(no subject)
i've gotten a plethora of advice on how to get over heartbreak.
most common: to get over someone, get under someone.
an orgasm and a cigarette....works every time.
i tried. it was great. and then it was over. in all, it was just sex. and in the end, all i felt was empty.
to him:
i lay there beside you tonight, watching the moonlight (or maybe it was the streetlight) streaming through the half-parted curtains of your bedroom window. i watched the beams dance in...casting an ethereal glow on the skin, stretched taut across your back. the day old growth slightly darkening your jaw. you seemed content. oblivious to the emotions warring within me.
you reached for me once, in your sleep. i moved..purposefully...away from you and your arm landed gently on the sheets (still warm from my presence). i lay there wondering if you even realized....anything.
instead of touching you, or letting you hold me, i lay there. inches away from you and stared at the hand you held out. short nails, rough palms, the light sprinkling of hair across your knuckles --beautiful...but not enough. not her.
and then, i couldn't take it anymore. so gingerly, i crawled from your bed. careful not to wake you. (i didn't want to have that conversation). quickly gathering my clothes...what i could find of them (keep the bra, i have more). and i left, like a thief stealing out in the night.
the cool night air met me, only the darkness to see my tears. and i cried.
he could never do for me what you did....you made my heart sing.
most common: to get over someone, get under someone.
an orgasm and a cigarette....works every time.
i tried. it was great. and then it was over. in all, it was just sex. and in the end, all i felt was empty.
to him:
i lay there beside you tonight, watching the moonlight (or maybe it was the streetlight) streaming through the half-parted curtains of your bedroom window. i watched the beams dance in...casting an ethereal glow on the skin, stretched taut across your back. the day old growth slightly darkening your jaw. you seemed content. oblivious to the emotions warring within me.
you reached for me once, in your sleep. i moved..purposefully...away from you and your arm landed gently on the sheets (still warm from my presence). i lay there wondering if you even realized....anything.
instead of touching you, or letting you hold me, i lay there. inches away from you and stared at the hand you held out. short nails, rough palms, the light sprinkling of hair across your knuckles --beautiful...but not enough. not her.
and then, i couldn't take it anymore. so gingerly, i crawled from your bed. careful not to wake you. (i didn't want to have that conversation). quickly gathering my clothes...what i could find of them (keep the bra, i have more). and i left, like a thief stealing out in the night.
the cool night air met me, only the darkness to see my tears. and i cried.
he could never do for me what you did....you made my heart sing.