(no subject)
So classes are over on tuesday. High school is basically over.
I always loved Thursday nights, since grammar school cause it always meant that tomorrow was Friday. And waking up early on Fridays and going to classes on Fridays wasnt always that bad cause you knew that once that bell rang, the weekend began. And as I approach my last friday of classes in high school, and last friday of classes on that same street in Red Bank that I've been going to since the 4th grade, It has kind of hit me that it's all over. A huge phase of my life that I began when I was a nine year old, walking into St. James with my green sweater on inside out, and penny loafers on my feet. I remember being so scared that I wasnt going to make any friends, and that people would think I was mean or weird. I quickly made friends and met the faces that I have had surround me in a classroom every school day from then til now.
And on my last day of exams which is May 30th (i only have to take two exams! yay), I'll say goodbye to the halls and the stairways and the teachers and the lockers. I know i won't visit like some do, but it'll be a place that will represent a lot. It's so cliche, but i believe it's true for every high school experiance, you just grow up so much within those walls. I cant count how many momentous things happened in my life that I daydreamed about or talked about inside the classrooms or in the halls, or the friends I made there, the things i learned (sort of). I grew up. I'll just miss the little things like being able to walk into school and see my best friends, or see the people that I normally don't hang out with outside of school but love their company during class. And i can't see the crazy boys that I like to have in school crushes on.
The routine of the past four years, especially the last two years, always bored me. I kept thinking to myself if i had to drive that drive from my house to red bank one more time, i'd scream. But now I'm learning to enjoy it because I won't do it as much, certainly not at 745am. And coming home after school, knowing I'd see my Mom and we could spend the rest of the day together, or i could call a friend and we could go do something, or I could simply lay around my room. I'll miss that. I'll miss the comfort of being home and being around my things and waking up in the morning and giving my Mom a kiss goodbye before i go to school. The little things are really starting to bother me because they are all going to be over. And it's silly cause they will be over but so many new things are going to start.
Since I was little, I always did this thing where I'd hide inside myself. I'd become my own friend and if a situation was uncomfortable, I'd just imagine me hiding inside myself..It was all about trying to make myself feel stronger and braver. I was a wacko, but it would always work. I'd do it in a situation where my parents would be fighting, or If I was getting yelled at, or if I was trying not to cry. I feel like I'm going to have to use that method a lot in the future. In situations where I can't lean on a friend, or a family member. I'm going to be a grown up and I think i'm ready.
Once Prom is over and Graduation, summer is going to come and I'm excited for it. I just want to squeeze so much quality time in with my best friends and my family. And once August hits, it's going to be hard. Really hard. I'm horrible with goodbyes, and I learned from how I was with Mike last year that saying goodbye to my friends is going to be 10 times harder. And My mom..forget it. It's going to be hard, and I know she's scared and sad but she's not shwoing it. She's excited of course but It's going to be so different because she has never not been a Mom with a child in her house. Since she was my age, she's always had a kid to take care of and be with every day. But she's going to be good. She's entering a new phase also. With all of that said, It's such an incredible, exciting time in my life and I can't wait because once I recieve that diploma, it's like a gate of the future is being swung open HAHA. but i swear, that's how invision it.
I always loved Thursday nights, since grammar school cause it always meant that tomorrow was Friday. And waking up early on Fridays and going to classes on Fridays wasnt always that bad cause you knew that once that bell rang, the weekend began. And as I approach my last friday of classes in high school, and last friday of classes on that same street in Red Bank that I've been going to since the 4th grade, It has kind of hit me that it's all over. A huge phase of my life that I began when I was a nine year old, walking into St. James with my green sweater on inside out, and penny loafers on my feet. I remember being so scared that I wasnt going to make any friends, and that people would think I was mean or weird. I quickly made friends and met the faces that I have had surround me in a classroom every school day from then til now.
And on my last day of exams which is May 30th (i only have to take two exams! yay), I'll say goodbye to the halls and the stairways and the teachers and the lockers. I know i won't visit like some do, but it'll be a place that will represent a lot. It's so cliche, but i believe it's true for every high school experiance, you just grow up so much within those walls. I cant count how many momentous things happened in my life that I daydreamed about or talked about inside the classrooms or in the halls, or the friends I made there, the things i learned (sort of). I grew up. I'll just miss the little things like being able to walk into school and see my best friends, or see the people that I normally don't hang out with outside of school but love their company during class. And i can't see the crazy boys that I like to have in school crushes on.
The routine of the past four years, especially the last two years, always bored me. I kept thinking to myself if i had to drive that drive from my house to red bank one more time, i'd scream. But now I'm learning to enjoy it because I won't do it as much, certainly not at 745am. And coming home after school, knowing I'd see my Mom and we could spend the rest of the day together, or i could call a friend and we could go do something, or I could simply lay around my room. I'll miss that. I'll miss the comfort of being home and being around my things and waking up in the morning and giving my Mom a kiss goodbye before i go to school. The little things are really starting to bother me because they are all going to be over. And it's silly cause they will be over but so many new things are going to start.
Since I was little, I always did this thing where I'd hide inside myself. I'd become my own friend and if a situation was uncomfortable, I'd just imagine me hiding inside myself..It was all about trying to make myself feel stronger and braver. I was a wacko, but it would always work. I'd do it in a situation where my parents would be fighting, or If I was getting yelled at, or if I was trying not to cry. I feel like I'm going to have to use that method a lot in the future. In situations where I can't lean on a friend, or a family member. I'm going to be a grown up and I think i'm ready.
Once Prom is over and Graduation, summer is going to come and I'm excited for it. I just want to squeeze so much quality time in with my best friends and my family. And once August hits, it's going to be hard. Really hard. I'm horrible with goodbyes, and I learned from how I was with Mike last year that saying goodbye to my friends is going to be 10 times harder. And My mom..forget it. It's going to be hard, and I know she's scared and sad but she's not shwoing it. She's excited of course but It's going to be so different because she has never not been a Mom with a child in her house. Since she was my age, she's always had a kid to take care of and be with every day. But she's going to be good. She's entering a new phase also. With all of that said, It's such an incredible, exciting time in my life and I can't wait because once I recieve that diploma, it's like a gate of the future is being swung open HAHA. but i swear, that's how invision it.