A Rough Week
This has been a rough week for us, but we are anxious to see a new week starting. It's amazing how taking things "one day at a time" becomes meaningful. It is twelve days until Christmas and twelve days until our wedding, and despite our recent hardships we are both unduly excited for what is to come.
( Brody, here... )
( Brody, here... )
I agree; I don't think 'life-changing' means much, especially because I don't know that knowing Bill has changed my life. ‘Inspirational’ means even less to me, as I see it used of anyone who has overcome a challenge.
What Bill has been--and is, and will be--is an affirmation. When I've worried about being seen as stupid because I'm Christian, there's Bill, brilliant and Catholic. When I've been afraid to speak up because opinionated people may offend, there's Bill, kind and open-minded, but strong in his opinions and more than willing to make them public. When I get flustered by feeling that no one cares much about morality or values, Bill reminds me that people do. By his existence, Bill gives me faith that there’s more in the world similar to him, more people I can respect, like, admire.
I respect Bill’s mind because his arguments are intelligent and well-supported. I respect Bill as a person because he’s one of the few men I know. To be a man-or to be a woman-involves more than physical age or bodily maturity. It requires a system of principles, ownership of emotions, responsibility for positive and negative actions and their consequences, and the self-knowledge to recognize these emotions and choices for what they are. A man has no need for excuse or rationalization because of this; when he’s hypocritical or jealous he knows, and when he makes bad decisions, he does so consciously, even knowing the potential consequences. He does not hide from himself. I may not know Bill as well as some others, but from what I know of Bill’s writing, he’s braver in his ownership of emotion and more responsible for his choices than most people dare to be. Bill has character, strength, and maturity, and so few people embody these.
I admire Bill because he’s one of the few people I know who seeks to better himself as a whole-to improve in all aspects of his life, not only in knowledge and career, but in spirituality and emotion and in overall goodness, and to make things better for others, too. I would love to have his ambition, his work ethic, and his passion for improvement.
I like Bill because not only for the above reasons, but because Bill has always been more than generous to me, much kinder to me than I deserve. I love him for that. The way to be loved is to put love into the world, and here Bill excels, at least in the context in which I know him.
I apologize if I’m overdoing it with the praise. The last thing I want is to idealize or de-humanize Bill; that’s not healthy for anyone. I’ve seen him in his writing be jealous, bitter, and petty, but as before, he claims ownership of these feelings and responsibility for his actions, and I respect that even if I don’t respect the emotions or actions. I’ve seen him sharp, but never cruel, and willing to apologize or explain his actions when necessary. I’ve seen him be overly gentle to people who didn’t deserve it, but I can’t fault him for being too kind, as his praise always seems to be in earnest, and always designed to set people in a better direction.
As I’ve said, Bill is and will be an affirmation to me. Perhaps he has not yet changed my life significantly, nor has he inspired some great revelation within it, but he has touched my life, and in a way for which I am grateful.
Thank you, Bill.
Love,
Audrey
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