(no subject)
I really need to sleep more before classes. You guys are probably familiar with the flow of conscious rants I do, where I start on one subject but god alone knows what topic I’ll end up on. Those rants of mine are usually done when I’m tired. When I’m awake, I have a little man in my head who acts as my censor. He just kinda sits there going ‘What kind of asshole are you to even think of that? Don’t actually write it!’ When I’m tired that little guy is asleep so whatever pops in my mind just spews out. Normally this isn't a problem because I don't really care that much what people think of me, so whatever. However in certain situations it's definately a bad thing, like for example in class.
Last night I had about two hours of sleep before I had to get up and go to class. In my business class the teacher had us write down three to five things that annoy us. My little censor guy was still passed out, so here’s the list that I wrote, but probably shouldn't have:
- My wife
- My pets
- Idiots
- Answering questions in class
After we made the list, she had us pass it to another person in class. Then the other person was supposed to brainstorm some business idea based on something in our list. It's a stupid assignment, but that’s the type of crap you get when you got in a basic first year business class. Anyway, I exchanged with a person and their list also had ‘idiots’.
At this point a business plan to eliminate idiots pops in my mind. I check with the little censor dude and he sleepily waves his hand in a 'do whatever dude, I'm trying to catch some Z's here' gesture. So I go ahead an develop the following plan: First of all, develop an implantable birth control devise that lasts a lifetime. We already have shit like Norplant which lasts 5 years IIRC, so we're already on our way. Once you have the lifetime birth control, you start implanting it in all babies at birth. That’s all, nothing more needs to be done. The intelligent people will figure out a way to remove/bypass the birth control and thus spread their genes. The stupid people won't be able to figure it out, thus will not spread their genes. In a generation or two most of the idiocy genes will have been removed from the population and the average IQ should skyrocket. The profit would come from two sources, first of all government contracts to do the implants. Secondly, an advertising blitz could be done about how reducing the number of people in the world is ecological since less people = less CO2 (that's a real argument by the way, read an opinion article on The Economist that said africans, chinese, and indians should use condoms for exactly this reason. Nice to know racism is alive and well in our high class news sources). With this advertising blitz I'd ask for donations to aid in my environmental cause. Kinda like Greenpeace without the whole parking my boat on a nuclear test site thing.
Fortunately I do well on the test and homework. She grades on classroom participation, but I believe that's based on if you do participate rather than the quality of your participation or if she wishes you'd stop participating. Still, I need to give Mr Censor a few jolts of caffeine before that class in the future, apparently his job is more important than I originally thought.
- EDIT -
My wife's reaction was funny. Cut n paste from the IRC log of it:
YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE!
what?
Last night I had about two hours of sleep before I had to get up and go to class. In my business class the teacher had us write down three to five things that annoy us. My little censor guy was still passed out, so here’s the list that I wrote, but probably shouldn't have:
- My wife
- My pets
- Idiots
- Answering questions in class
Oh. that. Yeah. Mr Censor guy was asleep.
I like how not only did I make the list, but I was FIRST. Shithead. XD
You know I love you.
Which is godix speak for 'oh crap, I'm gonna get hurt for this one'
You'll have to fall asleep sometime... >:)
Last night I had about two hours of sleep before I had to get up and go to class. In my business class the teacher had us write down three to five things that annoy us. My little censor guy was still passed out, so here’s the list that I wrote, but probably shouldn't have:
- My wife
- My pets
- Idiots
- Answering questions in class
After we made the list, she had us pass it to another person in class. Then the other person was supposed to brainstorm some business idea based on something in our list. It's a stupid assignment, but that’s the type of crap you get when you got in a basic first year business class. Anyway, I exchanged with a person and their list also had ‘idiots’.
At this point a business plan to eliminate idiots pops in my mind. I check with the little censor dude and he sleepily waves his hand in a 'do whatever dude, I'm trying to catch some Z's here' gesture. So I go ahead an develop the following plan: First of all, develop an implantable birth control devise that lasts a lifetime. We already have shit like Norplant which lasts 5 years IIRC, so we're already on our way. Once you have the lifetime birth control, you start implanting it in all babies at birth. That’s all, nothing more needs to be done. The intelligent people will figure out a way to remove/bypass the birth control and thus spread their genes. The stupid people won't be able to figure it out, thus will not spread their genes. In a generation or two most of the idiocy genes will have been removed from the population and the average IQ should skyrocket. The profit would come from two sources, first of all government contracts to do the implants. Secondly, an advertising blitz could be done about how reducing the number of people in the world is ecological since less people = less CO2 (that's a real argument by the way, read an opinion article on The Economist that said africans, chinese, and indians should use condoms for exactly this reason. Nice to know racism is alive and well in our high class news sources). With this advertising blitz I'd ask for donations to aid in my environmental cause. Kinda like Greenpeace without the whole parking my boat on a nuclear test site thing.
Fortunately I do well on the test and homework. She grades on classroom participation, but I believe that's based on if you do participate rather than the quality of your participation or if she wishes you'd stop participating. Still, I need to give Mr Censor a few jolts of caffeine before that class in the future, apparently his job is more important than I originally thought.
- EDIT -
My wife's reaction was funny. Cut n paste from the IRC log of it:
YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE!
what?
Last night I had about two hours of sleep before I had to get up and go to class. In my business class the teacher had us write down three to five things that annoy us. My little censor guy was still passed out, so here’s the list that I wrote, but probably shouldn't have:
- My wife
- My pets
- Idiots
- Answering questions in class
Oh. that. Yeah. Mr Censor guy was asleep.
I like how not only did I make the list, but I was FIRST. Shithead. XD
You know I love you.
Which is godix speak for 'oh crap, I'm gonna get hurt for this one'
You'll have to fall asleep sometime... >:)