i have been in you, baby, and you have been in me too, that's true

[gnashsang]

THE CROOKEDEST STREET IN THE WORLD - PT CXXXII

gary won the scrabble game naturally, he said, gloating over his win. jack tried to spell provocation with two As instead, and drew wrote the word deaf three times using one of the Ds twice. jack said it wasn't right, but there weren't any rules they could find about using the same word over and over again. gary spelled deafening by adding letters to what drew put down, awarding a triple letter score, and that sealed the game. no one had used all seven of their tiles, however, and that made gary a little upset.

"i almost had it with abdicate, but drew had the damn D. i was stuck with the Z instead!"

"well, i'd've let you used abzicate, if you let me keep provacation," jack sniffed, wiping up a smear of chocolate that had wound up on his lips. they were going to wait for ennis to come back before they made dessert, but drew said "fuck it," and went in the forest to find sticks.

they roasted the marshmallows over a tiny fire, piling up only smaller sticks because they forgot to buy firewood earlier in the day. when ennis strolled back into camp, he laughed at its smallness; although the pile of coals was glowing red, it was only the size of a dessert plate.

"don't knock it," signed drew, "it works." he handed ennis a stick with a fresh marshmallow, pointing to to the chocolate and graham crackers.



ennis said the hike to bobby's camp wasn't all that bad at all, and told them how beautiful it was in the spot he'd found. he told jack they should go there early to wake him up, that jack would like the little meadow, and that bobby asked him to save some chocolate. he also told his friends that nicky said goodnight, that he was worn out and that he'd see them in the morning.

gary said he wanted to see the bobby's campsite too, until he heard about steep climb up. "almost as long as lombard street? forget that!"

"worth it though, it's a magical spot." ennis turned his marshmallow around to toast the other side.

drew asked if bobby would be okay all alone in the middle of the night. "with the wolves."

jack's made a face of disapproval. "wolves?"

"oh, he'll be fine, he's got the police whistle henry gave him. i told him to blow it if he needed help."

jack jerked when the saw the flames erupt. "hey, your marshmallow's on fire!"

ennis slowly raised his stick, puckered his lips and blew the flame out. "it's okay, it's not that bad, it's perfect because... because i like it like that." then he popped the whole thing in his mouth without making a s'more.

when gary said it was time for bed, drew effectively smothered the fire by placing an empty coffee can over the coals. they all four brushed their teeth by moonlight, saying nothing until gary lost the toothpaste cap in the dirt. when it was found they wiped their feet and crawled into kermie.

some of the other campers were still making noise, they heard a car honk twice and heard children screaming, but somewhere amid the din, the snake river was speaking out. ennis peeked out the window and saw that the RV in space 16 was empty with not a soul in sight.

drew came out of the RV restroom in his robe, his hair wet from having taken a quick, cool shower before heading to bed. he saw ennis up front, sitting by himself in the passenger seat with a light on overhead. he peeked his head through the cabin doorway to sign goodnight.

"sleep tight," ennis said, smiling up at his friend.

"love you bunches" drew answered in his usual way.

ennis nodded. he turned off the light and put the campground map away. he was already thinking of fishing some, thinking of getting away. he uncapped the flask of whisky that gary kept hidden, hoping there was something left. there was, and he drained the stainless steel container with two big gulps, wiping his lips with a clenched fist.

when ennis stood below the top bunk where was love was waiting, he looked through a part in the curtain and let his breath be taken away. jack was nude, glowing from the tiny headlamp flooding softly onto his torso. he was propped on pillows, hips turned a little sideways. ennis saw that jack was soft and hanging; his thighs, smooth and creamy, were sweet-talking ennis into submission in their seductive way. he breathed in deep through whisky lips at the wondorous, beautiful sight.

jack ran his hand across his body, pulling at the few brown hairs that swirled past the bellybutton before they faded into softness.

"jack," ennis whispered so softly nobody heard it, "if you only knew how much i love you."

ennis parted the curtain slowly now that jack had closed his eyes. his pink aura was apparent, even with the glow from the lamp. when jack lifted a leg up, ennis saw the hickey from two nights before and noticed it was fading. ennis undressed as he usually did before climbing up to bed, leaving his clothes in a rumpled pile on the empty dinette cushions. jack heard the zipper of his jeans being pulled, and opened his eyes lazily to murmur a word.

"hey."

"hey, darlin," ennis said when their eyes met.

"been waitin for you a long time."

ennis smiled, a little fuzzy from the alcohol, but it couldn't make him less of a lover to the one that swept him away three years ago, when he was wet and down from the rain and cold, when his chest hurt so much from the bicycle fall.

"turn the light off, baby," ennis asked nicely, "i want to watch your aura grow."

"okay."

ennis practically soared into the top bunk, to take jack in his arms like they were both falling now.

"you've been drinking, ennis," murmured jack into the damp curls at the base of ennis's neck. they were wound tight in a hug with all their limbs entangled and tight around each other.

"just two slugs from gary's flask, i drained it."

"i'm a little buzzed too," jack admitted, "i had a big gin and tonic."

"gin?"

"uh huh."

thought you said you didn't drink gin because it made you crazy."

"crazy for you, that's all. now slide over, let me wash your body."

jack opened the rubbermaid container he'd filled with warm water and lightly scented with drops of almond soap from bottle of dr. bronner's. he wrung out the washcloth, then spread it out over his open hand.

"i'll start with your back, so i can finish up with your tummy. roll over."

jack took the rag and ran it across ennis's muscles, rubbing the dark blue fabric over the pink-glowing skin.

"i'm chasing your aura, but it keeps coming back," whispered jack, giggling. "it's like those jellyfish we saw at the aquarium that light up from inside."

jack then used the towel on ennis's face on one side, making the smile frown and the eye chinese, making the nose flat when pushing down. an ear was tugged, the sideburn smoothed out. then ennis turned his head around so jack could wash the other side.

"mmmm," ennis said, after the cloth was rinsed and wrung and it slithered between his crack. warm water ran down his thighs on the inside and tickled his legs on the back. he lifted his calves one by one and wiggled his toes in delight, but jack told him he would save the dirty feet for last.

"front side," jack demanded, slapping ennis's ass.

ennis complied.

"i caught a big fish!" jack acted surprised when ennis made it jump up a few times, "it's still alive."

"you gonna eat it like a fish stick, jack twist?"

jack didn't answer. he ran the washcloth over ennis's chest and stomach, on his hips, his upper thighs, lifting up the trout with one hand so he could wash the skin on the underside. rinse, wring, repeat. now ennis's arms were held out, jack did one, then crawled over ennis to the other side, did the other one, from the shoulder down, past his elbow onto the wrist, which he kissed two times. then the hand, the palm, the knuckles, each finger one by one. when he was done, he sucked the thumb on ennis's right hand for a while.

'"mmmmmmm," ennis said, his eyes getting droopy.

jack hovered over and the legs got washed -- knees scrubbed, the shins, and finally the feet came last. jack paid extra attention to this part, rinsing the rag twice since ennis's feet were so brown. when he was done they were clean enough to suck, and he did, at least for a little while. ennis snickered, then giggled, then laughed out, loud and hard.

there was a thumping sound. it was gary. "quiet, you guys, i don't have my earplugs in tonight." he'd been listening to their love-talk and smiling, but was done now.

"sorry, gary-san," ennis said in bobby's voice, then jack bit ennis's big toe and this made him laugh harder.

gary groaned. "never a dull moment."

"shhhhhh," jack said, kissing ennis on the heart and dropping the washcloth in the water. he sealed the lid of the storage container with a burp and reached out of the bunk with an arm and half his body and placed the box on the dinette table without a sound. when he rolled back into bed, ennis was lightly snoring.

"ennis?" jack whispered into an ear, "you sleepin?"

ennis tried to open his eyes but they just wouldn't flicker strong enough. his arm, which had been gripping jack's thigh, was now loose, the fingers slipping. he mumbled a no, then his mouth parted.

jack wrapped his body alongside, kissing a cheekbone, asking ennis if he was too tired.

ennis shook his head no, then nodded. "mmsleepynow," he mumbled as he tried to hold jack in a hug.

"s'allright, ennis. you want to sleep inside me tonight?"

ennis mumbled something and turned on his shoulder. jack turned too, so they were like two fish side by side, and he lifted one leg to catch the big fish tight between his thighs. it didn't take much to coax ennis to start pumping, but he did fall asleep in a matter of minutes, and for real a final time.

only then did jack scoot forward to reach back and grab what he prized, and he arched his back slightly until the contact was precise. when jack pulled down on the ample foreskin, it released a flood of juices stored inside, and jack's mouth opened but he did not gasp as he pushed back with his hips and closed his eyes.

finding a hand belonging to ennis, jack grabbed onto it tightly, pulling it around his chest and sucking the thumb a second time.

with ennis passed out, but hard, jack was able to fantasize. he was sleeping deep below on a stranded pirate vessel, tight in the arms of a drunken captain of the hold. jack was his bosun, dropping anchor as duty required, making sure their ship was solid against the perilous tides.

a gentle rolling commenced, and the green and white vessel swayed with the motion. a rock was hit but jack was not torn -- he rocked slowly fore and aft as the captain started to dream, eyelids fluttering against the brightness of never ending seas. as the night went on a froth built up and their little ship suffered a leak, but jack was there with his sails stretched taut as the hurricane increased.

he caught what he could in his hand and sipped it in, never once letting go of his captain. when dawn did break and his fantasy ended, ennis was still inside him.

the captain was awake, a little groggy, the pink light shrouding them now invisible for the most part. he eased out, then in again slowly to make sure jack suffered no pain. when he was satisfied, the drilling began. his hand went around his lover's thighs. he guided his lucky piston, in and out, listening to his lover's snoring, the breathing deeper when the tummy rumbled from being rearranged inside.

"i love you all ways," ennis whispered, pushing jack onto his stomach so tenderly the sleeping monkey did not rise. ennis trembled as he sunk in deep into his sleeping lover, surrounded by a hundred degrees, the cool morning air on his back contrasting with the heat he felt inside. it didn't take too long for ennis to jerk a few times, expelling his love with a final, soft shudder.

jack was awakened by a kiss on the neck by his lover. "ennnnnnis," he breathed in, "good mmmmorning."

"mmm, mornin jack twist, you never left me last night, did you?"

"nuh-uh." jack shook his head, eyes blinking as he stared at the curtains that offered them privacy, pushing back onto what was inside his body. a shudder again, and more of ennis swelled and secreted to lubricate the glide.

"did i cum?" jack asked, trying to look down past his chest, but ennis's arm was still locked against his heart.

ennis opened his hand where it was still warm and creamy, and said yes, two times.

jack sipped without being asked, tasting iron and marshmallow, until the fingers that tickled his morning dreams were fully cleaned off.

"still sleepy, ennis?" jack asked, when he felt his lover not stirring for a while.

"no, just happy."

"want me to stay put?"

"mm-hmm, for always, darlin."

they did nap again, but jack said his shoulder was sore, so ennis just hugged him tightly so they could over as one toward the long, skinny window.

jack let the daylight rouse his senses as he looked out. he saw two figures in red and black buffalo plaid shirts standing by the RV in space sixteen. they were both men, and they couldn't have been more than thirty.

"our neighbors are back."

ennis lifted his head and nodded. "twins, ain't they?"

"yeah, i think. or brothers exactly nine months apart. look what they're wearing."

ennis then noticed the shirts, and glanced down to find matching green hot pants and bright pink high heeled shoes. he started laughing hysterically.

"ennis, wake up!" said jack, you're gonna make gary mad again."

"huh?" ennis had climbed on top in his sleep, and was as hard as a rock and imbedded deeply inside jack.

"shhhh, you were dreaming, you woke me up with your laughing. oh god, ennis, look what you did." jack raised up a little bit and looked down under his chest. "oh jeez, let me side over a little bit, ennis."

ennis saw why, and knew jack hated sleeping on the wet spot. "oh my, it looks like the monkey made a big mess."

"no, you made it, you fucked it out of me big time. we'll have to wash the sheets now."

ennis flexed, made jack moan loudly, then started rocking his hips.

"ennis... it's too early, we're gonna wake up gary if, if... ohh, ohhhkay i guess." jack folded his head in his arms, resting on his stomach. his eyes were closed, yet he felt the pink light still swirling all over their bodies. "mmmm, you're not so sleepy anymore, are you."

ennis grunted no and stuck a hand in front of jack's face, found his lips open in the dim light of dawn and thrust in three fingers. jack's tongue, working the pads of the tips, his nails and knuckles, sucking them hard and trying to swallow the digits, made ennis pick up the pace, long strokes growing shorter, quick stabs reaching deeper.

ennis gave jack a serving of exactly what he needed -- stuffed and trussed until monkey was transformed into one heavenly sigh borne of desire: a street wise villain whose heart of gold offered all that he had to give and more; love without question or restraint, their silver cord-connected souls tangled and wound delightfully. a song in the key of C full of caring and compassion, for concern without any minor chords, although they did miss on occasion; a song practiced as much as life allowed. a love composed by the gods above, and aided by thousands of unseen angels working hard.

"the sheets," jack wailed around the fingers in his mouth as his body jerked and tiny sparkles in his head started bursting. they trailed like sinking fireflies dying from the heat, yet they did so softly with the vigor jack required, with what they both desired, and by any means necessary despite all the unknown reasons outside of their realm of knowledge.

"we belong," ennis said, when jack asked why they were so mad for each other and how they did it -- stayed together so long, all the time -- he was needing clues and wanting answers when he was finally able to open his eyes. ennis peppered jack's cheek with kisses, "we just do, i can't tell you why."

it was almost painful for ennis to extract himself from jack's body for they had become one, and to hear jack groan when he did slip out was almost tortuous on this idaho morning. their hands stayed clasped a longer time, bodies still twitching as their bliss wound down, at least until they smelled the coffee.

IIII

gary leaned over to kiss drew's cheek and saw the light in the blue eyes as they fluttered open. it was something found ever-appealing, their pre-dawn ritual of making love without speaking. "morning, glory," he mouthed silently, waiting for the pucker of pink lips to finalize the greeting.

bobby woke up with a start right when jack wiped the tears from ennis's eyes. he soon realized he was only dreaming, yet he'd heard their voices clearly, as if they were outside his tent talking. he found his own eyes were wetted, but not because he was lonely -- for he knew in both his heart and mind that their souls were finally joining.

nicky stayed sleeping in his own tent, his small body warm and dry inside his bedroll. it wasn't his time to feel the love that jack and ennis transmitted so freely, but there was a change on this morning. for the first time in his life, as far as he remembered, he dreamed of killing. but it wasn't a human being -- the beautiful chicken in his hand was bleeding, and he cried and cried until the nightmare shifted. now his friends joined him at a round table; they were feasting on chicken and dumplings with potatoes and gravy. one white feather suddenly appeared in his field of vision, but it was only the edge of the pillow tickling the growing beard on his chin.

in another state, the one called wyoming, were twins named danny and donny. they were wearing flannel pajamas and shared a bunk bed in a big room painted with forest scenes. one of them, danny, climbed up in the middle of the night to comfort his brother donny, who'd slept fitfully when the moon slipped past midnight. they were both dreaming the same dream when morning had broken light, smelling pine trees in a mutable world, listening with deaf ears to the river churning.

snowball the cat was also affected as he waited for mrs. clump to appear. he'd gotten used to her by now, coming by every day at eight o'clock in the morning. she did what he wanted her to do, which was go out and buy some little fancy tins of cat food -- she was told by gary to feed dry food only, but she went to the store and broke that rule. snowball stretched and yawned, then stared up at the red disk in the window of the living room. it was rotating slowly, but he wasn't spooked by the movement. it reminded him that he wasn't alone, and it was doing what it was designed to do.

IIII

jack, drew and gary left early the next morning, taking towels and quarters along with them to find the campground showers. nicky was just a little distraught when he saw bobby at the table with ennis. he'd poked his head into the RV, and poked it out immediately.

"what's up with him?"

"maybe he didn't get enough sleep."

"bullshit. he was snoring like a bear when i walked past his tent."

ennis shifted in his seat, till his forehead almost touched bobby. "look, i'm going to tell you a secret i heard last night. nick didn't want me to tell you, but--"

"NICKY!" screamed bobby, and the door to RV opened immediately.

"what?"

"are you high?"

"no, not yet."

"then get in here."

ennis grumbled, but bobby patted his knee. once nicky was sitting beside them, bobby grabbed his hand too and said ennis wanted to tell him the secret.

nicky shot daggers at ennis, but bobby asked him to chill like a villain. "secrets aren't good if we hold them in, so ennis wants to tell me what you said to him. is that okay?"

it was nick who actually let bobby know what he'd heard the night they were sleeping, and what ennis said he thought it meant.

"oh, that's it?"

"basically," said nick.

bobby wasn't bothered. "well, maybe. i don't remember dreaming about my dad, but ennis is probably right. i mean.. uh, you know how gary's always saying how children are like arrows, and parents are the bow that points them where they think they ought to land?"

there was a pause after the two men nodded, and during that time bobby was biting his lip. "welllll, my dad didn't to that to me. he grabbed me like a knife, and stabbed me into the dirt. he didn't let go of me until the ground was wet from me crying, you know what i mean? it was only until the earth was so muddy that i was able to escape and let ennis find me. but after i found out my dad died... well, it's really been bothering me."

bobby went on to say that he knew his dad loved him, and that he loved him too despite the abuse. "all i can think of now is how he felt when he finally realized i was missing. i ran away before but always came back, but... i know when he knew he lost me he freaked. like, majorly."

nicky nodded and flexed his pecs, itching to get back out in the wilderness. ennis shrugged and said that's how he felt it probably went. they weren't much help to bobby, who was just glad to have been able to tell them this. he sensed that his story was getting to them, so he let go of their hands finally.

"so don't worry about a thing, nicky, i don't wanna steal jack from ennis." bobby turned to look at ennis. "i doubt anyone can do that... and i don't wanna kill you, ever. capeeeeesh?"

bobby said what nick sometimes did, imitating the gangsters in movies. he held out his hands and grabbed their necks, and tried to pull their heads toward him.

"all right, all right. i'm sorry," nick said, "i just freaked out when you said it. your eyes were wide open and i thought you were awake. one day, i'm gonna record what you say, just so you can hear it."

"you should," said bobby with confidence, "that would be neat. okay, run along, do your bong hit."

when nick left them alone again, ennis called bobby a smart-ass, to which the raccoon defended himself by pointing at his teacher's head. "it's your fault. wait, no, not really. i dunno. my dad... shit. he made me what i am, didn't he?"

"he did shape you, yes... i think."

"well, at least i know how to play cards real good. and cook a little bit. my mom, she shaped me too, that's where i get my crafty talent. she, um, used to knit, and she taught me how to tie nets. get me a ball of string, and i'll make you a tank top like yog was wearing. you want one like it?"

ennis said he wouldn't be caught dead wearing purple netting, but still wondered how long it would take him.

"dunno, probably a couple of hours."

"that's IT?"

"yeah, it goes fast.... why are you hemming and hawing?"

"huh?"

"i see you thinkin, ennis. just say it."

ennis smiled, his brown eyes pulled fast into bobby's bright blue orbits. "well, maybe you could make one for jack. a tank top, i mean..."

"AND?"

ennis's eyebrows danced a bit, they looked at bobby once more, then stared at the ceiling. he didn't look down until he got poked in the chest.

"i know what you want, and i'll do it. you're so predictable, ennis, that's what i love about you. it's like you're me when i was older, if that makes sense."

bobby described the string he'd need, a cotton two-ply of medium weight. a natural color, he thought, would look best against their bodies. "you make sure it's 100% cotton! anything else and the knots will slip!" he was already walking backwards away from the dinette. he didn't want to go into town, he wanted to get back to his tent. he said only came back to the RV that morning for empty bottles and water purification tablets.

ennis said, "fine," and that after they got back, he'd bring by food.

"don't bother," bobby said, "i'm roughing it. i wanna try and see how long i can last by relying on what nature gives me."

"you gotta eat," said ennis reproachfully, eying the skinny torso above the blue jeans. "come here."

bobby groaned and said he was stuffed. he showed ennis where his pocket was bulging. "pinecone seeds. that's why my fingers are black, from the pitch, and then the ash from fire from toasting them." he reached in and scattered a bunch on the table so a starry constellation formed on the dark brown wood-grained formica top.

ennis picked up a seed to taste, then grabbed a handful to eat.

.