On Vox: Retail idiocy
Let's start with a little story.
Imagine that Abby, Bob and Charlie are all friends. Abby goes to Bob and says, "Hey, I'd like to do something really nice for Charlie, but I have to head back home and can't stick around to see it through. Here's 200 dollars -- Tell Charlie he can go on a shopping spree and use my money when he gets to the register."
Charlie goes on his shopping trip and everything is going reasonably well. He has a little bit of trouble finding $200 worth of stuff to buy because he's a simple guy and he doesn't need much, but he finally finds everything he wants and brings it to the register. However, when he gets there Bob says, "Oh, by the way... I just recently filed for bankruptcy protection. Since you are technically a creditor, I cannot release any funds to you until after the bankruptcy proceedings are concluded and a judge determines what part of the $200 dollars you can have."
Charlie can't believe his ears. "What?!? It was never your money to begin with! It was Abby's money that she asked you to hold on to until I got to the register! How can you do this?"
Bob realizes that he's going to have to do something to mollify Charlie, so he comes up with what he thinks is a compromise. "Listen, here's what we'll do. Abby gave me 4 $50 bills. I'll let you spend them if you also pitch in to the purchase 50/50. For every $100 you purchase I'll pitch in one of these fifties, so it's like your dollars are going twice as far! By the way, I can't break the fifties and let you redeem only part of them at a time. You can only get a full $50 at a time for a $100 purchase. Doesn't that sound like a deal?"
"What deal? I didn't want any of this stuff to begin with. Why should I have to spend my money for stuff I don't want when it's already been paid for? We're done here. I'll see you in court." At this point, Charlie stomps out of the store and filed his claim with the bankruptcy judge.
I really wish I was making this stuff up.
Epic fail, Sharper Image. Epic fail.
Originally posted on giddysinger.vox.com