Needs: Yours VS Mine

[gorgeous_greens]

     Everytime it doesn't work out between me and a guy, the guy says he needs time to himself. He needs time away from me. Now don't get me wrong! I fully understand the reason behind all of that. I honestly do. However, I'm almost the opposite. Maybe it's just because almost no one really talks to me as much as that person has. Maybe I just need

Comments

hmmm

[anonymous]

now the biased male response:

guys that have treated you that way are just being tactless. there are ways to deal with that situation with more consideration for your feelings. the need to never see you if they cant have you is simply a self-preservation tactic. Basically, these people need to learn to curb their emotions before they reach that level, or, learn that loving someone means caring about their emotions as much as your own. Obviously their love for you can be gauged by the fact that they are more concerned with their own sadness over not having you, than with the emotional trauma put on you by the abrupt and awkward end of the friednship. If they felt that way but KNEW it would not be reciprocated, then they probably should have just kept it to themselves to save you the burden. yes, its totally unfair to place a choice in front of you like "its all or nothing".

So rest assured there are quasi-inteliigent guys out there, we just tend to be a little emotionally inept sometimes.

Any guy who is only mature enough to deal with the situation in the way you described, is no guy you'd want to be with anyway.

I think, being a guy, the biggest thing I've learned is that I have to more carefully weigh the emotional consequences of my actions when it concerns romance- realized or potential. And that in relationships that have yet to happen- its often better to let it take its course passively- rather than share every feeling I have the second it happens. That doesnt mean I wont act- just that I'll try to be subtle about letting a girl know how I feel- that is until subtlety is pointless, unnecessary, or downright cowardice.

SO yeah...I dont know what this is supposed to make you feel- other than...cheer up...if you want it, do your part, and keep your eyes open- it'll happen.

-paul

Re: hmmm

[gorgeous_greens]

of course the quasi-intelligent guys out there are emotionally inept sometimes. because if they knew what to do and how to show it, that would make things easier. hehe :) But yeah, thanks for the "cheer up". sooner or later it'll happen.
xoxo,
Charlie