(no subject)
Well, I should start off by saying I have been having a better life in the past couple days. I have learned new shit about my self and I just started to understand that girls are evil bitches... haha... But seriously they are. I mean I never noticed it before but if you think about it... they will go to every extent to make you feel uncomfortable with your self and your life. When I broke up with brandon people just went up to him and told him shit. He doesn't understand that half of the shit isn't true or either it is a lil' true but the truth can sometimes hurt people. I don't know why but sometimes I just think to myself... maybe I should start being all true and stop lieing to people just to please them. Most of them stab you in the back no matter what happens. Tonight Brandon got caught drunk. I don't understand him sometimes because he says he wants to stay here at Job Corps but then he goes and Drinks...? I mean I smoked pot once a little while ago and it was laced I don't know what with but it was the most scariest thing I've ever had done to me. Things are oblivious to my eyes sometimes because I don't understand shit like why people would lace weed. There already an effect and then you want people to trip for almost 4days... That's wrong in my eyes and a lot of peoples eyes. Today I called people and I was trying to get in touch with my dad. No matter what he did to me I forgive him. I love my dad because he is my dad and that is the only reason. I can't trust the man anymore. Not to be a selfish person but he was kind of selfish himself. I don't understand why he did all of that shit but maybe someday I will. I don't think that he understands how much he hurt me. I think about him all the time and it is actually pretty bad when your daughter has already accepted that you might die soon. I called his boss and I was like be truthful to me. Is my dad still sober and he said your dad is clean now. He won't even have a drink with me. My dad loves me so much and I just think it's because I'm always his little girl no matter what. I will write more tomarrow! I love you all... much love<3