the crowd. He finally told Kim he needed to try to get a bite to eat before Reid ate all the food in their house.
Reid popped another of those pastries Casey recommended into his mouth. “Pretty good,” he mumbled over the food. “The kid didn’t cry or spit up on me at all during the service.”
Bob held back a sigh. Even after all three years, he still wasn’t used to all of Reid’s idiosyncrasies, although there had been some changes in his demeanor. Reid was a man with a soul, who cared deeply. Bob had suspected as much when he’d seen how difficult Noah’s surgery had been for him, the pain in his eyes after he had talked to the Snyders and Luke. Besides Katie, Bob was probably one of the few people who was not surprised when Reid had gone to Texas for his hearing before the medical board and returned married to Luke Snyder. When the young man had come to him two and half years ago to talk about Reid Oliver, Bob began to have his suspicions.
“Dr. Hughes?” Luke knocked softly on the door and stuck his head in the office.
Bob had seen the young man grow up and seen so many good and unfortunately tragic times as well. This current situation with Noah being one of those times. Bob had been seeing more of the young man, especially since Reid had told him that Luke Snyder was going to make Reid’s dreams for the new wing a reality. Bob had been somewhat surprised; he’d remembered the first few times Reid and Luke were around each other. It was like watching two caged animals about to attack one another. But Bob had wondered, knowing the kindness in Luke’s heart, if maybe the young man had seen it too, seen something in Reid: the hidden humanity.
“Yes, Luke, what can I do for you?”
Luke smiled that sad and shy smile of his as he made his way further into Bob’s office. “I know that this is probably none of my business, but as someone who cares about Noah, but more than that, as a major donor and board member of this new wing…”
“Yes?” Bob cut him off, although he had his suspicions about where this conversation would go.
“It’s about Dr. Oliver.”
Bob sighed. A day, sometimes a few hours, didn’t go by in which someone had come into Bob’s office and uttered those very words. Then Bob would have to use everything he had to assuage-or in the case of a few nurses and one of the interns to wipe away tears-and make the person feel better.
“He’s…” Luke stopped. Could he really do this? He had to. He promised the doctor that he would get the lawsuit dropped, and Lucinda just called him with a solution. Luke needed to get married, and he needed Dr. Oliver. “I know about the lawsuit,” Luke admitted.
Bob was surprised. He had tried to keep it concealed, especially for Dr. Oliver’s privacy. Also, the hospital had to protect its reputation. “Luke-”
The young man held up his hands. “I won’t tell anyone, I’m not here to gossip about Dr. Oliver. I was there when he got the papers,” Luke admitted. “Dr. Oliver…” He let out a breath. “I talked to my grandmother; she was able to get him a hearing down in Dallas, for the day after tomorrow. I want to help Dr. Oliver get these charges dropped.”
Bob wasn’t sure what to say. He knew from experience that Lucinda was extremely influential, and he suspected that Luke would do anything to help those that he cared about. The young man’s voice changed slightly when he mentioned Reid’s name. Luke’s voice didn’t hold the usual disdain or anger the way everyone else’s did. He knew that Luke said he was concerned for Noah’s surgery, and while Bob didn’t doubt that, he knew there was more to the story.
“Dr. Hughes…” The blonde nervously bit his lip for a moment. “Dr. Oliver will need a few days off, he mentioned… He expressed some concern that…well…the staff…”
“It’s procedure for a doctor to be put on suspension when malpractice charges are brought against him or her,” Bob noted matter-of-factly.
“That’s what you’ve been trying to tell him,” Luke deduced.
“Luke, what exactly is your relationship with Dr. Oliver?” Bob hadn’t meant to ask that, but he did have to wonder.
“I want to help.” He shrugged. “I know Dr. Oliver can be…” His voice trailed off and he smiled gently. He could still remember the way the brilliant man had shown his human side in that elevator. The fear and lack of control. He was human, but more than that, Luke knew Reid felt things so much, he cared…
A dozen emotions flickered through the young man’s eyes. Bob recognized that look. It was the same one his grandson, Casey, had whenever he talked about Alison Stewart.
“Let me do this for Dr. Oliver,” Luke finally said. “We need to get those charges dropped for Noah, for this wing and all the patients Dr. Oliver can save, and most of all, we need to do this for him.”
Bob agreed. “All right. We’ll clear his schedule. His assistant, Marissa Wilson, can do that. I’ll get in touch with her.”
“Great. Is it all right if I be the one to tell Dr. Oliver about the suspension? I know he’ll-”
“Of course. Tell Dr. Oliver good luck for me and we’ll see you both in a few days.”
“Thanks, Dr. Hughes.”
And four days later when Reid came back to work, crowing about how the charges were dropped, Bob noticed the shiny platinum band on the redhead’s hand immediately. He muttered something about marrying Luke, a terrible joke about being such a dedicated doctor that he would do anything to make sure he got everything he wanted for the new wing, but Bob knew differently.
“So is it true?” Reid asked.
Bob was pulled out of the past and tried to get a few bites of food in as well. He looked at Reid for a moment, not sure how much of the conversation he had missed. “Is what true, Reid?”
“Katie mentioned that you’re finally going to retire. Chris is interested in the job.”
The older man’s eyes widened slightly. Kim had been encouraging him to retire for several months. Mostly the conversations were done in passing, especially when she was tired of him being called to the hospital. He was even more surprised that Chris would be interested in the position.
“Well, Reid, you know better than to engage in hospital gossip. There was a rumor a few months ago about one of the nurses, Gretchen I believe it was, finding you and your husband using one of the rooms for… Well, let’s just say it wasn’t medical reasons.”
“Oh, that was true,” Reid noted with a shrug.
“I didn’t need to hear that,” Bob assured him. “And, yes, I have been considering retiring. As far as my replacement is concerned…” He gave the redhead an assessing look. “If I were to choose someone, then I would pick you.”
The food Reid was about to put into his mouth slipped out of his hands, landing on the floor, but the redhead didn’t appear to notice. “Me? I-I’m not. People don’t like me.”
A smile tugged at Bob’s lips for a moment.
“I’m nothing like you. Luke has been trying to get me to become…” He shuddered gently. “Human.”
This time Bob did smile. “You already are, Reid. I know you don’t want people to realize that, but Luke has already helped you. We all know you’re a brilliant doctor, but if Luke Snyder-”
“Oliver,” Reid quietly corrected him.
“Yes, if Luke Oliver hasn’t left you, then there’s hope for you yet. You’re a good leader; you run that neuro wing with skill and determination. You’ve hired some of the best people in the country, brought in the state of the art equipment, and you have constantly worked to improve your skill. Reid, you have this mentality of leading by who are you are. Granted, some of the staff…” Bob hesitated, searching for the right word. “Fear you, but everyone respects you.”
Reid honestly did not know how to respond. He felt his back straighten, pride working its way through his system. He knew he was brilliant. He was the best, Reid had never doubted that, but he had respected Bob almost immediately. And to hear Bob, a man who in some ways had become like a father and mentor, say all of those things…rarely outside of the operating room had Reid felt more proud. Reid quickly looked around, wanting to find Luke. He wanted his husband to be with him, to hear this.
“What about Chris?” Reid had to ask though.
“I love my son and he is a great doctor. But this kind of job…” Bob sighed. “He has a wife and two young children. He has proven that he wants to have roots, after so many years coming and going, Katie has grounded him, and I appreciate that. I shouldn’t say anything else on the subject. Reid, just consider it. I would like to recommend you to the board when I finally do retire. Would you agree?”
“I-I need to check with Luke.” Reid wasn’t sure if he or Bob was more surprised by his response. “I mean-”
Bob smiled. “As someone who has been married for…well, I thought twenty-eight years, but legally speaking, only three-”
Reid let out a bark of laughter. He still remembered the shock everyone felt when Bob and Kim’s marriage had been declared invalid at their anniversary party. There was good food there as well. He’d have to ask them who their caterer was.
“Anyway, I understand needing your spouse’s insights into this type of decision. Think about it. Talk to Luke and get back to me. In the meantime, I would appreciate it if you didn’t say anything to Chris, not until I have a chance to speak to him.”
“Yes.” Reid nodded his head in agreement.
*
Reid found Luke talking to Casey and Alison. “I want to go home,” he announced.
Luke smiled, used to the abrupt nature. “Could you say hello to Casey and Alison first?” he questioned.
“Hello, again Casey. You were right about those pastries. Alison, co-Godparent, hello,” he acknowledged the other couple and then reached for Luke’s hand. “I want to go home.”
“All right.” Luke let go of Reid’s hand as he gave Casey and Alison each a hug. “If you have time while you’re in town, we need to get together for dinner.”
“That would be great,” Alison assured him.
“Yeah, I can talk to you about medical school,” Reid offered.
She looked at the doctor in surprise. “Th-thank you. I’d appreciate any insight or advice.”
Luke reached for his husband’s hand and found himself beaming. This was the Reid he knew and loved, and he was so appreciative when those he cared about could see it in Reid as well. He didn’t want his husband to become the type of man who hugged and doled out advice like a fortune cookie, but he knew Reid did care. And when Reid cared, when he loved, there was nothing he wouldn’t do to help that person.
“Ready?” Reid asked.
“Yeah,” Luke whispered and pressed a kiss to his husband’s cheek. He took Reid’s hand and led him toward Katie.
“What are you doing?” Reid asked.
“We need to say good-bye to our hosts.”
“No, we don’t,” Reid insisted. “Remember this morning? You promised me rigid and methodical.”
Luke looked around before leaning in closer to Reid. “What do you think the shower was?” he whispered.
“Quick and dirty,” the redhead countered. “Come on, you can call Katie after I’m asleep and gossip about how cute the kid looked in his dress and all of that. I want to go home and take you to bed.”
“All right,” Luke decided. “Let’s go home.”
*
Lying in bed with Reid’s head resting against his chest, Luke realized he never expected to be this happy, and he knew that scared Reid. But for Luke, it was everything he had wanted. Well, almost everything. Some day this amazing life of theirs would include children.
Luke’s fingers tangled themselves into Reid’s hair, gently massaging his scalp. “I love you,” he murmured.
Reid’s eyes had drifted shut, and he idly ran his finger along the kidney scar on Luke’s side. He always thought of Luke as being invincible. His husband was a kid when they met, he had too much money and too much privilege
“Are you an alcoholic?”
The blonde finally looked at Reid. “I never really labeled myself as a drunk, but yeah. And on a night like tonight, you wouldn’t get me to stop. And I shouldn’t even start because I had a kidney transplant in high school. So-”
“You can’t and you shouldn’t drink at all.”
Reid had never been grateful to be proved wrong. But touching that scar, feeling Luke’s shiver, Reid was reminded of everything they had and what he had to work for. “You took your anti-rejection meds, right?” the redhead checked.
“Yeah, before we went to check on Katie and Bobby,” he whispered. Luke cherished these moments, laying in bed with Reid, holding his husband close, and sharing secrets. Once Luke had slept next to his husband, feeling the older man’s arms around him, he knew that he would never be able to sleep without him.
More than that, it was one of the rare times when Luke felt like he had Reid’s undivided attention. The doctor wasn’t working out the steps of his surgery, planning his next meal, detailing the complete incompetency of the interns and staff at Memorial.
“Bob Hughes wants to recommend me to the board as his replacement for Chief of Staff.”
Luke moved and tugged on Reid’s head, pulling so the older man could meet his gaze. “What?” he asked incredulously.
The older man offered a sheepish grin. “Bob-”
Luke slid down and brought Reid’s mouth to his for a kiss. “That’s…beyond amazing. Do you want it? What about Chris?”
Reid chuckled as Luke continued to pepper kisses against his face instead of allowing Reid a chance to respond.
“Hold on, hold on.” Taking the blonde’s cheeks in his hands, Reid pushed Luke back against the pillow. The older man rested his chin on Luke’s chest, his gaze meeting his husband’s. “It’s a lot to consider. I told him that you and I would have to talk. And as far as Chris, with Katie and the new kid, Bob doesn’t want to take Chris away from them.”
“Well, what about us?”
Reid’s eyes shifted from the left to the right. “What about us?”
“What about when we have kids?”
The redhead immediately jumped up, the sheet gathering around his waist. “What kids?”
Luke got up as well, and he tucked the sheet around himself. “The kids we’re going to have someday,” he said slowly as though English wasn’t Reid’s first language.
“Since when are we having kids?”
“Since when are we not?” Luke countered. He felt a tightness in his chest and tried to ignore it. “Reid, you like kids, don’t you? There are some weeks when Jacob practically lives here, the spare bedroom is full of his stuff. You’re Bobby’s Godfather, for pete’s sake.”
“But they go home at the end of the day. We are not in charge of their care, schooling, and medical expenses. They have parents that we send them home to,” Reid pointed out.
“And what was today about? You agreed to be Bobby’s Godfather.” Luke felt himself sputtering and losing control. This was one argument he couldn’t lose, but he didn’t know how to fight with Reid about this. Luke just knew he couldn’t give up this fight.
“Yes, and I will be there for the kid whenever he needs me, but if something happens to Chris and Katie…” He sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. He did not want to have this conversation. The day had started out so well and it was supposed to end even better. He wanted to lie back down, hold his husband, and go to sleep.
“Reid?”
“If something happens to Chris and Katie, then Casey and Alison will take the kids. We don’t… Luke, I don’t want to have children.”
The blonde’s mouth opened but no sound came out. Luke felt like Reid had punched him in the heart and he didn’t know how to recover from that. No one could hurt him or make him happier than his husband and in this moment, Luke felt pain. “Reid... How definite are you about this? Will you consider…”
Reid closed his eyes. The last thing he ever wanted was to see his husband hurt. And to know that he was the one doing it was too much. “Luke, no, I don’t want to have children. And yes, I’m not going to change my mind about this.”
Luke raced out of the bed and ran towards the bathroom. He couldn’t stay there with Reid, and he felt clammy and nauseous.
===========================
Thank you for reading. What did you think of Bob wanting Reid over Chris for Chief of Staff? And the children talk is just beginning… ~Ali
Onto Chapter Five...