freezing...
its so cold this morning i am sitting here with a hooded sweatshirt on... cant believe its August... feels like October... brrrrr...
and today is James's birthday... 42 today... the boys getting old...
although the letter i sent him perhaps wouldnt fall under the category of "relax" most all my other actions would...
with him... they are probably too relaxed... i hate thinking that if something is going to happen i am the one who is going to have to make it happen...
but today is his birthday... so i have to wonder... should i pick up the phone this morning and call him to wish him a Happy Birthday...
his mom is taking him out for the day... and i am working tonight... more than likely he will stop by to see me tho later tonight... when i am working... i know his nights off off happen to be the nights that i work... but i want to see him when i am not working... oh well...
ok... just deleted a million words, lol, lol... yep... an hours worth of sitting here just writing... about my slavery... something that i dont write about anymore...
my concerns, my confusion, my wonderings that i feel at times...
so easily i go delete and everything vanishes... like flushing a toilet, lol... poof its gone...
weird that i feel so much better when i just delete those words now...
one day i shall have to analyze that fact, lol... but not today...
and today is James's birthday... 42 today... the boys getting old...
although the letter i sent him perhaps wouldnt fall under the category of "relax" most all my other actions would...
with him... they are probably too relaxed... i hate thinking that if something is going to happen i am the one who is going to have to make it happen...
but today is his birthday... so i have to wonder... should i pick up the phone this morning and call him to wish him a Happy Birthday...
his mom is taking him out for the day... and i am working tonight... more than likely he will stop by to see me tho later tonight... when i am working... i know his nights off off happen to be the nights that i work... but i want to see him when i am not working... oh well...
ok... just deleted a million words, lol, lol... yep... an hours worth of sitting here just writing... about my slavery... something that i dont write about anymore...
my concerns, my confusion, my wonderings that i feel at times...
so easily i go delete and everything vanishes... like flushing a toilet, lol... poof its gone...
weird that i feel so much better when i just delete those words now...
one day i shall have to analyze that fact, lol... but not today...