birthdays
Well yesterday was my birthday and it was pretty much as strange as the other 2 have been since Steve has been gone. I hid in bed for a good portion of the day until I absolutely had to get dressed and go pick up my tag for the car. I spent a good portion of that time remembering the birthdays I had while Steve and I were married. The first year we were married he surprised me with a birthday cake he made completely from scratch. It was coarse and resembled cornbread, but I loved it. As the years went by he learned it was much easier to start with a cake mix. But every year he would bake, frost and decorate a cake for me.
He would bring me flowers and would cook dinner that night. The flowers varied from year to year depending on our disposable cash. If possible, it was roses - usually pink or red (my favorites) but they were always beautiful and made me feel special in a way that nothing else ever could. His gifts were always unique. One year it was a lotion I had been trying to find, another year it was convincing my friends and family to go together on a day at a spa. It was never a monetary thing, but was something he knew that I wanted but would ask for. The best gift of all was the year that he replaced my wedding and engagement rings. Our matching rings we got married with were wide and had caused my finger to swell and break out underneath and I had to take them off. So, on my birthday he took me to a jewelry store and said to pick out the rings. We spent the next hour looking and deciding on a ring set.
We walked out of the store and he told me I sure was a cheap date because I had picked a set that was on clearance 75% off.
It was sad to have no cake(family were busy yesterday) and no flowers from him. I found that I had a small pity party in the morning and then started remembering all the special times he gave me to remember about my birthday and I felt so loved and so lucky - some people never have the chance to feel cherished in that way. Sometimes Steve had a hard time expressing his feelings to me, but on my birthday he worked hard to show me how he felt.
I thank God for giving me Steve to love me and let me love him for all those years. So, all in all I guess my birthday was one of memories and that's something pretty special.
He would bring me flowers and would cook dinner that night. The flowers varied from year to year depending on our disposable cash. If possible, it was roses - usually pink or red (my favorites) but they were always beautiful and made me feel special in a way that nothing else ever could. His gifts were always unique. One year it was a lotion I had been trying to find, another year it was convincing my friends and family to go together on a day at a spa. It was never a monetary thing, but was something he knew that I wanted but would ask for. The best gift of all was the year that he replaced my wedding and engagement rings. Our matching rings we got married with were wide and had caused my finger to swell and break out underneath and I had to take them off. So, on my birthday he took me to a jewelry store and said to pick out the rings. We spent the next hour looking and deciding on a ring set.
We walked out of the store and he told me I sure was a cheap date because I had picked a set that was on clearance 75% off.
It was sad to have no cake(family were busy yesterday) and no flowers from him. I found that I had a small pity party in the morning and then started remembering all the special times he gave me to remember about my birthday and I felt so loved and so lucky - some people never have the chance to feel cherished in that way. Sometimes Steve had a hard time expressing his feelings to me, but on my birthday he worked hard to show me how he felt.
I thank God for giving me Steve to love me and let me love him for all those years. So, all in all I guess my birthday was one of memories and that's something pretty special.