February 7, 2009: Selfish
I am surprised to find out how easy being selfish is, as well as how hard being focused and persistant can be.
However, I still think I ought try not to hope or plan or dream of reality too much. Dreams not coming true hurts too much. As long as the dreams remain tales in my mind or on paper that I don't wait to happen, they remain safe. Once a hope becomes a plan, the poor persons within that plan are bound to err, usually not knowing what they have done, and the world comes crashing down around me. Planning that which I can control is safer, as I think many people would agree, but it is not always happier. Surprises, such as when someone actually does something I wish they would, without being told, are wonderful, happy things. Sadly, if several of such surprises happen within a short span of time, I become inured to their effect and must be taught, again, what the worth of such a surprise truly is.
However, I still think I ought try not to hope or plan or dream of reality too much. Dreams not coming true hurts too much. As long as the dreams remain tales in my mind or on paper that I don't wait to happen, they remain safe. Once a hope becomes a plan, the poor persons within that plan are bound to err, usually not knowing what they have done, and the world comes crashing down around me. Planning that which I can control is safer, as I think many people would agree, but it is not always happier. Surprises, such as when someone actually does something I wish they would, without being told, are wonderful, happy things. Sadly, if several of such surprises happen within a short span of time, I become inured to their effect and must be taught, again, what the worth of such a surprise truly is.