Self Arrogant "SILLYNESS" Monkey!
" there is always some reason to not feel good enough... and it's hard at the end of the day."
Song lyrics tell us we are not alone in feeling in adequate. Wait a minute. If everyone is feeling in adequate then what bar are we measuring ourselves to? If everyone out there ( even if it's only the vast majority) is feeling that they are not good enough WHAT is the good enough we see that we aren't?
We look back at the 50's and chortle over the social pressure to have the cookie cutter homes with cookie cutter lawns and cookie cutter kids and all the appearances of keeping up with the neighbours and their neighbours. " what sillyness" we will say while pointing and rolling our eyes. Yet isn't that what we are doing now? Again? repeating a pattern that, perhaps, never went away! Just so buried in the situation we don't have the personal distance enough to know we should be pointing and going " what sillyness!"
Areas of feelings of inadequacy:
Weight/appearance
finances
status
achievements/accomplishments
So if I were to put out a poll asking WHO felt that they were HAPPY with where they were on each of those areas, how many would respond with EXCELLENT! How many would respond with " i need to try harder"? How many would respond with " feel inadequate"? And how many would respond with "SUCKING/FAILING"?
Would the knowledge that we are not alone in our feelings help? would it inspire us to see that we aren't as far down the scale as we see our isolated backsides as being? or would it push us to glare at society even further with a statement of" big deal... so everyone sucks. Doesn't mean I don't." ?
Where are we getting the statements or standards that we are measuring ourselves to? self? Friends? Neighbours? Media? What does this success that we keep thinking we should be truly look like and would it TRULY be successful and fulfilling when we get there?
I have a lot of questions but not a lot of answers. I know that " they", those ellusive omnipotent entities that SAY a lot, are just as alive and kicking in this day and age as they were in the 50's and I need to find some way to step back and roll my eyes. I need to find what it is I want rather than what I should have. I need to then find out what it will take to have what I want and go after it with the conviction that it is for me and not for anyone or thing else. And then, through this process, I need to stop being my grade 4 math teacher with her red sharpie marks of failure, and just see the journey as taking steps through and not every day as a test that I pass or fail.
One does not tell a child learning to walk that they are a failure because TODAY they didn't meet a standard. Why am I so self arrogant to tell myself that TODAY I failed because I haven't learned what I need yet to put the next foot forward. I will be learning new things until the day I die. How then am I a failure today for not knowing what I will know in the future? What makes me a failure?
And am I really a better person for judging myself so harshly?
Seems a rhetorical question when taken outside the brain. What a Self Arrogant " SILLYNESS" monkey!
Song lyrics tell us we are not alone in feeling in adequate. Wait a minute. If everyone is feeling in adequate then what bar are we measuring ourselves to? If everyone out there ( even if it's only the vast majority) is feeling that they are not good enough WHAT is the good enough we see that we aren't?
We look back at the 50's and chortle over the social pressure to have the cookie cutter homes with cookie cutter lawns and cookie cutter kids and all the appearances of keeping up with the neighbours and their neighbours. " what sillyness" we will say while pointing and rolling our eyes. Yet isn't that what we are doing now? Again? repeating a pattern that, perhaps, never went away! Just so buried in the situation we don't have the personal distance enough to know we should be pointing and going " what sillyness!"
Areas of feelings of inadequacy:
Weight/appearance
finances
status
achievements/accomplishments
So if I were to put out a poll asking WHO felt that they were HAPPY with where they were on each of those areas, how many would respond with EXCELLENT! How many would respond with " i need to try harder"? How many would respond with " feel inadequate"? And how many would respond with "SUCKING/FAILING"?
Would the knowledge that we are not alone in our feelings help? would it inspire us to see that we aren't as far down the scale as we see our isolated backsides as being? or would it push us to glare at society even further with a statement of" big deal... so everyone sucks. Doesn't mean I don't." ?
Where are we getting the statements or standards that we are measuring ourselves to? self? Friends? Neighbours? Media? What does this success that we keep thinking we should be truly look like and would it TRULY be successful and fulfilling when we get there?
I have a lot of questions but not a lot of answers. I know that " they", those ellusive omnipotent entities that SAY a lot, are just as alive and kicking in this day and age as they were in the 50's and I need to find some way to step back and roll my eyes. I need to find what it is I want rather than what I should have. I need to then find out what it will take to have what I want and go after it with the conviction that it is for me and not for anyone or thing else. And then, through this process, I need to stop being my grade 4 math teacher with her red sharpie marks of failure, and just see the journey as taking steps through and not every day as a test that I pass or fail.
One does not tell a child learning to walk that they are a failure because TODAY they didn't meet a standard. Why am I so self arrogant to tell myself that TODAY I failed because I haven't learned what I need yet to put the next foot forward. I will be learning new things until the day I die. How then am I a failure today for not knowing what I will know in the future? What makes me a failure?
And am I really a better person for judging myself so harshly?
Seems a rhetorical question when taken outside the brain. What a Self Arrogant " SILLYNESS" monkey!