Dear Dori - Hesitant Supporter
This is the first article for my advice column in the OUT! newsletter. Enjoy!
Dear Dori,
I have a friend who believes he may be transsexual. He is easily influenced and currently surrounded by trans-identified friends and I'm concerned he may be jumping into the wrong decision about his body. I was wondering how permanent the effects of hormone therapy are and how to express my concerns to him. I don't want to offend or push him away but I want to make sure he's making a sound decision. How can I approach this topic with him before it's too late?
-Hesitant Supporter
Dear Hesitant Supporter,
First, let me ease your concern by saying no one "becomes" transsexual from contact with the transgender community, nor are they "convinced" or "brainwashed" by a trans-sympathetic doctor or therapist. We are all born with our gender identity in tact, but some have a harder time expressing it than others. It sounds like your friend is simply exploring their options in an accepting community. Hormone therapy is safe and effective when carried out with a doctor's care but street hormones are never the answer. I strongly urge them to avoid hormone replacement therapy until they have discussed their options with an endocrinologist. RC Dallas has a great program called GEAR (gear@rcdallas.org) that provides medical assistance every third Monday for transgender individuals but requires a therapist note for hormones. I recommend Feleshia Porter, (www.feleshiaporter.com) who specializes in GLBTQA issues and has flexible fees for students. Just remember to approach your friend with respect and trust them to know who they are and what they need. Be their friend by supporting whatever decision they make and providing any assistance you can.
Your ally,
Dori
Dear Dori,
I have a friend who believes he may be transsexual. He is easily influenced and currently surrounded by trans-identified friends and I'm concerned he may be jumping into the wrong decision about his body. I was wondering how permanent the effects of hormone therapy are and how to express my concerns to him. I don't want to offend or push him away but I want to make sure he's making a sound decision. How can I approach this topic with him before it's too late?
-Hesitant Supporter
Dear Hesitant Supporter,
First, let me ease your concern by saying no one "becomes" transsexual from contact with the transgender community, nor are they "convinced" or "brainwashed" by a trans-sympathetic doctor or therapist. We are all born with our gender identity in tact, but some have a harder time expressing it than others. It sounds like your friend is simply exploring their options in an accepting community. Hormone therapy is safe and effective when carried out with a doctor's care but street hormones are never the answer. I strongly urge them to avoid hormone replacement therapy until they have discussed their options with an endocrinologist. RC Dallas has a great program called GEAR (gear@rcdallas.org) that provides medical assistance every third Monday for transgender individuals but requires a therapist note for hormones. I recommend Feleshia Porter, (www.feleshiaporter.com) who specializes in GLBTQA issues and has flexible fees for students. Just remember to approach your friend with respect and trust them to know who they are and what they need. Be their friend by supporting whatever decision they make and providing any assistance you can.
Your ally,
Dori