A large heart has stopped
I knelt down before the casket and looked at the man I knew so well, and said to him “you don’t mind if I don’t cross myself, do you?” because he would have loved to hear that when he was alive, which brought tears for the first time that evening. “You’ve always been kind to me” I told him, my voice eroding “I will miss you”.
And I will. Nikki’s dad, who treated me like a son, dead at 59.
Looking at him he seemed like he was still breathing, and I almost expected to hear his booming voice - but the formerly powerful, round body was shrunken within the now ill-fitting suit, his face artificially calm. The man who seemed to fill a room is hardly filling the casket, and there is no yield in his once perpetually-warm hand.
I can’t decide how I feel about the Christian way of filling a dead body with fluids to be put on display.
Because his body was no longer contained his large soul, his eyes didn’t sparkle, his face didn’t wear the sardonic grin I knew so well.
But I got to say my goodbye, his way. Did he hear me? Would he have heard me anyway?
His cat died the day he went into a coma; she knew.
He was her world, and she wasted away without him. Will she greet him on the other side, and lick his face again, paw on each shoulder, as always?
I must go to the funeral now...
And I will. Nikki’s dad, who treated me like a son, dead at 59.
Looking at him he seemed like he was still breathing, and I almost expected to hear his booming voice - but the formerly powerful, round body was shrunken within the now ill-fitting suit, his face artificially calm. The man who seemed to fill a room is hardly filling the casket, and there is no yield in his once perpetually-warm hand.
I can’t decide how I feel about the Christian way of filling a dead body with fluids to be put on display.
Because his body was no longer contained his large soul, his eyes didn’t sparkle, his face didn’t wear the sardonic grin I knew so well.
But I got to say my goodbye, his way. Did he hear me? Would he have heard me anyway?
His cat died the day he went into a coma; she knew.
He was her world, and she wasted away without him. Will she greet him on the other side, and lick his face again, paw on each shoulder, as always?
I must go to the funeral now...