one little word 2013 : [en]joy : goals
GOALS AND IDEAS (life, in general…):
By now you probably know that I *quite* like making goals/plans. For some reason it really helps me focus in on things. It also makes me feel less anxious and aimless, which is always a good thing.
Anyway:
- Continue writing regularly. I love writing for Bliss Habits and for Sprout Dispatch and here @ Gingerblue. I also love writing reviews- I’d love to get my review ranking below 50. I’d also love the opportunity to review more art/creativity books and products, as well, so that’s something I might need to start doing more of (“act as if…” etc.)
- Read for enjoyment on a daily basis- one book a week would be great. I also want to read more poetry and share what I’m reading online. I LOVE poetry, have poetry books and a list of books I want to read. It’s something I love and that really moves me, and it’s something I need to make time for. Also, I very much want to read more books about meditation, spirituality, prayer, etc.
- Meditate every day (or as much as possible). On the first day of December I sat back down and started meditating again. I don’t know why it took so long for me to get back to it, but the benefits were pretty instant. Even if it’s just for five minutes, it makes a huge difference in my attitude and focus and well-being. I’m also exploring different styles of meditations (visualization, breathing exercises, affirmations, etc.) and letting myself be very informal about it. If I feel the extreme need to stop meditating and get up, I allow myself to do that. For some reason, this flexibility has been key to coming back and doing it every day. And it’s making meditation and stillness and prayer something I actually look forward to.
- Get enough sleep and wake up early. One thing I did in 2012 was adjust my schedule and start waking up MUCH earlier. It really changed how I work and function. I love getting up early- I really enjoy that quiet, still time in the morning. I’d like to continue to progress- ideally, I’d like to be up even earlier, have enough time for a relaxed cup of tea and some writing/paperwork stuff, and then in the pool by mid-morning. It will give me more time in the afternoons, which would be a benefit. This must mean getting to bed earlier.
- Continue to work on communication. I miss connecting with my friends, but one weird benefit from the whole struggle I had writing Christmas Cards was that I realized that I just can’t seem to write brief emails/letters. I just *can’t* do it. And I struggle to find focus and time for longer communications. So I have to remind myself of this and find some middle ground.
- I’d love to make a local friend/art buddy. We’ve met so many awesome people over the years but it seems as if our schedules never match up to theirs. Because of my health and Tom’s work, we hesitate to make plans days in advance because we just don’t know what each day will bring. Some days Tom gets slammed with work or I’m too tired/achey to go out. And while I understand other families need to schedule, I believe there’s got to be a local family (or couple) like us- pretty laid back, doesn’t need to make plans weeks in advance, flexible, doesn’t like to fuss too much over what we do when we all hang out. Someone who would be comfortable dropping in, just hanging out and watching movies, someone I could do artsy stuff with, someone I feel *comfortable* with and don’t feel nervous around. Someone I could call up at 4pm and say “hey, you wanna get the kids and the husband and go hang out?” and know that they might possibly be open to that. Someone who would realize how shy I am and how that sometimes makes me hesitant to “get out there” too much. I know this is a pretty tall order, but you know what they say about putting stuff out into the Universe…
- I miss volunteering at the cat shelter every week. A few years ago Delilah (who is 15) started picking up every little thing going around the cat shelter, even though I came home from the shelter, stripped in the garage, and ran right into a hot shower and scrubbed down. Now that Tom is also scrubbing down right after the shelter, I think I might give it another try (carefully). I really miss the time I spent there- it was VERY meaningful to me and I miss it. Before Gracie arrived, I was at the shelter several days a week.
- Join a creative collaboration. I’d love to have some sort of project to work on every week along with others (online or in life), maybe with a common theme or medium.
- I want to start writing fiction again. When Gracie first came home, I couldn’t really do much in the studio since she required a lot of hands-on, but I was desperate for a creative outlet, so I started writing this hugely long, epically dramatic story that I posted anonymously on a forum for writers. As Gracie grew and I was able to return to art, I started to write less and less. I want to continue that story- and write it regularly. I miss it. I miss the way I felt when I sat down to write, the interaction with other writers and the kind people who actually *liked* the story and read it every day.
- Stop being so hard on myself. Figure out what it is I enjoy doing, TRULY and deeply- what brings me joy, what brings me peace, what calms me down, what gets me happy and excited - and do more of those things without so much guilt.
- And, of course, I have garden goals…
I know it seems like a lot… but it’s sort of a GOOD thing for me. I like having these things spelled out. It helps me figure out what I *do* enjoy and what fulfills me. When I write something like this, it’s easier for me focus on the things that I know bring me enjoyment rather than sort of aimlessly surfing the web, organizing my studio for the 400th time, or wandering around the garden in a daze. It’s like I have a little guidebook for well-being.