it's been awhile
it's been awhile since an update...oh well. I knew that's how it would be when i started doin this shizzle. i hate it. sometimes life is the complete opposite of the holocaust but within moments it can be terribly uncool. it seems like last night i was thinkin.. wow life is pretty outrageously sweet, but today i was thinking dude this sucks. I can't wait till baseball season starts, not just to play but to watch it. I wanna go to a bunch of games this year. i get my license soon too. I think when i get my license i'm gonna try to start dating. i'm sick of seeing other people with their "partner's" i don't know if i really want someone to hold though. i think i just want someone to hang out with, someone who shares enough of the same interests to carry an awesome conversation but also share completely opposite interests so we can show each other new things. experience something new. Maybe change a life or two. I just want someone who cares but doesn't care too much. I know it can't be perfect. I know that if i found someone like that, that it would most likely turn out to be something more if it was meant to be, but if thats how it works out then that's okay. I just don't want to date someone expecting it to become more. I want a realationship that is carried by it's own momentum not expectation.I know people who say, wow i'd like to get to know her. and then every time a week later they do and they're "going out" Every time. Then a week or two later they're done.I want someone cool, pretty, at least a little smart, doesn't have to be funny but has to be able to laugh, like's baseball, like's a crowd, and is just in it for fun and if something happens...... great. I'm not looking for love. I'm really looking for a female friend with a chance for something more. it's not that i need a friend, i have plenty of those. It's the fact that it COULD become something more that has me, but if it doesn't then that cool because then it's another cool friend.