Finally.
One month.
One month from now, I'll be taking my NACES (cna certification) test.
One month from now, I'll be able to do this completely on my own.
One month from now, he will have been two months gone.
One month from now, I may be opening my heart to someone new (we'll see).
One month from now, I'm so tired of saying that.
One month ago... David left, went back to Iowa. The day before my birthday, in fact. I spent a month crying, begging, pleading. I'm not sure why I did that. I now realize that I spent a month telling myself that I couldn't do it...but I did it, and quite well, too. I've come a long way since David left. I just hope I can keep moving up, not let my depression get the best of me, and keep pretending like its OK to be doing this by myself. I'll be a nurse aide in a month. I can go back to school once I have that little piece of paper saying I passed this silly state test. I can get a GOOD job, I can support myself. I can stop hoping he will come back. What will happen with us in the future, I don't know. He beat me, he used me, he made me feel horrible about myself. But there will be a little weak spot in me that will always love him. If he does come back... I don't know what choice I'll make.
But for now!
One month. And hopefully this will all go away.
One month from now, I'll be taking my NACES (cna certification) test.
One month from now, I'll be able to do this completely on my own.
One month from now, he will have been two months gone.
One month from now, I may be opening my heart to someone new (we'll see).
One month from now, I'm so tired of saying that.
One month ago... David left, went back to Iowa. The day before my birthday, in fact. I spent a month crying, begging, pleading. I'm not sure why I did that. I now realize that I spent a month telling myself that I couldn't do it...but I did it, and quite well, too. I've come a long way since David left. I just hope I can keep moving up, not let my depression get the best of me, and keep pretending like its OK to be doing this by myself. I'll be a nurse aide in a month. I can go back to school once I have that little piece of paper saying I passed this silly state test. I can get a GOOD job, I can support myself. I can stop hoping he will come back. What will happen with us in the future, I don't know. He beat me, he used me, he made me feel horrible about myself. But there will be a little weak spot in me that will always love him. If he does come back... I don't know what choice I'll make.
But for now!
One month. And hopefully this will all go away.