Give Me Love: Part 4/6
Title: Give Me Love
Author: glitterbomb15
Rating: T/PG-13
Warnings (if any): Some descriptions of blood/injury
Total Word Count: 19,159
Summary: Kurt Hummel is stuck in the monotony of his life, completely alone and unsatisfied. Until he wakes up one morning to find that he’s grown a pair of wings and been gifted a bow. Destined to give love to other people, Kurt finds himself at a loss, never having experienced love himself. Until he meets Blaine, a paramedic who saves him in more ways than one. Based on the music video for the song "Give Me Love" by Ed Sheeran.
Masterpost
Fic Art
After their talk, Kurt asked Santana if she still had her textbook. When she confirmed that she did, he sent her to go get it so they could look over the parts about Cupid and figure out what he was supposed to do next. She returned and they looked at the few pages about him, but Kurt already knew what he was supposed to do the second Santana had said “Cupid.”
He had to give love to people. That was his calling, his purpose. The wood carving tools were given to him to make his arrows and choose his victims-so to speak.
Still, he had to wonder why. Why was he given that power? He, who had never even been close to falling in love? It made no sense. Until he thought of his mother, that is. He knew it was farfetched, but the textbook said that Cupid was the son of Venus. Kurt had never met his mother, his father refused to speak about her, there were no pictures of her… It was improbable, but so was the pair of wings that had grown from his back.
Santana stayed for a couple more hours, pretending to humor Kurt’s idea that he was Cupid, before she had to return to On The Rocks and start her shift. Once he was alone, he decided to test out the wood carving tools. Kurt grabbed a rotted wooden plank that had popped out of his floor in the kitchen and studied it, rolling it around in his hands. If the wood was rotted, was it still usable? He picked up one of the tools and experimentally dug at one of the four edges of the wood. It rolled off easily, falling to the floor. He repeated the motion, amazed at how easy this was for him. Again and again, he dug and carved and scraped at the wood, leaving a big block at the top to make the arrowhead.
Kurt hadn’t even realized he’d zoned out until a knock at the door startled him. The tool fell from his right hand, and in his left, was a perfectly carved arrow.
“Kurt? I think I remembered the right place. It’s kind of unforgettable in its…character. Are you home?”
Kurt frowned and made his way over to the door. He opened it a sliver like he did for Santana and peered out. “Blaine? What are you doing here?”
“I just wanted to make sure you were okay after last night.”
“I’m fine. Thank you for bringing me home.”
“You’re welcome.”
They stood in awkward silence, Blaine looking at the ground and Kurt looking at Blaine. Finally, Blaine cleared his throat and said, “Uh, could I come in?”
Kurt hesitated. What if Blaine saw his wings? But if Santana couldn’t, surely Blaine couldn’t either. Maybe humans couldn’t see them. Kurt slowly pulled the door open, stepping aside to allow Blaine in. When Blaine didn’t gasp or jump back, Kurt knew he was safe.
Blaine stepped over to Kurt’s desk and picked up the arrow, eyeing the tools among the desk and the curls and chips of wood on the floor. “Did you carve this?”
“Yeah, I um… It’s a new hobby of mine. Wood carving.”
“Why?”
Kurt shrugged. “Why not?”
“Touché,” Blaine said, half-smirking.
They fell into silence again, Blaine glancing around Kurt’s apartment and Kurt still wondering in amazement how he could stand there with a pair of wings on his back and act completely normal.
They both tried to break the silence at the same time.
“So what was it that you-”
“I just wanted to come by and say-”
They laughed awkwardly. Kurt wanted nothing more than to escape the awkwardness of the moment and go back to when he and Blaine had a semi-normal, almost-friendship.
“You go first,” Blaine said.
“No, that’s okay, you go ahead.”
“Well, I just wanted to come by and say I’m sorry for last night. I was kind of rude to you and you didn’t really do anything wrong.”
“Thanks, but I’m sorry too. I totally lost track of time, I didn’t mean to stand you up and then walk in an hour and a half late.”
Blaine cocked his head to the side. “Was it a date?”
Kurt could feel his heart stutter in his chest. “Was it?”
They stared at each other before Blaine chuckled and looked away. “Um, not really, I guess? I mean we never stated…”
“You said see you Tuesday, so I guess I just kind of thought…”
“Right, that would make sense…”
“But maybe we should have clarified…”
“Yeah…” Blaine paused, then smiled and met Kurt’s gaze again. “Why is this so awkward?”
Kurt laughed, and the heavy feeling he’d had in his chest since Blaine knocked on the door lightened. “I don’t know.”
“How about this,” Blaine started, walking closer to Kurt and taking one of his hands. Blaine laced their fingers together and said, “Kurt, would you like to go to dinner with me?”
“Now?”
“Why not?”
Again, Kurt hesitated. It was obvious from his interactions with Santana and Blaine that he was the only one who could see his wings, but going out onto the streets of New York City was a completely different story. Then again, he was going to have to sometime, wasn’t he? He wasn’t going to give love to people from his apartment. He’d have to go out, observe people, shoot arrows at the couples he saw fit.
And maybe going out with Blaine could lead to something good, something more.
“Sure,” Kurt smiled. “I’d like that.”
They stood smiling at each other for a moment longer before Blaine turned and headed for the door, never letting go of Kurt’s hand.
The awkwardness they’d been feeling in Kurt’s apartment quickly faded away as they walked down the street. Kurt had no idea where they were going; he allowed himself to be steered wherever Blaine saw fit for them to go. He glanced around at everyone who walked by, wondering when one of them would stop and stare at him, but it never happened. His wings were folded closely to his back behind them, and it felt like they weren’t even there.
Eventually they came upon a small Italian café. Blaine opened the door for Kurt and then followed him in.
“I hope you like Italian food,” Blaine said as they stood waiting to be seated. “If not, we can go somewhere else.”
“No, this is great,” Kurt replied. Internally he was rejoicing at finally having better Italian food than Breadstix.
When they were seated and given the menus, Kurt couldn’t help but gawk at the prices.
“Blaine, this place is kind of expensive.”
Blaine smiled and reached across the table to take Kurt’s hand. “Don’t worry about it.”
“Are you sure?”
“Absolutely. This is one of my favourite restaurants in the city. It’s as much a treat for me as it is for you.”
Kurt blushed and glanced back down at the menu. The waiter came to take their drink orders, asking if they’d like to take a look at the wine menu. Blaine dismissed it immediately and ordered a glass of water, so Kurt followed suit. Their waiter soon returned with a pitcher and filled their glasses, then took their food order.
“So how did you decide to be a paramedic?” Kurt asked after the waiter left.
Blaine frowned and looked down at the table. “Uh…”
“I’m sorry,” Kurt rushed to say. “I was trying to start with an easy question. I didn’t mean to go into something deeper.”
“No, no, it’s okay. That’s just a, uh… It’s a complicated story. It’s actually tied into why I was so rude to you last night.”
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
“I do-want to, I mean-but at the same time…”
“I get it,” Kurt assured him. “We don’t have to talk about it. New topic.”
Blaine caught Kurt’s eye and made a grateful smile, then asked, “So, how did you get into wood carving?”
Kurt’s wings fluttered a little as he shifted in his seat. How does one explain a sudden interest in wood carving? Of course, Blaine hardly knew him. It didn’t have to be sudden to Blaine. It could be normal. It could be something Kurt’s been interested in his whole life. Kurt didn’t really want to lie about it, though.
“That is also a complicated story,” he finally answered.
Blaine laughed a little. “Okay. Why don’t you just tell me something about yourself? You pick.”
“I wouldn’t even know what to say. I’m not a very interesting person.” I just have wings and I think I’m Cupid and I’m supposed to go around shooting people with arrows of desire.
“I’m sure that’s not true. You’re a great artist.”
Kurt made a face and shook his head. “Oh, gosh. Those drawings you saw at Central Park were not my best work at all. That’s hardly anything to judge my abilities off of.”
“If that’s your version of bad I’d love to see something you’ve drawn that you’re proud of.”
“Maybe I’ll show you one or two. Maybe.”
“I’ll take a maybe.”
They smiled and gazed at each other for a minute before Kurt said, “Okay, now tell me something about you.”
“Now that’s not fair! You didn’t tell me anything!”
“So?”
Blaine shook his head and laughed. “Fine. I’m not actually from here.”
Kurt rolled his eyes. “Well, that’s not surprising. Less than half of the city is actually from here. The majority of the population is a bunch of wide-eyed people from out of state who moved to the Big Apple in hopes of becoming stars.”
“Is that what brought you here?”
“A long time ago, yes. Those dreams have long since faded. What brought you here?”
Blaine’s face fell; Kurt took the hint.
“Bad territory again?”
“Kind of.”
“Well, where are you from?”
“Ohio.”
“Really? Me too.”
Blaine smiled a little again. “What city?”
“Lima.”
Blaine squeezed his hand. “I’m from Westerville.”
Kurt’s heart skipped a beat. “We lived like two hours away from each other.”
“I know,” Blaine laughed. “Our paths could have crossed.”
“They probably did.”
The waiter came by and with their two plates of food, so Kurt reluctantly let go of Blaine’s hand. They thanked the waiter and Blaine immediately speared a piece of ravioli with his fork, shoving it in his mouth. Kurt probably would have rebuked his table manners had it not been so amusing.
“You’re going to burn your mouth,” Kurt laughed.
Blaine closed his eyes and moaned, and Kurt tried very hard not to react to that whatsoever. “Oh, but Kurt, it’s so good.”
“I hope you’re enjoying that one bite because it probably burned off all your taste buds and you won’t be able to taste the rest of it.”
“Worth it.”
Kurt laughed again and cut off a smaller piece of his manicotti, blowing on it carefully before eating it. “Oh, wow. This is good.”
“I told you.”
Conversation slowed a bit as they ate, but Kurt couldn’t get Westerville out of his mind. He knew he recognized the town name from somewhere; he just couldn’t put his finger on it. A few minutes later, it dawned on him. Glee club. The Dalton Academy Warblers were from Westerville. He didn’t remember Blaine being in the club, but there was a chance.
“Westerville, right? Did you go to Dalton Academy, by any chance?”
Blaine paused. “Yes, actually. Why?”
“Were you in the Warblers?”
“Uh, I wanted to be, but my dad wouldn’t let me.”
“Why not?” When Blaine didn’t answer, Kurt added, “Another complicated story?”
“Something like that.”
“Consider it forgotten.” Kurt offered Blaine a small smile, and when Blaine looked up and returned it, they both went back to their meals.
They continued to chat about surface things, finding a lot of common ground and sharing interests. Still, Kurt was curious. Blaine seemed to have a lot of things that were “complicated stories” and Kurt really wanted to know what they were. Of course Blaine wouldn’t tell him yet, this was only their first date and they didn’t know each other that well, but that didn’t stop Kurt from wondering.
The mystery of Blaine’s past was on Kurt’s mind for the rest of the date, but when Blaine laced their fingers together on the walk home, those thoughts evaporated to give way to thoughts of how nice it felt to walk down the streets holding hands with a guy Kurt liked.
Blaine walked him up to his front door then paused. “Thank you for coming to dinner with me.”
“Thank you for asking. I had a great time,” Kurt said.
“I’m glad. Would you like to go out again sometime soon?”
Kurt smiled and squeezed Blaine’s hand. “I’d like that very much.”
“Good,” Blaine smiled.
Kurt knew what came next. The kiss goodnight. Kurt had kissed plenty of guys, simple little kisses at the end of dates before he never saw those guys again. He knew that wouldn’t happen with Blaine-they’d just confirmed a second date, after all-but what if the chemistry wasn’t right? Then this whole date would be for nothing and their second date would either be cancelled or awful. Lack of kissing chemistry was one of the major reasons Kurt hadn’t had more than one date with the same guy.
Oh, but then Blaine was leaning in, and he smelled like cinnamon and raspberries, and their faces were mere inches from each other, then centimeters, and Blaine’s hand was on Kurt’s cheek, and their foreheads were touching, and he could feel Blaine’s breath ghosting over his lips.
“This is okay, right?” Blaine murmured.
Kurt melted a little, sighing against Blaine’s lips, “God, yes,” before closing the distance.
Any worry that Kurt had about their kissing chemistry was completely dissolved the second his lips touched Blaine’s. The hand Blaine had cupping Kurt’s cheek moved to the back of his neck, pulling Kurt closer to him. Kurt responded immediately, placing one hand on Blaine’s chest and grabbing a fistful of his shirt, then putting the other one on Blaine’s lower back to pull them even closer. Their lips moved together effortlessly, like they’d spent their whole lives kissing each other and becoming attuned to what they both liked. Blaine caught Kurt’s bottom lip between his teeth and bit lightly before tugging away.
It was the single most erotic thing Kurt had ever experienced.
When he opened his eyes, Blaine was staring at him, smiling softly.
“I’ll see you soon,” Blaine said, dropping his hands and stepping out of the embrace.
Kurt immediately missed the warmth. “Yeah. Definitely.”
“Goodnight.”
Kurt watched Blaine walk away. When Blaine was out of sight, Kurt said quietly, “Goodnight.”
He turned around and went inside his apartment, feeling lighter than he had in years. When he spotted the arrow on his desk, and looked at the bow by the door, he smiled and said to himself, “I suddenly feel a lot more qualified to aim well.”
… … …
You know I'll fight my corner
And that tonight I'll call ya
… … …
The streets of New York City at 11 o’clock at night were not known to be the safest. Yet, here Kurt was, on the busy streets of the city that never sleeps with his one perfect arrow and his bow to shoot it.
After such a perfect date, it seemed only right that he would venture out and see if he could find someone to give love to. Maybe he wouldn’t shoot the arrow tonight at all, maybe he’d decide that he didn’t see anybody who looked like they were meant to be together, but he wanted to try.
How was he even supposed to know? The note said to aim well, but it didn’t tell him how. Not only had Kurt never shot a bow and arrow in his life, but how was he supposed to pick his targets? Sure, he had a wonderful date with Blaine-magical, really-but that didn’t make him an expert on love. Who gets to be deemed worthy of love, and how was he supposed to make that choice?
A person came to mind. A person Kurt knew had been in love before and would be able to help him. A person that just so happened to work not far from his apartment.
Santana.
Kurt changed direction and headed for On The Rocks. The smell of beer and body odor hit him the second he entered the bar. It was packed, crowded with rowdy men, and women dressed like prostitutes. Kurt spotted Santana and folded his wings closely behind him before heading towards her, pushing past a sea of sweaty bodies until he found an empty bar stool.
“Santana!” He called out, trying to be heard over the noise of the crowd.
She turned when she heard her name and nodded her acknowledgement before finishing the drinks she was making for a group of women at the end of the bar.
“Hey,” she greeted once she made her way over to him.
“Hey. Busy night.”
“It’s always a busy night. What’s up? You still convinced you’re Cupid?”
“Yep.”
“Want a drink?”
“No, thanks. I actually came for your advice.”
“On what?”
Kurt lifted his bow and arrow that he’d been carrying at his side and set them on the bar. “Aiming well.”
Santana’s eyes widened. “You’re actually going to shoot someone with that? Hummel, you’re going to spear someone’s gut, not make them fall in love! What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“No, I’m not! It’ll be fine. This is what I’m supposed to do. The arrows will dissolve or something.”
“You’re insane.”
“Whatever. Look, I need your help. You loved Brittany, didn’t you?”
Santana tensed immediately, staring at Kurt with hard eyes. “Love. Yes. I love her.”
“How did you know? What was it that told you she was the one for you?”
“She’s obviously not the one for me. We’re not together.”
“San. Come on. Please.”
“I don’t know. It’s complicated.” She sighed and ran her fingers through her hair, preoccupying herself with wiping down the bar in front of him. “It’s hard to explain. I just knew. The first time we slept together, it was an accident. It started as two friends experimenting, just having fun. We were both curious about what it was like to kiss a girl, and we were close enough that we trusted each other with that curiosity. It started as kissing and somehow, it went further. Before I even realized what was happening, our clothes were off, and she was touching me in a way I’d never been touched before. Her skin was soft and she was gentle.
“Afterwards, I remember laying there next to her, my mind reeling because I couldn’t believe I’d just had sex with a girl. It went against everything I’d been taught. But she was so sweet, and her hair looked so beautiful with the blue tint of moonlight, and she looked so content. I ran my fingers down her arm and she immediately curled into me in her sleep. Like it was natural for her to want to be near me even in her subconscious. I remember getting this overwhelming feeling that washed over me from my head to my toes, settling heavy in my chest, that if I could freeze time, it would be right then. I’d have spent my whole life in that moment.”
Kurt sat still, completely stunned by the story. Santana’s eyes had glossed over and she looked far away, the story obviously pulling her into the memory. Then someone to Kurt’s right shouted for another beer and she snapped out of it, realizing where she was. Without a word to Kurt, she went over to the man and handed him another beer. She took care of all the customers at her bar, leaving Kurt to sit and think for a while.
Ten minutes later, she returned to him. She didn’t say anything, just waited for his reply.
Finally, Kurt met her gaze and asked, “If that’s how you feel, why aren’t you two together?”
“I don’t think that she feels the same way. Brittany loves everyone. She’s the kindest soul I’ve ever met. But I don’t know if she knows what it means to really love someone.”
Kurt nodded his head, looking down at the bow and arrow before him. “If you could be with her again, would you?”
Santana paused, considering the question. “I don’t know. It hurts to not be with her, but it hurts more to be with her when I don’t know if she’s really in it, you know?”
“Yeah.”
After a minute, Kurt stood up. “Thank you, Santana.”
“Uh-huh.”
She seemed in a different mood than when she came in. Kurt felt bad for making her so upset. He reached across the bar and grabbed her hand, squeezing it until she looked up at him. “I’m sorry.”
“Me too.”
He offered her a small smile and squeezed her hand once more before releasing it. “I’ll come back and see you soon, okay?”
“Okay.”
Back on the street, Kurt felt much more melancholy than he had when he’d first been out there. After his date with Blaine earlier, he felt much more hopeful about love. He thought maybe it wasn’t as unachievable as he’d thought. After his talk with Santana, though, he wasn’t sure he wanted to fall in love at all. What if he fell in love-maybe even with Blaine-and something happened? One of them fell out of love, or they just grew apart, or they weren’t as compatible as they seemed, or one loved too much while the other didn’t love enough?
There were too many variables. Kurt wasn’t sure he wanted to give love to anyone. It seemed to him like it was much more trouble than it was worth. He wouldn’t wish the pain he saw on Santana’s face when she talked about Brittany on anyone.
Just as he was about to reach home, though, he came across two women walking with their arms linked. One of them wore a white fur coat over jeans and a dressy shirt, the other a dark purple dress. They were stumbling a little, laughing, enjoying each other’s company. They were obviously very close with each other.
They looked happy.
Kurt’s heart stuttered in his chest as he watched them together. The one in dark purple dress had this secret smile; she’d look at the girl in the white fur coat, and then when her friend met her eye, she’d look away.
They reminded him of Santana and Brittany, in a happier day.
That rush Santana mentioned washed through him from his head to his toes. His wings extended of their own volition and before he even knew what he was doing, he lifted the bow and aimed the arrow, then released it.
He watched in wonder as the arrow hit the girl in the fur coat on the back, then poofed into thin air, leaving a pink smoke in its wake. She stopped suddenly under a fire escape and turned to her friend. Kurt watched as she gently pushed her friend against the metal construct, leaned in, and kissed her. The girl in the purple dress wrapped her arms around her friend, kissing her with so much passion that Kurt had to look away. He glanced back at them just in time to see them separate and share a smile-the same kind of smile only one of them wore before.
Kurt knew he’d picked the right person, the right couple. He’d given love to someone and it felt better than anything he’d ever experienced.
As he walked home, he tried to ignore the melancholy thought that was telling him that though they seemed happy now, that could change in a heartbeat. He didn’t want to think about that. Love was supposed to be a good thing. Love was a gift. And Kurt was going to give it to as many people as he could.