i should really be asleep
still here in atlanta. abigail is sleeping, as always... she is the smart one who goes to bed and i am the ridiculous one who literally has absolutely nothing better to do than sleep but still just fucks around with her computer and/or cell phone all night. i mean i'm not even thinking about attempting homework or anything. i'm just NOT going to bed. i mean, thaaat's coooool.
diving is so much drama. it's tough to work so hard and so long for something that is so easy to fuck up in an instant. i think the way you have to look at it is that its not the one moment in the meet that really matters but the hours and hours you spent working on your dives and i hope in some ways on yourself that really matter. this sounds like i fucked up today, doesn't it? i didn't.. i actually had a great day. i made it to 1-meter finals in 7th (top 8 make finals), and hit all my dives to move up 2 spots to finish fifth. it was gratifying, especially since i didn't dive my best in prelims.
what is up with awkwardness? why is it that one day you can talk to someone for hours and it is wonderful and the next day you can barely get out 3 words to them and after those 3 words you want to kill yourself to escape the crushing awkwardness? and you both know it is awkward, and you both know that you want it to be not awkward and cool again, but for some reason there is nothing that either of you can do? i think every human being in the world needs to just peel off a layer or two of bullshit. maybe if we all just got some shit out in the open we would be happier as a species.
some people miss high school a lot. like they had these incredible high school experiences that they can't escape from almost. i loved high school, and all my friends from high school, and everything that high school was to me... but I don't really find myself thinking about it very often here at college. i feel like i am in a new time and a new place and i have opportunities for so many new and wonderful things that i didn't even imagine in high school. it's too bad that i don't seem to be taking advantage of them, or even seeing them really. are they even there? i suck.
please. if there is something you want to say to someone, say it. there is a very good chance that saying it will be the right thing to do.
diving is so much drama. it's tough to work so hard and so long for something that is so easy to fuck up in an instant. i think the way you have to look at it is that its not the one moment in the meet that really matters but the hours and hours you spent working on your dives and i hope in some ways on yourself that really matter. this sounds like i fucked up today, doesn't it? i didn't.. i actually had a great day. i made it to 1-meter finals in 7th (top 8 make finals), and hit all my dives to move up 2 spots to finish fifth. it was gratifying, especially since i didn't dive my best in prelims.
what is up with awkwardness? why is it that one day you can talk to someone for hours and it is wonderful and the next day you can barely get out 3 words to them and after those 3 words you want to kill yourself to escape the crushing awkwardness? and you both know it is awkward, and you both know that you want it to be not awkward and cool again, but for some reason there is nothing that either of you can do? i think every human being in the world needs to just peel off a layer or two of bullshit. maybe if we all just got some shit out in the open we would be happier as a species.
some people miss high school a lot. like they had these incredible high school experiences that they can't escape from almost. i loved high school, and all my friends from high school, and everything that high school was to me... but I don't really find myself thinking about it very often here at college. i feel like i am in a new time and a new place and i have opportunities for so many new and wonderful things that i didn't even imagine in high school. it's too bad that i don't seem to be taking advantage of them, or even seeing them really. are they even there? i suck.
please. if there is something you want to say to someone, say it. there is a very good chance that saying it will be the right thing to do.