Aug 14, 2009 00:48
i'm up. it's nearly 1 am, and i'm in the baby's room, reclining in the lazy boy.
it's getting harder and harder to fall asleep lately. granted, i'm exhausted. i'm just unable to get comfortable. hendrix is moving around all the time. he's SO MUCH BIGGER than he used to be. instead of giggling when he shifts (like i used to), i am now GRABBING MY BELLY and saying, "WHAT THE HELL, BB?" but, it's all good in the hood. this is still magic. it's just taking more out of me than it used to.
i'm noticing myself in this room a lot more. i come in to just sit , or refold clothes, or move books around. i'm trying to picture a little sleeping baby in this space. it's insane to me that he could be here in MERE WEEKS. it's crazy to even think of this process coming to an end. aside from the early bull shit, this has been amazing. i've felt honored to be pregnant, to be growing another life inside of myself.
we went through childbirth classes. it was a two day intensive thing. i don't think i would have enjoyed more than that, honestly. i mean, no one thought my jokes were funny. WHAT KIND OF WORLD IS THAT? & not to be all granola-elitist, but i was the only mother there with a midwife. there were 25 couples! THE ONLY ONE WITH A MIDWIFE!? insane. i guess this is peoria, il. idk what i was thinking, but seriously... crazy. the woman leading the class was a def. natural childbirth advocate, and we really learned a lot from her. eric is mad excited now. it's cute. he's completely GEARED UP for labor. after watching one of the movies, the instructor was like, "any observations?" and eric said, "labor is a very rhythmic process!" OUT LOUD. i thought it was just about the cutest thing i'd ever heard.
i kinda feel like there are a MILLION things to get ready/ buy. it's overwhelming. if any of you mamas have some solace to offer me here/ a list of EXTREMELY necessary things for me to buy before bb/ things i can wait for, please let me know. things i KNOW i still need: breast pump. grooming supplies. changing table cushion. diaper bag. tub. stroller. sling...
i'm going to bed. maybe right here. xoxo
pregnancy,
eric & me