(no subject)
constantly surrounded by sad girls, sad boys, sadness. but we are good at hiding it - happy girls! happy boys! happiness.
this is not to say i am either. there are some things that you learn when you are constantly surrounded by people. it is a neverending flow of messages, phone calls, ims. it is a constant reminder that you do not want to be alone: when you keep your phone on, your chat client on, your door unlocked.
here: there is snow. leaves turned down. girls in the other room sleeping. wine bottles that line the window sill.
there: (home) has warmer weather. lit skyscrapers. traffic. jay-jay-jay walking! beautiful glasses of bellinis.
in the car: from maine to new hampshire, we talked about memories. there were three boys (and I). i am not good at speaking, at explaining out loud. some days are better than others. we spew out memories, intricate details and take it all in. silently.
here is mine:
he said, "let me show you my favourite spot." so we left his apartment building and climbed up rocks. it was about a two minute climb. the rocks were big, but you still had to be careful. it was windy up there. overlooking condos, the beach, water. and as i stood there, all i could think was, we are not feeling the same things even though we're there together at the exact same moment, looking at the exact same thing.