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God, I wish life didn't have to be so fucking complicated.
Mimi wants kids. I can tell. And I feel like shit because I keep saying "no". But I can't handle it. I just... I can't.
Some mansion-thing happened a few days ago. Mark and I switched personalities. It was... fucking weird. But... I held Gracie. I've never held her before, no matter how many times Mark's asked if I wanted to. Played with her, a little, but never... and it felt so good and she was calling me Daddy instead of Mark (which was weird, but... she's the smartest one out of all of us, I think - she figured it out first), and afterwards I couldn't get the image out of my head of... of me holding a different baby, and having him call me Daddy.
But I can't. Because Fiyero's his Dad. I might be the father, but...
God, April, I'm sorry. I miss you. I love you, no matter how much I love Mimi, I think I'll always love you more and that fucking hurts.
I just wish I knew what to do.
Mimi wants kids. I can tell. And I feel like shit because I keep saying "no". But I can't handle it. I just... I can't.
Some mansion-thing happened a few days ago. Mark and I switched personalities. It was... fucking weird. But... I held Gracie. I've never held her before, no matter how many times Mark's asked if I wanted to. Played with her, a little, but never... and it felt so good and she was calling me Daddy instead of Mark (which was weird, but... she's the smartest one out of all of us, I think - she figured it out first), and afterwards I couldn't get the image out of my head of... of me holding a different baby, and having him call me Daddy.
But I can't. Because Fiyero's his Dad. I might be the father, but...
God, April, I'm sorry. I miss you. I love you, no matter how much I love Mimi, I think I'll always love you more and that fucking hurts.
I just wish I knew what to do.