Jul 18, 2005 12:27
Aaaaaaaaaaaack! I dunno what to do! I dunno what to do! I dunno what to dooooooooooooo! I found out today that part of my job is to email book requests. I can't handle talking to strangers! and I always mess up on emails. Unless it's to my friend, I have to have Mother check it. I don't know how to be formal! I don't know how to do it! and I hate asking for help because I never need it. At school I always understand what to do so I never have to ask for help with, say, a math problem or whatever. So when I don't know what to do, I don't like to ask. I just don't do it. But I can't do that with this. This is a big thing. They need these books to review in the magazine.
There is seriously something wrong with me. The other day at Disneyland, I talked to some strangers (which I will get into in another entry) and as soon as I even contemplated talking to them, my whole body started shaking. While I was talking to them, it was even worse! The shaking lasted for almost an hour later, though it got to be less and less as time wore on. And it left me with a really big headache!
But I can't just not do it; and I don't want to tell Melanie about it. I mean, what am I supposed to say? "Um... I can't request books because there's something wrong with me."? Something that isn't even technically diagnosed or anything? Of Course, email isn't as bad as the phone, but still.
*ish in desperate need of help and suggestions* (( That means comment, please! It would help if it were before 6 o'clock ))
work,
shaking,
relationships