Long way from Conway (48 part 1/?)
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A/N: Hey guys! HUGE chapter alert here! Okay, well, here you'll find out what exactly is going on with Adam and well...some kinda scary/shocking news at the end. Now, what Adam has is, I know, a touchy subject and basically, I'm trying my best to make it sound real. It's kinda hard to write about if you don't know quite so much about it or have any experience with it, but as I said, I'm trying my best. Also, I think that this will be one of the last chapters I'll use first person with for a while. It gets kinda' hard to write after a while, I suppose, so....yeah. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy for the most part and don't hate me for the cliff hanger at the end here! Oh, and congrats to my GATORS for having a great basketball season. THIS CLOSE to the Final Four, boys! Will miss you Parsons and Macklin :) Especially you, Parsons, you cutie <3 ANYWAY READ ON :D
"Daddy!"
It takes Adam all but a second to realize that Jessie, his little girl, is in trouble. He turns around in the sandbox to see her being taken away by force by Crystal, her face scaring both the little girl and Adam. He tries to get up, but suddenly, his sand turns to concrete, and he can't move.
"Jessie, I'll help you! Just..."
"DADDY!"
He looks up from the now shackling concrete around him and nearly chokes from lack of air. Crystal has Jessie upside down with a gun to her head and she's laughing about it.
"LET HER GO, CRYSTAL!"
"In your dreams, kid. You're gonna' die after I kill her. Deal with it."
"LET MY LITTLE GIRL GO! SHE'S KRIS'S, NOT MINE!"
Crystal smirks. "But you need to pay. Killing her would be perfect for that now, wouldn't it?"
The gun makes an all too familiar noise, sending a chill up Adam's spine. He tries to scream, but just like that, he can't. He's too shocked. Too scared.
"Better say goodbye to her, Adam..."
"DADDY!"
"Adam...."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Adam!"
"DON'T SHOOT........huh?"
Suddenly, it's not Crystal I see anymore. It's not Jessie, either. It's not that at all. It's my new doctor they assigned to me last night, Dr. Mayar, and man, does he look concerned. I look up at him for a second in a daze and then sigh deeply into my pillow.
"Adam, are you okay?"
"Yeah," I breathe out, "I...I'm good. It...it was just a bad dream. It's nothing."
I see him eye me suspiciously for a moment, and for that exact moment, I feel like my cover is about to be blown. But, like any understanding human, he just nods and turns to his charts. I yawn and take a sip of my water from my tray.
"How you feeling? Sore?"
I shake my head. "Nah, I'm pretty good. My back feels a bit stiff, but I'm not sore."
"Good," he says with a kind smile, "it's great how fast you are recovering. Pretty soon you'll be able to get back to being a normal teen again."
Snorting, I just snuggle up to my pillow and yawn. He doesn't need to know that that is impossible. That I'd never be normal after this. That my troubles already were too damaging to my so called 'normal' life.
"Not to be nosy," he suddenly says, looking through some papers on his clipboard, "but is that dream of yours re-occurring? Like, having to do with the fact you just-"
"Don't," I warn, covering my fears as best as I could. "They aren't, but please, just....don't mention what happened if you don't have to. I have other things I rather think about than the day I almost was wiped off the face of the Earth."
My cover seems to work because Dr. Mayar immediately changes the subject to whether I was hungry or not. I tell him I am, but really, I couldn't be more appalled by food at the moment. It's the last thing on my mind. I feel too sick to my stomach from my dream to even think about eating to tell the truth, but I wouldn't dare give that guy any indication that something was bothering me still. Finally, after a minute or two, he leaves me. I sigh and grab my cell phone off my side-table.
Four texts from Brad. Great.
"Is Kristopher letting you go to the club tonight?"
"You really are good at answering texts, babe."
"I'm gonna' go see you at three today. Lurv you."
"Not answering my lurv you....Kristopher must know of this."
I laugh. Kris must be getting tortured right now. Great.
"ADAM, I'M HOME!!!!!!"
My eyes fly to my door and then go wide as I see Brad stole in wearing an outfit I'm not even sure his own mother would love. I laugh and hug him as he comes close. His brown eyes look so happy.
Reminds me of Kris.....
"Adam, my boy, you wouldn't believe all the plans I have tonight for Cass and I! Oh, life is going great now. I sure hope yours is getting a bit better, is it?"
I bite my lip. Lying to a doctor......I can deal with. Lying to Brad, the closet person next to my family and Kris I have? Much harder.
"Uh...yeah. So," I say, twiddling my thumbs, "what is this 'club' you talked about?"
"Oh, it's so cool. It opened a while ago and.....wait, is Kris not letting you go?"
I shrug. "He didn't even tell me this was going on."
Brad sighs and pats my shoulder. So dramatic. "Oh, my dear, you are so oblivious lately. He's trying to hide it from you. I just knew this would happen. You get one bullet in ya' and then-"
"Brad, please don't speak about that."
"Why not, love?"
"Just........I don't want to dwell on that night."
"You'll have to deal with it sooner or later at the trial-"
"I'm not going."
Brad stomps his foot on the ground and, in astonishment, laughs at me. "You are so whipped, Adam. He's not even letting you go to the trial for the girl who shot you and almost killed your-"
"I SAID NOT TO TALK ABOUT IT!"
"But Adam-"
"GO HOME, BRAD," I yell, and it's almost like how it was in the dream in a way. I can yell, but I'm so angry that I can't move or think straight.
It feels horrible.
"Fine," he spits out, glaring at me with all his might, "if that's what you want."
"Brad-"
"It's what you want," Brad says a little louder as he walks out the door, hurt written on his face. I groan and then fall against my pillow in anger.
Why did I lash out at him like that? Why in the world am I being effected by this like I am?
WHY is Crystal ruining my life like this???????
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Brad's POV~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Is he freakin serious??????????????
Okay, okay, I get it. He's really hurt because of what happened but.....did he have to yell at me like that? I admit that I was a bit pushy, but.....I wasn't that bad...was I?
As I walk down the hall on my way out of the place, i spot a doctor I remember seeing on one of Adam's chart papers in his room. My head tells me to ignore it and walk away, but my gut tells me to go up to the guy.
I go gut wise. It's Adam, for pete sakes. When has anything I ever have done with him originated from my head?
"Um, excuse me," I say with a tap to the man's shoulder. He smiles at me warmly with big, bright white teeth that make me wish I was a few years older because, oh hey, that's something I never realized was hot.
"Yes?" He replies. I blush and then shuffle my feet.
"I was wondering.......my friend is one of your patients, Adam Lambert to be exact, and well.....I'm kinda' worried about him. He just seems a little....."
"Different? Snappy? Sensitive?"
I raise my eyebrows. The guy knows his stuff. Either that or he's a mind reader.
Oh please don't be the latter.
"Yup. How-"
"I've noticed it too. I've worked with many post trauma patients before and got assigned Adam's case because of his incident alone. He had a bad dream that had to do with a shooting and, although I'm not totally sure of it, I think he's been having them a lot more than he says he does. Plus, he's been very precise about no one mentioning anything about the shooting. Don't go out and tell his family or anything, but.....I think Adam may be suffering a mild form of PTSD."
I gasp loudly. "No way! He....he isn't....he doesn't seem-"
"It seems to mostly be showing itself in his dreams, though. Adam seems to be having dreams that either occur at the time of the shooting or have to do with guns and shooting. It's making him a bit frazzled and paranoid, as you can tell."
"I....I don't understand how he.....he's so strong...I..."
"It's odd how randomly it appeared, I know. He's a very strong person, but a man can only go through so much before their bodies show some reaction to it. He should be lucky though that all he's having is a few bad dreams. He could be much worse. Now....I suggest you go home and let Adam rest a bit without visitors. He needs sleep, and the less conflicted with emotions and free of torment because of his reactions he is, the better."
I gulp. Perhaps I shouldn't have been so snappy with him before.....
"Okay. Um...thank you."
The doctor smiles and then hurries off towards another room, busily off to try to save another life or something. I slowly walk out of the hospital and then, when I do get into my car, I just sit and stare out into the parking lot and think.
Adam may have PTSD.
Gosh.
What kinda' dreams is he having? The fact that he's thinking about such a horrible thing hurts more than anything, and frankly, I can't help but get teary eyed at the fact that he's going through all of this because of an annoying jealous cheerleader gone freak show.
It makes me sick.
Turning the key to start up my car, I take a deep sigh and make a decision right then and there. One that could either be really good or really bad.
I decide to tell Kris about Adam's possible PTSD.
Hopefully, I won't make things worse.
I hope.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Kris's POV~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You have fifteen minutes with her."
"That's good enough for me."
"I'll come for you. Just holler if you need us. Crystal's not gonna' do anything now that she's a fat cow."
"Um...thank you."
I stand in front of the only window I've seen for the past mile of hallway and stare as I see the near murderer of my love lay on a plastic covered mattress speaking to herself as if nothing is wrong.
I feel like hitting her. Real hard, too.
My hand rests on the door handle and then turns it, catching the attention of Crystal instantly. She grins wickedly and then sits up with a huge smile on her face.
"I knew you'd come back! You can't stay mad at me, now can you Kr-"
"Shut the hell up and listen to me, Crystal," I yell and it's almost hilarious as to how shocked her face now looks because of my words. Those words that she should already know the meaning of.
I could laugh so hard if I had the chance.
"I don't understand you one bit. Your so twisted and horrible and......I can't see that blond cheerleader I first met at all. Heck....you've escalated into such a horrible creature that I can barely even see the girl that...that raped me!"
"We just had sex, baby," she coos quietly, nearly making me lose grip on my control, "and look, it resulted into something beautiful. Our baby girl."
"She's my little girl, you wretched person. Don't you ever say she's even related to you. Ever."
Crystal shrugs and then lays back down on her bed. If only the springs gave out......
"Genetically she's mine. Now, come here so I can get a kiss. We haven't done that in so long-"
"I'm so sending your butt to jail for life," I growl, taking a step towards her. "I don't even care what happens to you there."
"You wouldn't care if our little girl loses her mommy?"
"YOU ARE NOT HER MOTHER," I yell furiously, making echoes in the large room, "AND YOU NEVER WILL BE YOU MONSTER!"
"Harsh today, are we Krissy?"
"Don't call me that," I warn, only causing her to laugh. "You will never see the light of day again if that judge has any sense in his head. Just warning you to live up the last few moments of being somewhat free."
Crystal smirks and then gets up from the bed. Absentmindedly, I take a step back, but she keeps coming closer, and all my brain can think of is what to do after she inevitably kisses me. I cringe a bit as my back hits the wall, knowing that now she has me cornered, and I try to brace myself for the unpleasantness about to come. She's an inch in front of my face when suddenly, the door flies open and hits the wall with a loud bang, causing both of us to look up.
I kinda' like Brad now.
"Get the hell off Adam's boy unless you wanna' feel the wrath of his very pissed best friend, lady."
Crystal in front of me laughs and, ew, her breath stinks like crap.
Once again, I kinda like Brad now.
"Why the heck would I do that? I was sooo close to kissing him-"
"I said for you to get off," Brad says louder, "and if you don't, I can force you off."
Crystal rolls her eyes and only gets closer. If only she wasn't carrying my child...
"I'd love to see you, Mr. Scrawny, try to get me off of Krissy."
"Well, then enjoy the view."
Before I can warn Brad to be careful, he immediately rips Crystal off of me and flings her on to her bed, about three feet from where I'm standing, making her hit the wall to the side of it hard on her side . He's about to hit her bed to shake her up even more when I finally manage to get up enough strength to talk.
"Brad," I yell, "stop it!"
Brad turns to look back at me for a moment, and when I see his eyes, I see something odd about them. He didn't look himself. He looked so.....violent. Hurt beyond belief.
I can't help but worry about that for a moment.
Why just a moment?
Because after a moment, I start to hear Crystal moan in pain, and my only coherent thought regarding that is oh dear God no, the baby.
"Why are you moaning?" I ask a bit harshly to not let her think I'm going all soft on her. She moans again, this time placing a hand on her stomach. My eyes widen in fear.
"D-did I hurt the baby?"
I switch my gaze over to Brad, and now, he looks so guilty and worried that it's almost troubling. Once again, he looks alien to me, but beneath all his alien-ness, I can see him really start to freak out like the real Brad I know. I quickly run over to Crystal and examine her expression.
She really looked hurt. Like, hurt hurt.
"Brad, stay here and watch her. Text me if anything happens, okay?"
He numbly nods before I make my way out of the room and down the hall. After a minute, I reach her guard's room, and the moment he sees me, he's out of his chair and running to the door.
I must look panicked on the outside also, I guess.
Together, without words, we run back to the room, and when we get there, Brad is huddled in the corner having a mini freak attack while Crystal is moaning pretty loud in the same position on the bed. The guard goes over to Crystal and leaves me at the doorway. I watch nervously as he assesses her condition next to her bed and then radios some intelligible code words into his walkie-talkie.
"I didn't mean to hurt the baby," Brad whimpers out from the corner. I quickly walk over to him and wrap my arms around him. He looks so scared.
"We...we don't know if you did, Brad. Just.....calm down. Um...sir?"
The guard turns and looks at me attentively. I swallow hard.
"Can you call me if it's anything....bad?"
He nods and motions me to go and leave, probably sensing that Brad's going to go all crazy in a few seconds. Yanking his shaking arm, we both exit fast and run down the hall. Finally, when we get to the lobby, I see a closed off waiting room that is empty. I run up to the nurse and motion towards it. She nods after seeing Brad and quickly goes to open it. I just give her a nod once she lets us in and then shut the door behind me. Brad slowly goes over to a chair and sits down in it, his hand trembling slightly.
I can almost feel how worried he is.
"I didn't want to make it worse," he randomly says to me while I lock the door, "I just wanted her to pay as much as Adam is and-"
"Hold the phone. Why did you say Adam is paying? Is he okay?"
Brad shakes his head. "He may have a form of PTSD, Kris. His new doctor said that he's having dreams that have to do with the shooting and he's being really sensitive about the shooting and-"
"He had a bad dream when I last saw him," I murmur quietly, cutting Brad off. "He just shrugged it off and changed the subject but I never knew......are they sure of this?"
"They aren't 100% sure, but this doctor......Kris, he's worked with post trauma patients before. H-he knows his stuff."
I shake my head as the realization hits me. Crystal got to Adam again, and once again, I could do nothing to help him with it. Furiously, I kick one of the chairs in the room, sending it tumbling into the wall. Brad flinches as it hits it and then looks back up at me with caution.
"WHY DOES SHE HAVE TO KEEP RUINING MY LIFE, BRAD?" Brad shies away from me a bit, almost letting me have my moment of anger away from him.
"I'm sorry," he whispers, "I'm so sorry."
"WHY DOES SHE HAVE TO RUIN EVERY GOOD THING THAT COMES MY WAY? IS SHE GOING TO HURT MY BABY GIRL, NOW? IS HER DUMB BODY TOO WEAK TO PROTECT MY BABY GIRL?"
"She didn't hurt the baby, Kris....I did."
"You were trying to give revenge she oh-so-deserved, Brad," I growl, "so never say this was your fault."
"But Kris-"
"THIS ISN'T YOUR FAULT, BRAD!"
Brad gulps and wipes his face from tears. "Yes it is. She was fine until I threw her against the wall......I'm so sorry."
"Don't say you are-"
"Well I am anyway, Kris! I may have just harmed the one thing that hasn't been tainted by that....thing it's in! I can't not say sorry to you! What else can I say? I'm only seventeen, Kris! It's not like I can get a freakin wand and make everything better! I HAVE to say sorry!"
"Well-"
"Um, boys?"
Brad and I both turn to the door to see the guard standing there. He looks serious.
Dead serious.
"I, uh, have some kind of....troubling news about Crystal."
I gulp loudly. "Is my baby okay?"
"Well....kinda'. Um....as scary as it sounds......Crystal's water broke."
"Okay, hold up. She's only six months."
"Actually seven," the guard grumbles. "The doctor who told you that was wrong. She is seven months, and this baby is coming. Today."
"D-did I cause this? By....well...throwing her, I guess?"
The guard shrugged. "Something caused the sac around the baby to rupture too soon. Since she wasn't too active, the only other way is-"
"No," Brad said sternly, "no, no, no, no, no! I...I didn't mean for the baby to come this soon! Kris, I...........no!"
"Will she survive?" I choke out in shock. How is this happening?
"Possibly, yes," the guard replies, "but........there are no guarantees. Babies born at twenty eight weeks aren't exactly guaranteed to survive. I'm afraid she may not make it."
"Kris," Brad cries, "I'm so sorry...I didn't mean to. I'm so so so so sorry, Kris."
Helplessly, I just stare at the guard as my shock overwhelms me. For pete sakes, this was not supposed to happen. It just wasn't.
What is Adam going to say? He's already got enough on his plate. He doesn't need to know that his little girl is on the verge of possibly dying. He doesn't need to know that Brad caused part of this to happen. He doesn't need to know that he's going to be a father now.
He doesn't need any of this.
"W-where is my little girl?"
"On her way to the hospital. We....we don't have good enough medical technology here to keep her here."
"I want to be taken to her. Now."
"Of course."
"Kris," I hear Brad call, "please at least say something to me!"
"Go home, Brad," I tell him coldly. "I don't want you near my little girl."
Brad's jaw drops slightly and, deep down, I feel a slight pang of guilt. He didn't mean to have this happen but....I can't take any more chances. I just can't.
"But....Kris......Adam would want-"
"But I don't, Brad. Now go home."
Suddenly, i feel the guard escort me out of the room, and before I can realize it, I'm no longer near Brad and I'm in a car speeding off to my little girl at the same hospital Adam's in. It feels too unreal.
It shouldn't be happening.
But....it is.
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To be continued........