on gentleness
There are a million and a half things that spark my interest when I first meet someone. Is she funny? Does he approach the world with joy? Does this family actually like one another? Etc. But really, the number one attention-grabber-- the thing that really makes my blood sear through my veins and rise to the surface of my cheeks-- is this person
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I wholeheartedly, from the bottom of my mushy gushy heart, agree that gentleness is beyond fabulous.
However, I'd also like to speak up on the behalf of laughing too loudly. Because the universe needs that, too, and although I think I- like you- have a special room in my heart for the gentle, there's also space reserved especially for those that are just a little bit "larger than life." Hoffman just sent me some Sark, and one particular page jumps out to me so I hereby gift it to you in it's entirety. (words only, sadly I cannot type in the fun and pretty little drawings)
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"ALL my life, I've heard that I'm 'too MUCH.' Too wild, too LOUD, too outrageous, too EMOTIONAL, too sensitive, TOO NEEDY,
TOO MUCH.
My Boyfriend and I have both been called 'larger than life.' When I met him, I asked hijm if he felt 'larger than life.' He put his hands on my shoulders and looked into my eyes:
'Susan, this is the size life IS. anyone who tries to make you smaller is just a Lilliputian.'
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... As I age, I see the temptation to laugh a bit less loudly, ask less, 'tone down' for the benefit of 'others.' Often I don't even know who these 'others' are, but THEY might be upset, so I comply.
I was actually WARNED in a restaurant one time for laughing too loudly!
The manager came over and said crabbily:
'Some of my customers are annoyed by your laughter- why don't you keep it down?'
I asked him who these customers were. He refused to say, so I stood up and said,
'could I see a show of hands of people that are upset by the sound of my laughter?'
(no one raised their hands, so i said to the manager, 'good. the matter is settled.')"
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